Toxic people attach themselves like cinder blocks tied to your ankles, and then invite you for a swim in their poisoned waters.― John Mark Green
Everyone has their share of vices. Some people are annoying while others are difficult to deal with. But a toxic person is someone who blissfully creates a mess with your head, surprisingly unaware of the destruction and chaos they bring along with it. Truly toxic people are not worth your feelings, your efforts or your company for that matter.
Whenever you encounter or spend time with a toxic person, you feel emotionally and psychologically drained, you get filled with pessimism and your intuition tells you something’s not quite right. A Toxic person is anyone who is manipulative, unsupportive, abusive and unhealthy, leaving you feeling drained of your positive life energy.
So, where do you find these toxic people?
You find them everywhere around yourself – home, workplace, while dating and in academic settings too. Maybe at this point of time, you know someone, who you are thinking of right now as you read, who might be toxic for you.
Toxic people are master manipulators, skilled liars, and great actors. They can be hiding everywhere. – Thomas
They do not come with a “I am toxic” placard; ironically, they are the ones who draw our attention the most. They come off as the most decent, innocent, charming, intelligent, kind and optimistic people. And that is how we get drawn to them even before knowing what is happening.
Why avoid toxic people?
Researchers from Friedrich Schiller University in Germany shows just how damaging toxic people are for our mental health. The research concluded that exposure to stimuli that cause strong negative emotions, the same you get when you are exposed to a toxic person—caused subjects’ brains to have a massive stress response. Toxic people activate your stress response – be it through their egoism, their rudeness, their cruelty or through their stealthy manipulative techniques.
Several studies have shown the impact of profound stress on our mind and body. Even a temporary exposure to stressors or stressful situations can make notable changes in the neural connectivity, now wonder what this conflict arousing, stress provoking people might be doing to your brain for over months and years.
Chronic stress can lead to atrophy of the brain mass and decrease its weight.(1) These structural changes bring about differences in the response to stress, cognition and memory(2). Of course, the amount and intensity of the changes are different according to the stress level and the duration of stress (3).
Weeks of stress cause reversible damage to brain cells, and months of stress can permanently destroy them. You see, toxic people don’t just make your life hell but also are hard on your brain.
Constantly being in a conflict as to whether or not you should take a step to drive these toxic people away or try changing their mindset and keeping them, erodes your mental peace. You will be driven to think that life is a lot easier with these people outside the door.
As William Gay puts, “There’s folks you just don’t need. You’re better off without em. Your life is just a little better because they ain’t in it.”
Identifying toxic people:
Before you avoid toxic people you should learn to identify them. You will come across people who have personal issues like anger issues, people whose mindset don’t match yours, emotionally immature people, rude and mean people, people who are disrespectful but toxic people are ahead of all these.
Here are 8 types of toxic people that you better lose to save losing your mind:
1.The gossip monger:
Why are these people toxic?
Ain’t it fun discussing the life and misfortune of others?
Gossiping for some is a great way to pass one’s time. But what one doesn’t realise is that these people are habitual gossipers and will not take a moment to gossip about you, as soon as you turn your back.
If they are having fun time by bavardaging with you, stay rest assured, they will smear campaign you at your back too.
Someone who smiles too much with you can sometimes frown too much with you at your back. ― Michael Bassey Johnson
When there are so many available opportunities to welcome positivity and learn interesting things in life, why pay heed to these people?
Treasure people who lift you up and not the ones who pull you down.