Energy vampires are all around you, but sometimes it can be hard to recognize them, and detect their toxic, and problematic behavior.
Have you ever felt completely drained, depleted, and exhausted around a particular person, for no apparent reason?
If so, you may have come across an energy vampire.
And they’re more common than you think.
If you feel perpetually “sucked dry” by the people in your life, it’s time to get help.
What is an Energy Vampire?
An energy vampire is a person who feeds off your emotional or psychic energy. People who display energy vampire traits generally lack empathy, consideration, and/or emotional maturity. As a result of the pain or insecurity they feel inside, energy vampires are addicted to preying on the vitality of others as an attempt to heal their inner suffering.
Essentially, an energy vampire could be anyone such as a friend, family member, colleague, acquaintance, child, son or daughter, or even a romantic partner. If you’re a highly empathetic and caring person, it’s also possible to actively attract energy vampires into your life. Unfortunately, if you’re a highly sensitive person who doesn’t know how to set boundaries, it’s quite likely that you’re already surrounded by energy vampires left, right, and center.
Energy vampires are attracted to you because they unconsciously desire to resolve a deeper problem within their psyches — and they perceive YOU as the solution to their problems.
6 Energy Vampire Types
While it’s easy to feel resentful towards energy vampires, it’s important to remember that they haven’t developed the capacity to deal with their issues yet. Energy vampires prey on others because they are in pain. However, the important thing to remember is that you are NOT responsible for resolving their issues. THEY are responsible for sorting out their struggles.
Often, an energy vampire leaves us feeling so drained that we are incapable of taking care of ourselves. As a result of constantly interacting with an energy vampire, we might feel chronically fatigued, depressed, anxious, irritable or angry.
It’s vital that you learn how to “draw the line” and set boundaries around these types of people. Without learning how to identify the different types of energy vampires in your life, it will be difficult for you to practice self-nurturing and assertiveness.
Here are the six main energy vampire types out there:
1. The Victim Or Martyr Vampire
Victim or Martyr Vampires prey off your guilt. Victims/Martyrs believe that they are “at the mercy” of the world and suffer primarily due to other people. Instead of taking self-responsibility for their lives, Victim/Martyr Vampires continually blame, manipulate, and emotionally blackmail others.
The dysfunctional behavior of the Victim/Martyr Vampire is due to their extremely low self-esteem. Without always receiving signs of love, thanks, and approval, Victim/Martyr Vampires feel unworthy and unacceptable, which they try to resolve by making you feel guilty and sucking away your sympathy/empathy.
How to nurture your energy: When you’re around a Victim/Martyr Vampire, be aware of the self-pity cues. For example, a self-pity cue could be the person’s tendency to blame another person for their suffering, or perhaps a description of how terrible their day has been. Don’t get involved in their self-pity. Limit your interaction with them if possible.
2. The Narcissist Vampire
A Narcissist Energy Vampire has no capacity to show empathy, or genuine interest, towards other people. Narcissist Vampires carry the unconscious philosophy of “ME first, YOU second.” Therefore, Narcissist Vampires will constantly expect you to put them first, feed their egos, and do what they say.
Narcissist Vampires will also manipulate you with false charm, but will just as quickly turn around and stab you in the back. If you have a Narcissist Vampire in your life, you might feel a sense of extreme disempowerment as you feel crushed beneath their limelight.
How to nurture your energy: If you’re unable to cut this person off from your life right now, you might like to limit contact. You could also show the Narcissistic Vampire how your requests satisfy their self-interest, particularly if you’re in a working relationship.
3. The Dominator Vampire
Dominator Vampires love to feel superior and like “alpha” males or females. Due to their deep inner insecurities of being “weak” or “wrong” (and therefore hurt), Dominator Vampires must overcompensate by intimidating you.
Often Dominator Vampires are loud-mouthed types of people who have rigid beliefs and black and white perceptions of the world. They are often racist, sexist, and/or bigoted.
How to nurture your energy: Agree to disagree. Practice assertiveness when necessary and limit your contact with Dominator Vampires. Realize that their attempt to scare you is sourced from their deep fear of being dominated and thus hurt.
4. The Melodramatic Vampire
The Melodramatic Energy Vampire thrives on creating problems. Often, their need to create constant drama is a product of dark underlying emptiness in their lives.