Narcissists are truly toxic and evil beings who leave no stone unturned when it comes to hurting the ones who love them. They will not care in the slightest what they are doing to others, as long as their needs are being met. So, when you finally realize their toxicity and call it off with them, how a narcissist deals with a breakup says everything you need to know.
The way a narcissist deals with a breakup is anything but normal, and the quicker you understand that, the better it will be for you. It will help you not fall for their manipulative tactics that they so frequently employ.
What happens when you break up with a narcissist?
When you break up with a narcissist, you have to be prepared to take an emotional roller coaster ride. It is not an easy task by any means.
You might have already gone through other sources of information on this subject like other articles, or the advice of a trusted therapist. All of them would have told you that the best course of action is to cut ties completely.
This has consequences. The narcissist is addicted to the ego boost they receive from you and just like a junkie with his heroin, if you cut off their supply, they’ll begin to experience symptoms of ‘withdrawal’. They’ll immediately start looking for their next fix so they’ll take one of two paths. They will go away, with no thought for all the pain and hurt they’ve caused and.
Or, they’ll come right back and single-mindedly pursue you till they can get you back. They cannot handle loneliness and someone has to be around to constantly validate their feelings.
The break-up represents a threat to the narcissist
A narcissist deals with a break up horribly. If you stick to your resolve to cut off any forms of contact, this will automatically represent a threat to the narcissist. Much like a wounded animal, they’ll lash out by doing something insane.
They’ll pretend like they’re the best person on earth if that’s what it comes to and they won’t stoop to levels like blackmailing you with threats of suicide and self-harm if nothing else works out.
The narcissist will keep coming back if there is even the smallest chance of getting a fix from you or the way you react to their actions might even give them enough to keep them going.
Understand that the narcissist knows perfectly well that they are hurting you. But they simply don’t care about anyone but themselves. Even the smallest reaction from you will make them come running, so be very careful. Don’t underestimate how patient a narcissist can be. The narcissist won’t mind waiting if they think they can somehow worm themselves back into the place they held before. They’ll keep at it till an opportunity presents itself and come back without any apology or explanation.
They might have secured a fix somewhere else but once that runs out, they’ll come back to you for the kick they get out of knowing that they hold power over someone. Your action of casting away all ties will shake them to the very core so they’ll pull out whatever trick they can come back with to re-conquer you.
But if the narcissist realizes that you’re on to their game, they’ll begin avoiding you just in case you decide to reveal their true face to others. Chances are they’ll stop contacting you and since they don’t have any scruples, they’ll be able to move on to another victim quite fast.