Narcissist mirroring is so manipulative they fool you into loving them.
They study you, then put on the perfect mask that mirrors your desires and dreams.
They become the fantasy partner, but it’s You you’ve fallen in love with.
When I first met my ex, it was as if he were magnetized.
He hadn’t spoken a word.
All he had to do was to look across the room at me with his big baby blue eyes and I was a goner.
There was something about him and I was drawn to him.
I can’t describe how powerful that feeling was.
Butterflies went on a rampage in my stomach.
He’s The One!
You can’t explain it, it just feels right.
Many of you say the same.
You were swept off your feet.
The relationship moved at an incredible pace.
It was a whirlwind romance.
What makes a narcissist or abusive type so attractive to some of us?
A subtle manipulative tactic, known as mirroring.
Narcissists are the ultimate manipulators.
Before they’ve met you or in the first minutes of your meeting they study you.
They observe everything about you and have the ability to read you fast.
What your passions are.
What excites you.
What you crave in your life or what’s missing from it.
Then they morph into that person and embody everything you want them to be.
They put the perfect mask on and mirror your desires and dreams, your hopes and beliefs back to you.
This person is amazing.
I’ve never met anybody like them.
I thought that when I first met my ex.
He’s The One!
It’s a gut feeling you can’t explain.
The connection felt so deep and rapid.
Narcissists lack a form of empathy.
They have the basic impulses we all have.
The basic emotions and feelings such as fear or anger.
But they lack the sophisticated feelings, that rational side that most people have.
For example, most of us can temper anger with the rational adult logical side of us that says that this base impulse is not great to let get out of control.
We can see a disaster on television and feel empathy and sadness for the victims as we can feel other people’s pain.
They can’t feel them in the same way.
This what is known as emotional empathy.
But they can see it in other people.
They can read this reaction, even if it’s not innate to them.
In fact, they make up for this lack with a brilliant ability to read others and mimic this behavior.
They’re great actors, who ape those feelings.
They know exactly which mask is required depending on the person or the situation.
And they can wear a lot of different masks at the same time.
When you first meet a narcissist and you express feelings about things, have opinions about things or love a certain food or music, they’ll mimic that.
Suddenly they will talk like you, love the same things you do, feel the same passionate beliefs about the things that you do.
That is narcissist mirroring.
What they’ve read and observed and studied about you they reflect back to you.
Essentially what’s happening when they love-bomb you, in the beginning, is you’re falling in love with yourself.
I know that sounds weird.
But you are falling in love with a mirrored version.
That’s why it feels amazing.
It feels right and so good.
They will keep doing that as long as it takes to hook you in.
And entangle you into the relationship.
They’ll keep love-bombing you and making you feel amazing within yourself.
They keep acting the part of the perfect partner.
As long as it takes for you to be really enmeshed in that relationship.
If you at any point are still questioning their bad behavior when they let that mask slip for a second – which they do at the start – then whoosh! the mask will come back up and they’ll reel you in again.