in

I No Longer Need You.

I No Longer Need You.

I thought it would be painful, letting you go.

I thought I would suffer, that my heart would be anguished with the loss of you. Or worse, maybe it would stop beating altogether.

Maybe without you, I would simply cease to exist.

I thought I would become adrift, for you had been the anchor I had formed my identity upon, the compass I had relied on for my direction. I thought without you I would become lost, disoriented.

I had expected to taste salty tears as they fell upon lips that once spoke so fondly of you; that my head would lay on my pillow damp with tears for as many nights as the moon continued to kiss the stars.

But one day, I just knew.

I hadn’t expected such a feeling of relief as I cut the ropes that once shackled me to you. One instant of tremendous clarity. One instant, where I finally knew.

I no longer needed you.

I no longer needed your opinion of me, your affirmation, your approval.

I no longer needed your judgments, your criticisms, your condemnations.

I no longer needed your expectations I could never meet; your hoops too high to jump through, your goal posts that shifted with every changing breeze.

I no longer needed your blame, your excuses, your justifications.

I no longer needed your pseudo love, fraught with conditions and attached with strings.

I thought I needed you. I didn’t.

I thought it would be hard to let you go. It wasn’t.

I thought I would miss you. I don’t.

For in one instant my heart was awakened to the truth of who I am.

I am more than the lies you made believe about myself. I am more than the look of failure in your eyes when I fell short of your demands. I am more than how worthless you made me feel. I am more than the ways you tried to break me.

I am a warrior, sculpted by the hands of creation, fashioned into being by the very hands that created the oceans and the stars and the mountains and air.

I am strong, I am brave, I am wise. I am gentle of spirit with the heart of a lioness.

I am creative, passionate, sensitive, and kind. I am of open heart and open mind. I am powerful, generous, thoughtful, daring, empathetic, raw, complex, courageous, understanding, forgiving.

I am everything you are not.

I will no longer carry the shame you made me suffer under the weight of.

That shame belongs to you.

And I will no longer carry my hate for you.

For that will only ever bind me to your darkness and give you permission to destroy my light. It will allow you to stay within me, to destroy my peace, to blacken my heart with the malice that lives within you.

What do you think?

2023 points
Upvote Downvote

Written by Kathy Parker

Writer. Poet. Survivor. Warrior. Word Alchemist. Kathy Parker is a lover of beautiful words and wide open spaces; a wild heart, passionate soul and gentle spirit. She is a survivor of abuse, sufferer of Complex-PTSD. Her greatest desire is to see all women empowered with the truth of their glorious worth. She is a contributor for The Mighty, Thought Catalog, Truth Code, Lessons Learned In Life and The Minds Journal and also has writing published at Huffington Post Australia and Elephant Journal. The Unravelled Heart, a profoundly true reflection on trauma, abuse, love, loss and healing, now available worldwide on Amazon The Unravelled Heart

2 Comments

Leave a Reply
  1. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this! I just went through a breakup and this article I found on Facebook helped me realize who I am. It helped me stand taller and stronger. It reminded me of what I stand for, it gave me courage and fate and it also made me realize I can live without the one who’s done me so wrong……Thank you for the encouragement.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Rare Pink Moon In Libra On April 11, 2017: Prepare For A Huge Energy Shift!

Rare Pink Moon In Libra On April 11, 2017: Prepare For A Huge Energy Shift!

I’d rather stay quiet…