Are you constantly fighting with a sociopath? Is the toxicity of the relationship making you feel disgusted and broken?
Emotional abuse is a part of life with a narcissistic user.
This is what life is if we’re ensnared by them.
Emotional abuse comes in many flavors. It always comes along with entanglement with a narcissistic user, the predatory sociopath. When a normal person and a sociopath mix, the collision of the normal human brain, and the person with the brain of a pathological sociopath in their head, is inevitable harm to the normal person. And sickeningly, it’s absolute run-of-the-mill, just another day to the sociopath.
There’s nothing else going on in a love scam with a pathological user other than us being used. They need to keep abreast of where we are so we don’t surprise them and catch them red-handed. They want all the money for themselves. They don’t care about what concerns us.
Emotional Abuse and Sociopathic Users are a Package Deal
Once we’re involved and in love, the inevitable fallout of the mix of a normal human and a sociopath is a shock and harm to us… and nothing new, and not at all hurtful for them.
This mind-bending, confusing, collision of a sociopath and a normal person can make us think there’s something wrong with us. There is not. There’s something very, very wrong with a sociopath.
Emotional Abuse Signifies This is Not an Ordinary Relationship.
As normal, gorgeous humans, we think we’re in a real relationship. Naturally, we do what normal people do in real relationships. The sociopath does not. Their odd behavior, unresponsiveness, and sometimes outright meanness trips us up – we try, we try to make things better: as anyone would in a relationship.
In the beginning, a sociopath gauges what matters to us. They fulfill that. As the weeks go by, they discern what we won’t tolerate or forgive, what will keep us trusting, even when they become neglectful or mean. They innately know, or simply guess until they get it right and discover which behavior of theirs will bend us to their will most effectively.
Crimes Rather Than Relationships
In reality, we’ve been hijacked, kidnapped without realizing it. We’re not with a normal person, sociopaths have abnormal brains. As a sociopath goes about their day in the world they present a false self, even the barista or car wash attendant isn’t seeing a real person.
Normal Relationships are Mutual
We try to keep things harmonious, humans need harmony within their lives and relationships. If both people were normal, both people would contribute to harmony within the relationship, this is not the case with a sociopath.
While we pitch-in and spend a lot of effort self-reflecting, wondering if “it’s our fault,” and trying to make things right, work out the kinks, adjust our perception of what a relationship – this relationship – should be, and continue to relationship-build, it takes a while to notice, we’re doing it alone.
We don’t get anywhere trying to make things good. There’s always a particular moment when it hit’s us: something is very wrong here, and normal isn’t working to fix it… because they aren’t normal.
They lead us to feeling convinced we did something to make it happen, or that it didn’t happen, or they ignore us.
Sociopath’s Minds Collide with Ours
Hooked-in, we’re in a kind of “hypnosis” in a cloud of confusion. As the good stuff and whirlwind beginnings wear off and the crazy begins we’re twirling on a merry-go-round emotionally.
We discover if we question them about specific unpleasant or odd things they’ve done, the sociopath gets mad. They lead us to feel convinced we did something to make it happen, or that it didn’t happen, or they ignore us.
A sociopath wants us kept locked in their spell, they know that an emotional reaction from us is a sign we’re “still in”. They truly do not care what emotions make our stay.
Narcissistic users bent on coercive control to attain their personal gains show rage and even violent behavior if he or she thinks they’re losing their grip on getting the things they want. They like to keep what they take. Though not all sociopaths use physical violence within every predator/prey circumstance, some are incredibly violent.