Initial desires of the narcissist. They have these wants at the outset of any relationship with you.
I am red of tooth and claw. I seduce, I hurt, I cast to one side and like some malevolent Pied Piper, I play my tunes once again and draw you into my fabricated world. I operate a zero-sum policy.
I want what you have. If I gain it, I win. I love to win. I must always win.
The winner is the conqueror, the strongest, and the survivor. This is what I have been taught. That is the reality of my existence. Yet when you have been selected as our targets and the seduction has commenced, we have certain desires that we want to be true.
There are initial desires that exist so that we do not have to go down the road so often traveled. We may have ensnared you but might we remain protector rather than persecutor?
We have these wants at the outset of our coupling with you.
These are genuine, well-intentioned, and considerable in nature. We are imbued with hope, optimism and confidence, every time a new prospect has been embraced by us.
We want these things so that the teeth are never bared and the claws remain lowered.
The Ten Initial Desires of the Narcissist
1. You are the one.
I chose you because you are so special. I truly believe that you are the one, this time, to change everything that has happened before. You are the one who will save us, you have been selected beyond everybody else because you are the one. That is why we have such an infatuation with you at the outset of our relationship.
2. You will not betray us.
The world is a cruel and harsh place and we know better than most how that is the case. We are surrounded by those who would strike us down and grind us into the nothingness which we fear. Those assassins lurk and wait, seeking their moment and we must ensure we remain vigilant so we do not fall prey to them.
Traitors and betrayers mill about us, but we are wise to them. We know their game and we have them in our eyes. We do not want you to be one of them.
3. You won’t be like the others.
We thought they would be the ones that we desired but they were disappointed and dismayed and they left us no choice other than to punish them for their lack of loyalty and their false promises. We had to do so, otherwise, a failure to act would only compound the perception of our weakness and we must at all times project to the world our image of success and magnificence.
We hope you will not be like them so we need not maintain such a façade and we hope you will prove your worth so that you will not be like the others and let us down.
4. You will stop the emptiness.
Each and every day we must seek to fill the void that lurks within. It is part of what we are and we accept that this is the task that must be addressed because so much rests on being able to perform this important act. It is the reason for our existence but perhaps you can stop that sense of emptiness for us. Perhaps you can take away that void and provide us with the substance that we crave.
5. You quell the fury.
It is always there, churning away, waiting to be unleashed and directed at some transgressor, critic or traitor. I have learned to control it, many of my kind cannot do so and will never do so, it is a mark of my excellence and my superiority. I make it work for me, to advance my plans and to smite my foes. I have no choice for it is always there, waiting to be ignited in an instant. I can control it but I cannot quell it. Can you be the one to do this for me?