Being in a relationship with a narcissist is a world of woes in itself. Things get even worse when they get a back-up, AKA, Flying Monkeys. Flying Monkeys are the evil sidekicks of the narcissist who continue to torment you even when you have broken all contact from the culprit.
In a just and fair world, these selfish and completely self-centered people would be called out for their controlling behavior. But that is rarely the case. Most of the time, their victims find themselves alone and stranded because they have managed to turn everyone else against them too. You see, their victims aren’t the only people that narcissists are capable of manipulating and brainwashing. There is a whole bunch of people which these narcissists like to keep under their command.
Flying Monkeys are also known by the following terms:
- An extension of the narcissist
Who has the potential to become Flying Monkeys?
It can be particularly heartbreaking if these Flying Monkeys are your mutual friends or your close friends and even members of your family. It is very easy for a narcissist to manipulate and mold these people against you. After all, isn’t manipulating the one craft that they are great at? So rest assured, your good, sensible, logical friends can very easily turn into sycophants, willing to do whatever it is that the narcissist wants them to.
There is another important reason why some people turn into Flying Monkeys for the narcissist, and that is they might have any underlying condition which the narcissist exploits to make them do their bidding. Here are a few examples of people who might end up being a narcissist’s Flying Monkeys.
1. People with Anxiety Disorder.
People who suffer from anxiety disorder tend to look for validation more often than not. Apprehensive and anxious thoughts are always swirling in their minds, and this is exactly what the narcissist exploits. The narcissist’s overconfidence and arrogance attract them and they wish them to be more like the narcissist.
Because of this, people with an anxiety disorder are drawn to narcissists like moths to a flame. Their anxiety becomes their greatest weakness and the narcissist’s greatest weapon.
2. People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
Narcissists will be drawn to other narcissists, because obviously. They have the same aspirations, mindset, and the same tricks up their sleeves. However, when one narcissist submits to the other and agrees to be their Flying Monkey, it is normally because they will get something useful in return, such as power, money, prestige, influence, etc. They might hope to take the place of the main narcissist.
Sociopaths tend to hide behind narcissists and don’t mind being in their shadow, but that does not mean they are any less diabolical. Sociopaths become Flying Monkeys for narcissists not because they revere the latter, but because their attacks and tricks will go unnoticed in the midst of the narcissist’s dirty games.
Narcissists think that they are ruling over the sociopath, and the sociopath lets them think that. In reality, it is the sociopath who is playing the narcissist by exploiting their weaknesses and vulnerabilities.
When a narcissist empowers an addict, they will do anything in their power to stay in the narcissist’s good books, because at the end of the day all the addict needs is a fix, and the narcissist will be happy to provide that. The narcissist knows very well what they need to do to make sure the addict does their bidding.
As long as the addict is showering an unhealthy amount of attention on the narcissist, the narcissist will keep on satisfying their needs. However, if the addict becomes too needy, the narcissist will discard them without even giving them a second thought.
5. Co-dependent people.
Co-dependent people and narcissists are toxic for each other, is an understatement, since they feed their mutual toxicity to each other in a very unhealthy and horrendous manner. Narcissists are dependent on them to feed their insecurities and vulnerabilities and the co-dependents are happy to do that. Co-dependents have no problem serving others and being subservient to them, in order to enjoy a sense of purpose and satisfaction.
How do narcissists use Flying Monkeys to torment their victims?
What the narcissist is not able to do, their Flying Monkeys will. No matter how low they might need to stoop, they would still do so, just to make their leader AKA, the narcissist happy. For example, if they come to know that you have recently started dating someone at work, they will find a way to turn up at your office and manipulate your partner into believing that they should not be with you.