How To Develop Emotional Stability: 5 Empowering Steps


How To Develop Emotional Stability Empowering Steps

When you learn to develop emotional stability, you learn to handle adversity and stay productive during stressful situations. It allows you to effectively manage negative emotions and live a happier life.

What is emotional stability

Being emotionally stable means you have the inner strength to face life’s challenges and remain calm even when your life seems the most chaotic.Emotional stability is a desirable trait. It means you can withstand difficult situations, handle adversity, and remain productive and capable throughout,” says neuroscientist and author Nicole Gravagna. She adds To become emotionally stable, you must be willing to drive headlong in the opposite direction of becoming emotionally expressive, if only temporarily.

We cannot control life, but we can always control our emotions. We lose our jobs, our relationships end, we lose loved ones and life gets out of control. When you develop emotional stability, you can better cope with life’s problems, manage your own emotions, stay grounded and find balance. You know when and how to take the right steps to bring your life back on track and experience inner peace and happiness.

Psychologist Arthur E. Poropat explainsMore emotionally stable people have weaker reactions to negative stimuli and hence are less readily discouraged, less distractible, and more confident in their own abilities.” In fact, studies show that there is a direct relationship between emotional stability and confidence in maintaining balance.

Author Genefe Navilon explains “Emotional stability means having the ability to deflect negative affectivity – the tendency to experience the world in negative emotions.

She says an emotionally stable person can –

  • Remain calm and composed during difficult situations
  • Stay productive and capable during obstacles and challenges
  • Doesn’t feel burdened by negative emotions constantly
  • Has a strong sense of self-esteem and self-confidence

When you develop emotional stability, you strengthen your emotional core. It provides you the inner strength to face life and experience happiness.

Read 6 Traits Of An Emotionally Mature Person

Why you need to be emotionally stable

Cultivating emotional stability doesn’t mean you hide or ignore your emotions. All your emotions are important and valuable, whether it’s negative or positive. There is a reason why we feel love, hatred, anger, compassion, envy, inspiration and many other emotions. When you pay close attention to your emotions, you will realize they are trying to tell you something. Ignoring or suppressing your emotions will make you emotionally unstable.

Emotional stability doesn’t mean that you never get mad or angry, but it does mean that you have the wherewithal to process those emotions and see them for what they are: responses to your thoughts about a situation or circumstance,” explains author and entrepreneur Lachlan Brown.

Emotions can be tricky. However, being emotionally unstable can lead to a lot of psychological and emotional problems. When you bottle up your feelings for a long period of time, they can often surface when you least expect it and damage your career, relationships, and personal life. 

Emotional instability is caused by a lifetime of trying to control your emotions. Controlling your emotions, tamping them down or limiting yourself to short periods of expression, for years or decades causes emotions to back up,” writes neuroscientist Nicole Gravagna.

So learn to acknowledge and accept your emotions. Learning how to develop emotional stability can enable you to practice emotional healing and overcome the entrapment of emotional instability.

Read 12 Warning Signs Someone Is Emotionally Unstable

5 ways to develop emotional stability

If you want to be unafraid of change, manage your anxiety and live a better life even when you face obstacles, then learning to develop emotional stability is imperative. Emotional stability is a trait that you can learn and develop over time. However, it will not be the easiest thing to do. Once you learn to master your emotions and become resilient, you will be able to stay grounded and balanced even during the most uncomfortable moments of your life.

Here are 5 ways to develop emotional stability and live a happier, better, and more resilient life.

1. Shift your perspective

Whenever anything bad happens in our life, we immediately have a strong negative reaction to it. Negative experiences often lead to negative emotional responses which are much stronger than it needs to be. As most of us don’t expect the worst to happen to us at any given moment, we tend to react strongly which clouds our judgment and decision-making abilities.

However, when you change your perspective and look at things in a  different way, you will realize that challenges are often opportunities in disguise.

We all have tunnel-vision – we only see what we want to see. But you’ll be surprised how looking at things differently can help you assess negative life situations better,”writes author Genefe Navilon.

Due to negative bias, humans are tricked into looking at the negative aspects more than the positive outcomes of a situation. The fact is, there is always an upside to every adversity you face. But it ultimately depends on how you look at an experience.

Bestselling author Stephen Guise explainsI think by default we tend to pick the worst one because negative events bias our mind to negative thoughts about those events. But if we consider other, more positive perspectives, we can reverse this negativity cycle. Look for the positives in negative situations – they’re there!

Just realize that things could have been a lot worse. So try to be grateful for what you have and shift your perspective.

2. Express your emotions

Acknowledge, understand, accept and express all your emotions, whether good or bad. Studies have found that ignoring or suppressing your emotions can lead to depression and other mental health issues.

One 2019 study showed that “expressing one’s true emotions and the feeling is crucial to physical health, mental health, and general well-being, while a reliance on concealment gives rise to a barrier to good health.” When you hide or bottle your emotions up, it eventually leads to an inappropriate outburst of emotions

Learning to develop emotional stability starts with expressing your feelings. Neuroscientist Nicole Gravagna explains “Humans require regular emotional hygiene, and if you haven’t been doing that kind of thing, then you are probably backed up emotionally. Emotional hygiene is a practice of allowing yourself to feel all the way to the bottom of whatever emotion is present for you.

It means you respect yourself and your emotions. It means you value your negative emotions as much as your positive emotions. It means you have the inner strength to face your emotions instead of running away hiding from them. Genefe Navilon writes “You need to feel emotional pain, pay attention to it, as well as address the psychological wounds it creates. Otherwise, they have no hope of healing.

Read How to Stop Feeling Anxious, Depressed and Emotionally Overwhelmed

3. Check your expectations

If you wish to develop emotional stability, then expect things to go wrong at the last moment. Life is an adventure. There are lots of risks and dangers, but it can also be highly enjoyable and rewarding. If you expect your life to be smooth, then you’re going to be disappointed. Genefe Navilon explains “Emotionally stable people appear calm in crazy situations because they’re not shocked that they’re happening. They didn’t anticipate it, but they know there’s a possibility they could happen.

Think of life more as a roller coaster, than a walk in the park. The more mentally prepared you are for negative experiences, the less emotionally reactive and more emotionally stable you will be.

Stephen Guise writes “Are you expecting a smooth, linear, predictable life of goodness? Well, it won’t ever happen to anyone. The next time something bad happens to you, think of it as a challenge instead of a huge problem. Be ready for challenges, and they won’t catch you off guard.” 

You don’t need to be a pessimist and expect unexpected challenges and disappointments to crop up every single moment of your life. You simply need to be aware that life can go haywire at any moment. Those who expect that life will throw you difficulties and disappointments are the ones who are the strongest and most resilient out of all of us,” adds Genefe.

Read 6 Ways To Build Emotional Resilience and become Unfuckwithable

4. Create an action plan

When life seems bleak, it is likely you will experience an emotional turmoil and lack willpower, energy and motivation. This is why it is crucial that you have an action plan to help you develop emotional stability. Figure out what you can do to get out of the situation you’re in. When you have a clear intention, you will feel a rush of energy inside you, which will motivate you to take the necessary action.

Emotionally stable individuals know exactly what they need to do to get out of the dump so that it doesn’t cripple them for too long, says Genefe Navilon. She adds “What you should do is to create micro-plans: a checklist of things that can get you moving.” Make plans that enable you to accomplish small daily tasks that you wouldn’t be able to complete otherwise. It can be anything from taking a shower to sending an email. As you progress through your checklist, you will start getting more things done.

Moving life forward is key to emotional health because it’s the ultimate sign that you haven’t given up… Small steps forward are infinitely better than no steps taken at all. Thus, creating action plans and taking action are very helpful to reinforce your emotional health and stability,” writes Bestselling author Stephen Guise.

Read Healing Your Emotional Triggers: 5 Ways to Be Less Reactive

5. Learn to say “NO”

If you want to develop emotional stability, then one of the fundamental ways to do it is to stop saying “yes” all the time and say “no”, when you want to, according to nuclear engineer Melissa Ricker. She says that people who are emotionally stable “do not over-commit themselves or make false promises. They just say no to requests that they don’t want to do or don’t have time for.

If you are emotionally unstable, then it is likely that you have difficulty saying no and as a result others take advantage of you. Emotionally stability gives you the confidence to say no. These calm, yet assertive people don’t feel bad about saying no either, and they don’t even need to explain why they are saying no. After all, “No” is a complete sentence,” adds Melissa.

Although you don’t need to be mean or rude to tell what you genuinely feel, you need to do what’s best for you no matter what. Otherwise you might end up losing not just your emotional stability, but also your self-esteem.

When you don’t say no to anything, you are saying yes to everything,” says entrepreneur Lachlan Brown. He adds “In order to find more balance, you need to stop saying yes to everything and feeling like you owe all your time to other people. Start by cutting out the things that drain your energy and awareness and be diligent about saying no when the moment, opportunity, or even a person doesn’t serve you.

When you say no to certain responsibilities, expectations, requests and people, you create more space for what is actually important to you.

Read How Emotionally Intelligent People Handle Toxic People

However, that’s not all. There are many other ways for you to develop emotional stability. Here are some of the most simple and effective ways to cultivate emotional stability in your life:

  • Identify your stress and anxiety triggers
  • Be selective about your social circle 
  • Engage in hobbies and do things that you love
  • Make sure to seek help when you need it
  • Accept your flaws and be authentic
  • Tune into your intuition and instincts
  • Listen more than you speak
  • Practice mindfulness meditation and breathing exercises
  • Take risks and learn from mistakes & failures
  • Take good care of yourself
  • Practice self-healing
  • Listen to relaxing music

Develop emotional stability and cultivate happiness

No matter what the circumstances in your life may be, tell yourself that you’re always in control – if not of the situation, then in control of yourself and your reactions. Decide how you want to respond to life and be intentional in your approach. Life is what you make of it, not what happens to you. 

Licensed clinical psychologist Chloe Carmichael, Ph.D. explains “When you feel like your emotions aren’t your own, remember that you can still choose how to react to those emotions. With a little mindfulness and a bit of practice, being emotionally stable is achievable. Emotional stability starts from you, but don’t hesitate to get help managing your emotions if you need it.

Control your emotions to control yourself. Control yourself to control your life. 

Read 7 Things You Need To Do To Heal Emotionally

Ways To Develop Emotional Stability pin
How To Develop Emotional Stability Empowering Steps pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Up Next

5 Powerful Benefits of Imaginative Thinking

Imaginative Thinking: Powerful Benefits Of Imagination

The benefits of imaginative thinking are unending to be honest. However, in this article we are going to explore five of the most interesting and powerful benefits of imagination and imaginative thinking.


Imagination is a fundamental aspect of human life.

Imagination enables one to look beyond the world as it is.

Imagination helps create different lenses through which to see the world.


Up Next

What Kind Of Angry Are You? The 4 Types Of Anger

The Types Of Anger: What Kind Of An Angry Person Are You?

Everyone gets angry at some point, and anger is probably one of the most common emotions we feel. But did you know there are different types of anger, namely, 4 types of anger? This article is going to talk about the different types of anger and how they look like. So, what is your anger style? Let’s find out!

Anger may rear its emotional head in irritation and annoyance, self-pity and withdrawal, envy and resentment, or vengeance and violence. Our anger may fill the room with dominance or veil itself in anxiety or avoidance.

Those who internalize anger may question whether they have the right to be angry and avoid direct confrontation. They stuff their anger down to prevent offending, being disliked, or losing control.

Those who externalize anger resort to blaming, shaming, and engage i

Up Next

Stop Texting Your Ex ‘Happy Birthday’ – Here Are 5 Reasons Why!

Stop Texting Your Ex Happy Birthday: Important Reasons

Have you found yourself scrolling through Snapchat memories, thinking of texting your ex happy birthday? You think to yourself, can sending a simple “Happy Birthday” text hurt? But don’t be fooled by temptation – it’s never a good idea.

Life is full of ups and downs, but some things are better left alone. Making contact with them on their special day could stir up old emotions and put you in a tough place.

It not only opens doors to issues but also sends mixed signals, confuses both parties involved, and even more so can bring back haunting memories that should stay in the

Up Next

50+ Deep Self Reflection Questions For Personal Growth

Deep Self Reflection Questions For Personal Growth

Are you ready for some deep self reflection about growth? Well, you’ve come to the right place! Self reflection questions are like little nuggets of wisdom that can help you uncover and understand your true self, aid in your personal growth, and make sense of this crazy journey called life.

Whether you’re looking to understand yourself more deeply, set new goals, or simply gain clarity, these self reflection questions are going to serve as your trusty companions. So grab a cozy spot, maybe a cup of tea, and get ready to dive into the depths of your mind, and do some much-needed self reflection about growth.

Related: 40 Deep Questions To Ask I

Up Next

4 Benefits Of Moving Meditation And How To Do It: Dance Your Stress Away!

Ways To Elevate Your Spirit with Moving Meditation Magic

Do you find meditation challenging? Is sitting still during meditation difficult for you? Then you would be more than glad to know about moving meditation. If traditional meditation isn’t working for you, then you can still find inner peace while on the move.

Welcome to the world of moving meditation, where the gentle flow of movement becomes a pathway to inner harmony and mindfulness. Instead of zoning out on a cushion, you can get your zen on while walking, dancing, or even washing dishes. Sounds pretty cool, right? 

Today, let us explore what is moving meditation, discover its various types, delve into the numerous movement meditation benefits, and learn how to incorporate this beautiful practice into our daily lives. Here every step, sway, and scrub becomes a pathway to inner peace. So, let’s dive in.

Up Next

How To Stop A Racing Mind: 7 Techniques For Mastering Mental Turbulence

How To Stop A Racing Mind: Ways To Tame A Racing Mind

Ever found yourself lying in bed, desperately trying to sleep after a long, tiring day, but your mind refuses to do so? It feels like your mind is racing like a Formula 1 car on caffeine. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there! That relentless stream of thoughts can feel overwhelming, leaving you feeling restless and exhausted. So, how to stop a racing mind?

In this article, we’ll talk about the meaning of racing thoughts and how to calm a busy mind. Let’s explore the seven best ways to stop your mind from racing, and discover the blissful art of finding your inner calm amidst all the chaos.

First, let’s talk about the meaning of racing thoughts.


Up Next

8 Ways How To Heal Your Inner Teenager: Say Goodbye To Teenage Wounds And Thrive

How To Heal Your Inner Teenager: Life-Changing Steps

Do you ever feel overwhelmed by emotions, react impulsively, or experience a sense of insecurity and self-doubt? These are signs that your inner teenager might be in need of healing. Let’s explore how to heal your inner teenager.

Hey there, soul wanderer! In life, we often feel stuck, anxious, fearful, and out of touch with our inner selves. This can make us behave and react in certain ways that are reminiscent of our teenage years. This might happen due to certain negative experiences, traumas, and emotional wounds that deeply affected us when we were a teenager. 

Just like a physical wound, our emotional wounds from our teenage years can linger and affect us well into adulthood. This is why healing is absolutely crucial for self-discovery and empowerment. But how to heal the inner teenager?