4 Struggles Only People Who Come From Toxic Family Will Understand


, ,
Struggles Only People From Toxic Families

Growing up in a toxic family has its own set of hardships and struggles, and only someone who belongs to one will well and truly understand that.

For a very long time, the structure of the family was considered the most important unit of society. But in modern times, the structure of the family is gradually collapsing. We may not have as many articles talking about this because the business of the family is still kept under wraps. How much ever we may deny it, but the family as a unit is crumbling down.

This only goes to prove one thing that a certain kind of toxicity has entered this system. This toxicity may result in pain and suffering for the family members. Most importantly, the victim of this toxicity may lead to a life full of stress, anxiety, and insecurity. Toxicity sure can make someone’s entire life absolutely toxic.

But we rarely address this issue. This is because of the sacrosanct status that is given to the family as a structure. The mainstream media wants to portray the family as an indivisible unit of society. Because of such a portrayal, we forget to question the idea of family. When we forget to question a structure, you know what follows. In some time, we ourselves become victims of the structure.

To avoid this, the first thing that we have to realize is that family isn’t as sacred as it is said to be. Secondly, family as a structure has its own set of problems and these problems can cause.

The most shocking part of all this process is that sometimes we don’t even realize that we are victims of the structure of the family. We continue to live our lives thinking that all things that happen within a family are acceptable, without even realizing that maybe sometimes the source of our insecurities and our bad experiences is family itself.

But our desire to get love makes us forget the damage that we are causing to ourselves. Ask the victims of family toxicity. They will surely tell you so much that they face because of their so-called benign family.

Related: How Coming From A Toxic Family Makes You Hard To Love

Here are just four of the serious struggles that people who find themselves in a toxic family face:

1. Communication is Difficult

If you have been a part of the toxic family, you will surely find it very hard to communicate with other people. Why does this happen?

This is because the way we communicate depends totally on what we learn at home. As human beings learn by example, if you see at home that there is a severe communication breakdown, you will never be able to forge communications outside of the home. Thus, all your interactions will be affected by what you go through at home.

Hence, people coming from a family where the toxicity is high, will fail to communicate their usual thoughts, let alone feelings. This will surely cause chaos in their personal life as well.

2. Unnecessary Anxiety

Children are very impressionable and when they are in toxic families where anxiety is a part of everyday life, they pick that up. This means that they constantly feel anxious and cannot stop themselves from worrying about things that don’t need worrying.

This is because as children, they were constantly worried about the family atmosphere and minor everyday things. Thus, that feeling stays with them forever and anxiety becomes a regular visitor.

Related: 10 Tips To Deal With Toxic Family Members Without Losing Your Mind

3. Gaslighting and Abuse Raise Reality Questions

As a member of a toxic family, your memories will surely differ from the memories of your parents. This means that a sad event will also be portrayed by your parents in a very happy and jovial manner. It will make you think that there is something wrong with your memory. As a result, you will even start questioning yourself and your identity. But beware of this.

What is happening with you is mere gaslighting. Now, in the version of your parents’, life has always been good and perfect. Don’t let this be your version. Stick to how you felt because you were there to feel it.

If you fail to stick to what you felt, you will fall into the trap of feeling that your very reality is in scrutiny. You will begin to question what is real and what is not. The repercussions of the same will be seen in your everyday life and even in the way you understand the world.

4. Relationships Suffer

We don’t even realize this but once a person goes through a negative family setup, they are marred forever. The family is usually the place where we put our trust and faith in for the first time. When we are not able to get that trust and faith back, the result is that we are afraid to put that trust into anyone else.

Also, when we feel that we have been created by our family, we start feeling that everyone around us is bound to cheat us. It becomes so very hard to instill that trust into someone again. Thus, all future relationships suffer. This is not only true for romantic relationships but it is also true for friendships.

Thus, the toxic family will leave an indelible imprint on the person’s mind. What can you do to reduce the pain?

• Talk to people or a therapist or anyone. Just talk it out.
• Focus more on yourself and your goals.
• Count your blessings. If you don’t have the love, shelter, and comfort of a family, you will surely have something else.
• Put yourself out in the world. More. This will help you deal with your problems much better.
• Trust more.
• Gather all the love that you get and celebrate it. You will get love, don’t worry.
• Have faith
• Don’t become all negative. Stay calm and positive. Look at the brighter side of things.
• Also, try to omit the bad memories and not by immersing yourself in alcohol. The only way to omit bad memories is to create new memories; happy ones.
• Love and laugh like there is no tomorrow.

Related: Why It’s Okay To Cut Toxic Family Members Out of Your Life

Maybe, the universe has been unkind to you but do the exact opposite. Be kind, love and enjoy whatever moments of happiness you have.

Kill the toxicity.

If you want to know more about the struggles of coming from a toxic family, then check this video out below:

The Minds Journal Articles Volume -1  is Copyright Protected vide Regd.# L-103222/2021 

4 Struggles Only People Who Come From Toxic Families Will Understand2
Struggles Only People From Toxic Families Pin

— Share —

— About the Author —


  1. Sharon Avatar

    As a survivor of being a member of a toxic family. I appreciate this well written piece. I appreciate reading articles that reinforce my boundary settings are acceptable and not selfishness. I agree that personal self care is of paramount importance.
    Thanks for your article

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

How To Deal With A Jealous Partner

How To Deal With A Jealous Partner: Practical Tips

Jealousy is a normal part of any romantic relationship and to some extent it can even be healthy. But when your partner becomes excessively jealous it can turn toxic. Let’s explore how to deal with a jealous partner and build a healthier relationship. 

Love and jealousy

It’s a tale as old as time – two individuals come together, in love and hopeful for the future, only for one person to find themselves troubled by the other’s past relationships or experiences. 

If this rings true for you, you’re dealing with what’s termed as “retroactive jealousy“. It can be painful, destructive, and truly challenging, especially if

Up Next

Orbiting Dating: The Trend That Keeps You From Moving On – Are You Guilty?

Orbiting Dating Trend: Eight Warning Signs To Look Out For

In the ever-evolving world of the dating scene, you might have heard of this new phenomenon: the orbiting dating trend. So, what exactly is it?

What Is Orbiting Dating Meaning?

Well, orbiting dating meaning is a bit like ghosting, but with a social media twist. Imagine this: you break off direct contact with someone you’ve been dating, but you continue to engage with their online presence.

Up Next

What Is Emotional Incest: Understanding The Hidden Dynamics and Its Impact On Relationships

What Is Emotional Incest? Signs And How To Heal

Do you know what is emotional incest? It may sound like a strange term, but it refers to a type of relationship dynamic that can have profound effects on individuals involved. 

How often have we heard someone say, “I am my mother’s confidante” or “My dad and I share everything”? While these statements may sound harmless, even commendable, they can sometimes point to a lesser-known and misunderstood psychological phenomenon – emotional incest or emotional incest syndrome.

Let’s  explore this often overlooked aspect of human relationships and find out the signs of emotional incest, effects of emotional incest and if healing from emotional incest is possible.

What is Emotional Incest?

Up Next

Can A Narcissist Be Faithful? 18 Reasons Why They Cheat (And Why They Don’t)

Can A Narcissist Be Faithful? Reasons They Can Be

Can a narcissist be faithful? This question delves into the intricate world of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and the complex dynamics of relationships involving narcissists. 

Understanding the psychology behind this topic is crucial for those who have encountered or are currently involved with narcissistic individuals. Let us explore the nature of narcissism, the reasons why a narcissist can be unfaithful, as well as the factors that might lead them to exhibit faithfulness. 

Can a Narcissist be Faithful in a Relationship?

Can a narcissist be faithful? This is a nuanced question and doesn’t really have a straightforward answer.

Up Next

What Is Parasitic Relationship? 9 Warning Signs and Their Devastating Impact on Your Life

What Is Parasitic Relationship? Nine Warning Signs To Watch For

Have you ever wondered how some relationships can drain the life out of you? Where one person benefits while the other suffers? Welcome to the intriguing world of parasitic relationships. Let’s explore what is parasitic relationship in humans and how to deal with it.

By understanding the dynamics and consequences of parasitic relationships, we can gain valuable insights into fostering healthier connections with others.

What is Parasitic Relationship?

A parasitic relationship in humans refers to an unbalanc

Up Next

What Is Zombieing In Dating? A Crueler Twist On Ghosting Explained

What Is Zombieing In Dating? Three Clear Ways To Deal With It

What is zombieing, you ask? Gone are the days when being ghosted was the ultimate dating nightmare because this new dating trend in town might just change your perspective.

Unlike the malicious “ghostlighting,” which is all about tormenting your dating past, zombieing is a bit more, let’s say, annoying.

So, what is zombieing in dating?

What is zombieng meaning, you ask? In dating refers to the unsettling phenomenon where someone who had previously ghosted you, abruptly cutting

Up Next

The Guilt Trap: Recognizing And Overcoming Guilt Tripping In Relationships

Guilt Tripping In Relationships: Signs And How To Deal

Have you ever felt trapped in a relationship where guilt seems to be the currency of control? Let’s discover what guilt tripping in relationships means and the signs of guilt tripping in a relationship to learn how to break free from this destructive manipulation.

What is guilt tripping in relationships?

Relationships are built on love, trust, and mutual respect. However, there are instances when one partner may resort to harmful tactics to control and manipulate the other. One such toxic behavior is guilt tripping