Have you been feeling lonely lately? Wondering how to make friends as an adult? Well, you should. Having some great friends makes life a lot easier.
According to a Journal of Health and Social Behavior report published in 2010, having great social bonds helps us live longer. It boosts our immune system and allows us to enjoy a more meaningful life. Moreover, studies have found that having strong friendships can help to reduce stress, chronic pain, the risk of heart disease and decrease high blood pressure. Wow! Having friends really does help!
“Since there is nothing so well worth having as friends, never lose a chance to make them.” – Francesco Guicciardini
A life without friends
“Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.” – Aristotle
The thing is making friends as an adult is not that simple. Things were a lot easier when we were kids. We could just walk up to a kid and ask them to be our friends. And voila! You’ve got a new BFF! But it doesn’t work like that when you’re an adult. Imagine going up to someone and asking them “will you be my friend?” Creep alert! But you are not alone in this dilemma. Most adults are looking to make some social connections and asking themselves how to make friends as an adult.
In fact, a study of over 177,000 people found that adult friendships tend to shrink and dwindle after the age of 25. Moreover, a national survey conducted in 1985 found that most adult respondents claimed they had only 3 friends. In 2004, that number dropped to zero. You read that right. ZERO! Zero friends.
As an adult, making friends is not just difficult, it can also be awkward and humiliating, especially if you are an introvert. The biggest challenge to build lasting friendships as an adult is that we are afraid of rejection. We are afraid of judgment. It’s not like how things were back in college where everyone would become our friends, even those who we didn’t want to be friends with. But as we grow older, we get bogged down with our career, marriage, taking care of kids, moving to a new city and other responsibilities. And soon, friendship only means a text on holidays and a birthday wish, thanks to Facebook Notifications.
Friendship equals happiness
“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.” – Linda Grayson
Did you know one of the biggest deathbed regrets of most people is that they wished they kept in touch with their friends? Unfortunately, this regret can come sooner for many of us. Researchers have found that having a dwindling social circle or not having enough close friends has similar risk factor as smoking a whopping 15 cigarettes per day. If you take good care of yourself, you can definitely live a long healthy life. However, if you want that life to be meaningful and enjoyable, then you need to start making some friends.
Relationships account for more than 70 percent of our happiness. Our relationship with our neighbors and coworkers, our closeness with our family and siblings, our closeness with our friends and even the number of our friends all determine the level of our personal happiness. Friendships are really important to our happiness and overall well being.
So if you are still trying to figure out how to make friends as an adult, then we have got you covered. Get ready to make some new BFFs!
7 awesome ways to make friends as an adult
“Blessed are they who have the gift of making friends, for it is one of God’s best gifts. It involves many things, but above all, the power of going out of one’s self, and appreciating whatever is noble and loving in another.” – Thomas Hughes
Making friends shouldn’t be difficult when you’re an adult. It should be simple and natural. Here are a few effective and excellent tips on how to make friends as an adult.
1. Get out there
Yes, you have responsibilities. Welcome to adulthood. But that doesn’t mean you will put yourself in the backseat and then forget all about it. Neglecting yourself, letting go of dreams, avoiding having fun and not enjoying life is definitely not the way to make friends. Although Netflix does sound perfect at the end of a tiring day, what you need to do is go out there and do things that you love. Pursue your passions and meet new people who are already doing what you love. You need to actively focus on building and enjoying your personal life first. Look at it this way, why would anyone want to be your friend if you are not an interesting person? So go out there and fun. Be your own best friend first and foremost. Happiness always begins with loving yourself.
“A man practices the art of adventure when he breaks the chain of routine and renews his life through reading new books, traveling to new places, making new friends, taking up new hobbies and adopting new viewpoints.” – Wilfred Peterson
2. Reconnect with old friends
Whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, I am pretty sure you had some friends back in school and college. Or they may be an ex-colleague or a neighbour from your hometown. Start by getting in touch with your old friends either through social media, emails or text. Or you might even call them up and ask to meet them. This is a lot easier and less scary than meeting new people. They are people you know. People you are comfortable with. People you already have a history with. Even though you haven’t been in touch for the last few years, you will immediately feel that connection and friendship the moment you start talking with your old pals.