How To Hurt A Narcissist, Like They Hurt You!

 / 

,
How To Hurt A Narcissist? Way To Get The Best Revenge

The aftermath of narcissistic pain is distressing. Here’s how to hurt a narcissist like they hurt you and reclaim control to find strength within!

If you want to hurt someone, you have to first know what they care about and what they’re afraid of. When you know what someone cares about, you can threaten to have it taken away. When you know what they’re afraid of, you can threaten to expose them to it.

So, what do Narcissists fear?

  1. Abandonment
  2. Exposure/ Having their carefully crafted reputation and false reality brought to light/Having the world know who and what they truly are/The truth
  3. Having their character smeared
  4. Being forgotten
  5. Loneliness
  6. Introspection

Read MY CLOSURE from a Narcissist

What do they care about?

  1. Having supply, people to admire them and give them attention
  2. Control
  3. Being important/special in some way
  4. The appearance of success
  5. The opinions of others
talk to a narcissist
How To Hurt A Narcissist, Like They Hurt You!

These are at the top of the list of what Narcissists want and fear most. 

They are, generally, what drives the majority of their behaviors.

Getting Revenge On A Narcissist: How To Hurt A Narcissist

When a person has been cruelly discarded by their narcissistic partner, it’s normal to have thoughts of revenge. The problem is that the normal rules of the universe don’t apply when you’re dealing with someone who has an impaired ability to feel empathy.

You can’t reach a narcissist the same way you reach other people. You can’t appeal to their sense of decency, or to their sense of right and wrong, or even to their heart.

To them, the right and wrong of any situation lie solely in what’s best for them and how they can obtain the best supply possible, everything else is collateral damage.

Read Why Is It So Hard to Leave the Narcissist in Your Life?

When you no longer serve as a source of narcissistic supply you are instantly an adversary. What is inexplicable to most, is the abruptness of their change in emotions. One minute they love you, the next you are enemy number one.

If you truly want to hurt a narcissist, leave them before they leave you. Walk away and don’t look back and live your best life. Ignore all their attempts at contact and go about your life as if they never existed.

If you are the one that is being left, agree with them wholeheartedly. Tell them they are absolutely right. You were going to end it too, but you were just waiting for the right time. Thank God they brought it up and act happy about it. Make no further contact and move on as quickly and happily as possible.

Easier said than done, you might be saying and you’re right. When you’ve been in a narcissistic relationship you’re confused, lost, heartbroken, and you’re likely, hanging on by a thread. You’re doing everything in your power not to be destroyed by the break-up and someone is telling you to act like you’re happy?

What’s the alternative? You could beg and plead for them to come back – you already know how that’s going to turn out. You could attempt to smear their character and expose them.

All that’s going to do is make you look like the crazy one. You could tell their new supply the truth about them, but you already know they’ve been fed a plateful of lies about you and your relationship and again you come off looking like the crazed one.

Read The Silent Treatment and No Contact…. What Are The Differences?

Any contact on your part, once they have discarded you, is seen as a weakness. It feeds their sadistic streak and they fill up on your suffering.  If they’ve already got someone else lined up, you are nothing but a burden to them at this point. They may even use you as a means of triangulation to ensnarl the new supply.

Everyone knows, you want what other people want and you feel special when you are the chosen one. Narcissists know this, they plan on it and use it to their advantage. They don’t care how you will feel about it, or how much it will kill you to see them with someone else. Once they have replaced you, there is nothing you can do to change their minds.

Read 10 Rules Of No Contact With A Narcissist

A Narcissist once told me that while he was walking through a mall, he saw a good-looking couple holding hands, laughing, and being affectionate.

It enraged him, he told me, because he wanted what they had, so badly, but he knew, deep down, that he would never have it. Seeing other people happy and in love infuriated him. He wanted to hurt them, to take away their happiness so that they would feel as empty and miserable as he did.

If you truly want to hurt your Narcissistic ex, heal yourself, find yourself, live, fall in love again and walk through that mall laughing and holding hands with someone else.

Did you enjoy reading the post on how to get revenge on a narcissist’s heart? Drop a comment below.


Written by Savannah Grey
Post originally appeared on Esteemology.com
Printed with permission
How to Emotionally Hurt A Narcissist, The Way They Hurt You
How To Hurt A Narcissist The Way They Hurt You? Best Revenge On A Narcissist
how to hurt back a narcissist pin
How To Get Revenge On A Narcissist?
how to hurt a narcissist
How To Hurt A Narcissist, Like They Hurt You!

— Share —

— About the Author —

Response

  1. Rebecca Davis Avatar
    Rebecca Davis

    I appreciate the article but I kinda wish how to walk away from a narcissist when a child or children are involved. Yes. I know they do not love there children they r simply a supply for various reasons. It’s a Good article.

Leave a Reply



Up Next

Are You The Scapegoat In A Narcissistic Family? 8 Scapegoat Roles

Scapegoat Of A Narcissistic Family? Types Of Scapegoats

Being the scapegoat of a narcissistic family is tough and confusing. You might feel like you are always the problem, no matter what you do. But did you know there are actually different types of family scapegoats? Yup, there are 8 distinct kinds, each with it’s own unique challenges.

But, who is a scapegoat really? When it comes a narcissistic family, there’s always that one person who is unfairly blamed and criticized for everything that goes wrong, even when it’s not their fault. They often bear the brunt of family abuse, feeling like they just can’t catch a break. That is who a scapegoat is.

Understanding the different types of narcissistic family scapegoats can help you make sense of your experiences and see that you are not alone. Whether you are the “truth-teller” who always speaks up or the “rebel” who refuses to conform, knowing your role and where



Up Next

10 Reasons Why Narcissists Never Grow Up Emotionally

Reasons Why Narcissists Never Grow Up Emotionally

Narcissists never grow up emotionally, and trying to deal with them can make you feel like you are dealing with a tantrum-throwing, difficult teenager. Have you ever wondered why some people just can’t seem to act their age, no matter how old they get? Yeah, you might be standing opposite a narcissist.

Narcissists are stuck in a cycle of immaturity that’s both fascinating and frustrating. Be it their constant need for attention or their severe lack of empathy, there’s a lot going on beneath the surface.

That’s why we are going to talk about one of the biggest reasons why they are the way they are. It’s because narcissists never grow emotionally. But why narcissists never grow up? What are the reasons behind their emotionally stunted psyche?

Let’s find out!



Up Next

How To Forgive Narcissistic Parents: 8 Ways To Heal And Move Forward

How To Forgive Narcissistic Parents: Tips To Find Healing

Dealing with narcissistic parents is tough, and trying to forgive them for the way they have treated you can feel impossible and unfair, especially if they are not sorry for their actions. So, how to forgive narcissistic parents?

Forgiving narcissistic parents is important for your own mental and emotional well-being. Always remember that you are not alone, and there are ways to find peace and healing, even when they don’t change.

Today, we are going to help you navigate the tricky waters of forgiveness, offering 8 practical steps to heal and move forward. Whether you are still struggling with past trauma or dealing with your parents now, be rest assured, these tips can help you feel empowered.

So, are you ready to start? Let’s go!



Up Next

11 Effects Of A Narcissistic Parent on Their Children: Parenting Poison

Effects Of A Narcissistic Parent: Parenting Poison

Growing up with a narcissistic parent can leave deep scars that shape who you become. The effects of a narcissistic parent can sneak into every part of your life, from how you see yourself to how you connect with others.

If you have ever felt like you’re constantly seeking approval, struggling to set boundaries, or dealing with a never-ending fear of abandonment, then you are not alone. These are just a few ways narcissistic parents damage their children.

Today, we are going to explore how it feels to be children of narcissistic parents and the damage they cause.

Related:



Up Next

Romantic Manipulation: 10 Subtle Phrases To Watch Out For

Romantic Manipulation: Sneaky Phrases That Signal Trouble

Romantic manipulation is sneaky, and it can creep into a relationships without either person fully realizing it. We have all heard those phrases that sound sweet or caring but leaves a bitter aftertaste, making us second-guess our feelings.

Manipulative partners often have a way with words, twisting them to control or belittle. So, are you curious to know the signs of romantic manipulation, and the things manipulative partners say?

Whether you’re navigating your own love life, or just looking out for your friends, this article will help you spot the subtle signs of emotional trickery. So, are you ready to dive in?

Related:



Up Next

Are Narcissists Born Or Made? Let’s Settle The Debate Once And For All

Are Narcissists Born Or Made? Important Things To Know

Are narcissists born or made? Delve into the age-old debate as we explore whether nature or nurture shapes this complex personality trait. Uncover the secrets behind pathological narcissism!

Narcissists can be hard to empathize with, but research on inherited narcissism shows they didn’t choose to be that way; they bear scars from childhood.

Traditionally, childrearing, particularly by the mother, was considered the cause of narcissism. In recent years, more research and twin studies have also looked at genetic factors.



Up Next

8 Major Reasons You’re Attracted to Narcissists and How to Break the Cycle

Attracted to Narcissists? Here Are Revealing Reasons Why

How many time have you found yourself irresistibly drawn to someone who seemed perfect at first but turned out to be a self-absorbed narcissist? Well, you’re not alone. There are a surprising number of us who keep getting pulled into the orbit of these charismatic, but toxic individuals. But why are we attracted to narcissists?

Whether it’s their initial charm, their confidence, or something deeper within you, the reasons you are attracted to narcissists are as fascinating, as they are frustrating.

Today, we are going to answer the age-old question “why do I attract narcissists?”, find out more about why this keeps on happening and also talk about how to stop attracting narcissists.