You’ve been used, you’ve been abused, you’ve been exploited, and no matter how much you rack your brains, there seems to be no end to it. And the worst thing about all this is that you always tend to attract narcissists. But why are you a narcissist magnet?
Being in one abusive relationship after the other can take a toll on your mental health, and make you wonder what is it about you that always attracts narcissists. You also constantly wonder why are you attracted to narcissists? But you know what? It’s not your fault. It’s not that you’re actively seeking out narcissists to be with.
Maybe you are an empath, and that’s why narcissists flock to you; it is common knowledge that empaths attract narcissists. Narcissists are always on the lookout for good, kind, and compassionate people because they know they can exploit their compassion and manipulate them.
But why do empaths attract narcissists? What are the traits that attract narcissists really?
4 Traits of A Narcissist Magnet
1) You have a compassionate, kind, and big heart,
You’re a compassionate and trusting person and that is one of the biggest reasons you are a narcissist magnet. You have a big and open heart, and for you, love comes before self-respect. Your love knows no bounds which is a good thing. Narcissists always want to be with someone like that, because this is the perfect source of narcissistic supply for them.
However, you need to have healthy boundaries. There are times you need to stand up for yourself. You need to have faith in yourself, and you need to love yourself so that others can’t exploit you nor can they put you down. Narcissists are really bad people, and you don’t deserve to have their negativity in your life.
2) You feel inadequate and suffer from a lack of determination.
The narcissists’ abuse makes you feel small and worthless and you end up loathing yourself. You’re broken and you cannot even look within yourself for help. You wander around seeking support and validation and fall prey to the narcissist awaiting vulnerable prey like you because they love it when you question yourself constantly.
They take advantage of your emotions. It can be online, within your family, or a part of any circle. Don’t let anyone affect your self-esteem. Consult a trustworthy, non-judgmental therapist for the emotional abuse you have suffered. Give yourself time and let the wounds heal. Know that you can survive this on your own.
It may seem tough and impossible now, but let me tell you, you will get there. Treat yourself with the same compassion and kindness you treat others.
3) You have a lot of suppressed pain and anger within you.
Being in an abusive relationship can naturally cause a lot of unresolved anger and trauma in a victim. Due to all the cheating, lying, humiliation, and psychological manipulation, there is a lot of resentment in you. Just as you are trying your best to resolve all that, in comes the narcissist with some fresh negativity and trauma.
You serve as the perfect narcissist magnet for them because mentally and emotionally you are still recovering, and for them, this is the perfect opportunity to manipulate you and destroy you once more.
The only way out of their trap is to practice forgiveness and self-compassion. As you learn forgiveness, acceptance, and indifference you will slowly start to release the old betrayals and open your heart again. This is when you discover the deep pain hiding behind the veil of anger.
The more you get in touch with your inner child, the stronger you will get. The more you love yourself, the less the narcissist will be able to manipulate you.
4) You suffer from low confidence and low self-worth.
Long after the abuse has ended, you feel loathsome and unworthy. There is a belief that you’re not enough and you go on seeking validation and go on trying to please people. In every sphere of your life, you struggle to prove yourself and look for others’ approval and this is where you fall prey again.
This ends up attracting toxic people in your life, who are only interested in using you and hurting you. Women who attract narcissists tend to have low self-esteem, which is why it is easier for narcissists to play them.
You need to understand your own worth, in order to stop being a narcissist magnet. You are worthy. You are good enough. You are strong. You are capable. And most importantly, you deserve true love. The more you believe these truths and internalize them, the stronger and more confident you will get.
Self-love is the only solution. No relationship or job can fill the void. Once we start loving ourselves these wounds will heal. Once we realize we are fine the way we are and we don’t need to do anything to be loved, we regain our long-lost self-confidence. We feel at peace again.
When we do these things we meet ourselves again. We realize nothing but the question ‘what is wrong with me?’ was the problem. We start to brighten up again, regain our sense of humor, and realize that the love and confidence we were missing were always there inside our hearts.
Do you know of any other traits of a Narcissist Magnet? Let us know your thoughts in the comments down below!