Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single and Not in Relationships


Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single

Being single is a blessing and not a curse for some people. Although most of us desire a meaningful and lasting relationship, some prefer being single and enjoy the independence that comes with it. This is more true for empaths. Although empaths are known to be sensitive, intuitive, selfless, forgiving, and compassionate people who develop deep connections, most of them prefer staying single. Read on to know why empaths stay single or prefer to stay single.

“As empaths, our high level of sensitivity means that we are prone to feeling like eternal outsiders who are in the world but not quite of the world.” – Aletheia Luna

Empaths and relationships can often be the perfect recipe for a catastrophic disaster. In case you are not up to speed, empaths have an innate capacity to deeply understand others. They can easily absorb and get affected by the energies, emotions, thoughts, and actions of the people they are with.

Read short poem about empaths. I am an empaths. I am a healer
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

As empaths can easily pick up on the energy that flows between two individuals, whether consciously or subconsciously, this makes relationships more profound and complicated for them.

They can absorb the energy and vibrations of their partner and may feel overwhelmed, anxious, overloaded, and exhausted. Oftentimes, empaths deliberately avoid relationships as they are afraid of getting too involved in and consumed by the relationship. Hence, often empaths stay single.

Read: When An Empath Loves A Narcissist, This Is How It Ends

Empaths and relationships: Why empaths stay single?

Every empath is sensitive to emotions and energies that surround them, whether from people, animals, or anything else. Not only can they intuitively understand the thoughts & feelings of other people, empaths can also understand their mental, physical and emotional state accurately.

Talking about empath relationships, they usually develop a deep connection with people close to them either during healing or physical intimacy. As they open their hearts and their energies become vulnerable, outside energies can easily seep in and merge with their own.

“The Empath is often said to have such a great degree of empathy that they can literally feel what others feel, and thus intuitively know many of the yearnings, sensitivities, tastes and even thought patterns of the people they’re around.” – Aletheia Luna

Empaths are often left feeling overstimulated and fatigued as they are highly attuned to vibrations and energy, especially when they absorb it from someone they love and care about. This can lead to a number of complications in a romantic relationship. Moreover, empaths also need a lot of personal space, independence, and alone time to recharge and re-energize themselves, which might be difficult for their partners to understand.

Read the curse of being an empath and why empaths stay single or prefer to be alone.
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

Interestingly, empaths love profoundly and become deeply involved when they are in a relationship as they value deep and meaningful connections. However, being deeply intimate and close to someone can make them experience burnout fairly easily. Highly sensitive empaths often give a lot more to the relationship than they receive and this can make them feel emotionally bankrupt.

Relationships are complicated as it is. However, the chances of the relationship lasting become exceptionally low when an empath is involved. This is perhaps one of the biggest reasons why empaths, who are mostly introverts, prefer to be single.

From emotional investment to broken trust: Love is never easy

Empaths can feel things way before they actually find out things. Read why empaths stay single.
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

Figuring out people is an easy task for empaths thanks to their highly attuned intuitive senses. They can easily decipher the characteristics, motivations, emotions, and intentions of others that might be kept hidden. However, when they are emotionally involved with someone, their intuitive skills often fail and they ignore their instincts and inner voice. Their strong emotions for their romantic partner can easily cloud an empath’s judgment and intuitive senses.

Perhaps this is one of the biggest reasons empaths often find themselves in dysfunctional and toxic relationships and develop unhealthy attachments with their partner. And this is why they become easy targets for narcissists who prey on an empath’s caring and healing nature. 

“Empaths did not come into this world to be victims, we came to be warriors. Be brave. Stay strong. We need all hands on deck.” – Anthon St. Maarten

Read: 9 Tips For Empaths in a Relationship

Empaths and relationships almost never work out. When they fall victim to a narcissistic partner and get gaslighted, they may find it difficult to trust their own instincts. They start doubting their own intuitive abilities and tend to accept their partner’s version of the truth. And this is where the cracks start to surface.

An empath may choose to stay with their partner even after their trust breaks and willingly open themselves up to further emotional pain. This is why do empaths stay with narcissists even after emotional torture. But they will enclose themselves inside a protective mental barrier. When trust in the relationship starts to break, empaths will get curious and constantly ask questions to their partners to get the answers they need. And soon the relationship starts to fade away as they feel increasingly unloved and unappreciated.

Both empaths and narcissists suffer from early developmental trauma. Read short poem by Rohit Barman on The Minds Journal
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

Relationships can be damaging & detrimental

“As highly sensitive empaths, we are particularly prone to experiencing the Dark Night of the Soul. The less defined our sense of self is and the more toxic energy we take on from others, the more we are prone to losing touch with our Souls.” – Aletheia Luna

Being exceptionally compassionate souls with extraordinary abilities for forgiveness, acceptance, and understanding, empaths can often give too many chances to toxic partners. This may lead to some seriously harmful behavior in the relationship. They can also experience abuse in relationships if their loving nature is perceived as a weakness. This can lead to depression, anxiety, reduced sense of self-worth, and low self-esteem as the empath partner starts absorbing the negative energies of the abusive partner.

Being natural healers, empaths are usually attracted to people who are emotionally wounded and need to be healed. As they absorb their partner’s emotional pain, the empath begins to function at the low vibration that their partner is in. As their wounded partner becomes dependent on the empath for healing and validation, the empath becomes dependent on the other partner to feel worthy, important, and needed.

Empaths feel distance, doubt, and change to a different degree. Why empaths stay single?
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

Falling out of love can be easy too

“As an empath, it’s vital that you learn how to hold space for your emotions, even the most painful ones. By anchoring yourself in your breath, you can learn how to witness the emotional energy of others within you, without attaching yourself to these sensations.” – Mateo Sol

Absorbing both high and low high vibrational energies from others means that empaths can get intensely attached and completely detached from someone easily. They can effortlessly disconnect from relationships and emotions as soon they are away from their partner. The moment they end a relationship or get separated, an empath will lose the connection regardless of how strong the bonding was. They can easily and instantly walk away without feeling any negative emotions.

Read: The Empath And The Wounded Narcissist: Toxic Dynamics Explained

Although it can seem cold and heartless, it is mostly instinctive and unintentional. This is one of the main reasons why empaths prefer to be alone or stay away from relationships as they know how intoxicating and contagious someone’s energy can be. They can also hate playing mind games in relationships and can easily see know when someone is pretending or being fake. 

why empaths stay single
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

They have a strong disgust for psychological games as empaths are extremely loving and caring individuals who wear their hearts on their sleeves. Moreover, being human lie detectors, they can spot when someone is being disloyal and unfaithful from a mile away. This is extremely infuriating and frustrating for empaths and can lead to a complete breakdown of the relationship.

Empaths learn and evolve from relationship to relationship and eventually lose the desire for companionship in order to protect their emotional and mental wellbeing. 

Empaths are highly emotional beings

Empaths and relationships never work out. Something always goes wrong. Whether being too sensitive or emotional or getting attached to a toxic partner, an empath usually fails to experience the type of love and relationship he/she wants in life.

“It is so important for us as empaths to maintain a sense of connectedness with life. When we put up walls to protect ourselves, we end up exhausting, victimizing, and alienating ourselves. It is far more satisfying, effective, and healthy to work with our gifts, rather than against them.” – Aletheia Luna

They are usually vulnerable and mostly think of their hearts. When sharing their deepest feelings, an empath will be raw, honest, and open. But their partners can often get uncomfortable with such brutal honesty and depth in communication. As they fail to communicate their truest and darkest feelings with their partners, empaths withdraw and choose to keep their thoughts and emotions to themselves.

As a result, they become broken, bitter, and disheartened. Most empaths eventually lose hope of ever meeting their soulmates and experiencing a genuine connection with a partner who feels as deeply as they do. Emotional trauma, abuse, and toxic relationship experiences are often the primary reasons why an empath wants to stay single rather than being in an unfulfilling relationship.

Self-awareness is the key 

empath affirmation - excerpts from The Empath's Survival Guide.
Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single And Not In Relationships

When an empath becomes aware that they absorb external energies and that low vibrational energies can leave them feeling drained and fatigued, empaths will consciously tread carefully in relationships. Self-awareness will help them significantly reduce their chances of taking in toxic energies that can mess with their own vibrations.

“The sad thing that many of us empaths don’t realize is that often our desire to heal others is a disguised cry for help for our own healing. Because many of us weren’t taught how to value or nurture ourselves at a young age, we tend to unconsciously seek out our own healing in the healing of others.” – Mateo Sol

Read: 12 Reasons Why Empaths Have a Hard Time Finding True Love

Self-protection and self-love can enable empaths to maintain their level of energy, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. As they refuse to absorb lower vibrational energy, they will be able to create a healthy and harmonious life for themselves. An empath needs to stay alone and desperately need their alone time as they first need to heal themselves before they can think about others, especially after a broken relationship.

Staying single is perhaps the best way for an empath to build a meaningful, happy, and fulfilling relationship.

Why Empaths Prefer To Stay Single and Not in Relationships
Why Empaths Stay Single And Not In Relationships
why empaths stay single
Why Empaths Stay Single And Not In Relationships

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  1. Ivy Avatar

    Interesting article. In my experience as an empath who has attracted her share of narcissists in the past. I worked allot on my shadow while alone, healed from my traumas so I didn’t need to continue attracting destructive patterns by learn lessons. The outcome; a fulfilling loving relationship, one in which we both grow as separate individuals and together..& oh, he happens to be an empath too! 😉

    1. Epiphany Avatar

      This article is me. Being an empath has made me be a wonderful mother and friend but also causes me alot of mental pain. Most people do not understand me and view me as overly sensitive and too emotional. It takes me ten times longer to recover from negative things because I absorb them so deeply that I have to recover from a lower mental state than most. I feel that being an empath is a very sad existence because we are consumed by our own and others emotional state.

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