3 Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person and What You Can Do About It

 / 

signs you are turning into a bitter person and what you can do about it

If you’ve landed up on this page, it is likely that you’re curious about your consistent state of discontent or you’re someone willing to dig deep, modify and acknowledge it. Read on to know the signs that you have become a bitter person and what you can do about it.

Bitterness, and mind you I say this as a person who’s been there, is as experiential as it can get. It doesn’t really matter how much you possess in life or how much you have lost. This context isn’t very dissimilar from happiness.

Ever heard of the saying “happiness is an inside job”?

Well, bitterness too is a bit like that and by saying this, I, in no way mean that they aren’t valid feelings.

When I fell into the grasps of “it” a few years ago, not knowing my life’s purpose, feeling like i was changing more rapidly than I could keep up with.

The first time I was able to overtly articulate, I described “it” as something like this: an entourage of heavy clouds rising from the pit of my stomach, spreading inside of my body and soul, poisoning every inch of my being. Soon enough, I was feeling vexed and frustrated all the time, at everybody and at everything.

Happiness is your nature.
3 Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person And What You Can Do About It

It took me a while to realise that this onset had been an insidious process. Perhaps a slow coming out of and a slow-growing into something else. Initially, I didn’t track it for weeks, as it spread through me, dripping ever so slowly into my consciousness that I could easily pass it off as another bad day.

Read The Key To Rediscovering Inner Happiness Based On Your Zodiac Sign

However, you can imagine what happens when the bad days add up. Even when you are backed up with compassionate and genuine friends, an inherently enriching work, understanding and satisfying interpersonal relationships or talents that can get you places- none of these things matter anymore when bitterness begins to grasp you.

Now the question is,

How do you know you’re becoming bitter?

I didn’t know or even attempt to stop and look for almost two or three months, as it was happening.

What signs should you then look out for?

Here are signs you are turning into a bitter person

1. The grudges keep building

Bitterness has a lingering feel to it. You want to enjoy a drink with your coworkers but all you can think of is how one of them shortchanged you in a petty political game at a recent meeting.

You’re with your mother over the weekend watching a film after ages, but all your thoughts are directed to the one time she should have apologized the way you’d expected it.

The instances that I just cited are in no way uncommon. Coworkers can act as backstabbers and mothers become the imperfect figures we don’t want them to be, but here’s the fact : you get over these instances either by talking about them or by reassessing what can or can’t happen or even by thrashing it out with your therapist.

With bitterness setting in, that’s not how it works. You’ll mull over it and sit on it, without perhaps even lifting a finger and doing something about it.

Read 30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

At times it also feels like home; you refuse to give it up at any cost.

2. The anger won’t subside

Another master sign you are turning into a bitter person. I remember that time when one day my partner had passingly mentioned how he’s not able to find his favorite mug in the kitchen. This was right in the middle of my bitter phase and the mention of something so innocuous had my hair standing.

Always use your anger wisely.
3 Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person And What You Can Do About It

I remember having experienced an inordinate amount of anger and the trail of thoughts was never-ending, “he’s actually telling me I am at fault”, “he’s always giving these subtle hints”, “what have I gotten myself into?” “Decision to be with such a person is my own stupidity”, “Damn, I can’t even do one thing properly.”

It’ll probably not take much for you to see where this is heading. It is a guilt trip, an accusation trip, a bile trip, all of it, all at once. In a different state, you might be able to look at the situation at hand and say, “Ok, let’s see what to do about this”

With bitterness setting in, you feel far from that place.

3. The conversations won’t happen

As a bitter person, you’ll find it earth-shatteringly difficult to talk about what’s happening. Even with the people you know really well. Especially with the people you know really well.

Intentionally or unintentionally, they may say or do something that doesn’t sit with you, but you’ll not call any of it out. If you’re reading this piece, you might already know that bitterness can be a lump in the throat. You can’t get rid of it and you can’t gulp it in. It sits there, tight and unrelenting.

You sit with it, sulking, angry, complaining, even though you know talking about it might ease at least part of the weight.

So you might now see how each point resonates, but then what after it?

Is there a way to meet bitterness head on?

Read 12 Truths About Defensive Behavior

4 Ways To Handle Your Bitterness

Personally, after the initial phase, I began to cultivate the patience of taking care of my bitterness. This involved doing a number of things that I’ll now talk about.

1. Go into a dialogue with yourself

As someone who’s been bitter and seen bitter people, I know one thing – the basic answers almost always lie within ourselves.

The burning bile I experienced during those days of unending bitterness suggested to me that I could at least talk to myself, if not anybody else,that I could contemplate about what possibly is causing the misery.

In my own experience as well as that of witnessing others who have been through similar experiences, one emerging insight is – anything unresolved could potentially become the cause of bitterness.

2. Take responsibility

Take responsibility for your own betterment
3 Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person And What You Can Do About It

Every time I have experienced myself as a bitter person, I have held someone else responsible for it. It has been family, neighbors, the political state of the country.

In that state, I have often and successfully so, projected all internal disharmony on to other people. As a corollary again, I’d say it’s not like people are not to blame. Rather, it is an opportunity to see what you can possibly change about yourself.

Instead of holding on to the bitterness you must try to spit it out. By doing this, you can take back the power for yourself.

3. Express it in “safe” ways

At the peak of purposelessness, the bitterness I felt took extreme shapes.

I wanted to hit out, lash out, do anything but to feel that way. When I found a way to work with my bitter feelings, I saw the need for “safe” expression.

And so began the crazy drawings, the incessant use of black and other heavy colors, the scratching and scrawling with the pen, using words exactly as I wanted in my private journal. I found words to describe my state and this led me to also open up conversations with other people.

This was a initial phase of self expression which helped me loosen up and be open to other possibilities of expressing my bitterness like talking it out.

Read 100+ Eckhart Tolle’s Quotes To Help You Power Through Life

4. Work it out with your therapist

If you’re already seeing someone who can hold a mirror for you, you have the support you need. I don’t have to tell you that this is perhaps one of the safest ways to work through your bitterness.

As someone who practices expressive arts therapy and someone who has perhaps seen the entire gamut of bitter feelings, I am surprised by how this subject is often handled. There is harshness, critical judgment and a lot of distancing and retrospection of what could really be causing bitterness.

If you’re reading this, please know that owning it and acknowledging it is perhaps the first steps to ultimate relief. You can always find a way to come out of the vicious cycle of bitterness.

3 Signs You Maybe Turning Into A Bitter Person
signs you are turning into a bitter person and what you can do about it pin
Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person And What You Can Do About It
signs you are turning into a bitter person and what you can do about it pin
Signs You Are Turning Into A Bitter Person And What You Can Do About It

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply



Up Next

8 Signs A Man Is The Source Of His Own Misery: Self-Sabotaging Behaviors

Signs A Man Is The Source Of His Own Misery: Self-Sabotage

Ever wonder why he’s always gloomy and unhappy? These 8 signs reveal how he might be the source of his own misery, with self-sabotaging behaviors being an obstacle his own path to happiness.

Self-sabotage is often the biggest obstacle to happiness.

Self-sabotaging behaviors, negative mindsets, and the absence of emotional intelligence can unknowingly pave the path to a cycle of unhappiness. While external circumstances influence our success and well-being, the biggest obstacles to happiness are often found within.



Up Next

15+ Dress for Success Quotes to Boost Your Confidence and Inspire Your Life

Dress For Success Quotes To Inspire Confidence In Life

What we wear isn’t just about fashion—it’s a reflection of our mindset and ambition. Take a look at some of the “dress for success quotes” to influence confidence and, ultimately, success!

As fashion icon Edith Head once said, “You can have anything you want in life if you dress for it.” We also believe that there is a powerful link between self-presentation and professional outcomes.

So, whether you put on a well-tailored suit showing authority or groom yourself that exudes creativity, fashion communicates a message to the world about who you are and what you



Up Next

8 Tips To Step Into Your Power And Thrive

Tips To Step Into Your Power And Thrive

Did you know that negativity can significantly hold you back in your life and prevent you from reaching your goals? However, it isn’t always easy to step into your power and transform your life.

Without doing so, though, you can’t expect to ever achieve your potential. Let’s take a look at some of the key transformation tips that you can leverage.

8 Tips To Help You Step Into Your Power

1. Learn to Let Go

Holding onto the past is one of the most common things that people do that prevents them from moving forward in their lives. If you want to transform your life, it is essential that you le



Up Next

How To Talk To Anyone With Confidence? 14 Psychological Hacks For Any Situation

How To Talk To Anyone With Confidence? Fun Tricks

Do you ever wonder how to talk to anyone with confidence? Small talk may be intimidating at times but it is an ability that everyone can learn – the art of conversation!

Be it a party, a romantic date, or an office environment; one can use certain psychological tips that will help with the process and make it even more fun.

So, if you have trouble finding the right things to say, or are always in the corner of a gathering, here is how to talk to people and participate actively in different social settings with confidence.



Up Next

Why It’s So Hard to Admit You’re Wrong: 7 Surprising Psychological Barriers You Didn’t Know About

Why Is It So Hard To Admit To Being Wrong? Psychological Reasons You Need To Know

Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a heated debate, feeling that gnawing sensation that you might be wrong, but don’t want to admit it? Or maybe you are watching someone double down on their stance, even when all evidence points to the contrary, and wondering, “Why can’t they just say they’re wrong?” It’s a common scenario that plays out in classrooms, workplaces, and even family dinners, leaving many of us puzzled about why it is so hard to admit to being wrong.

Admitting we’re wrong isn’t just about swallowing our pride. For some people, admitting an error feels like a failure on a personal level, thus threatening their self-esteem and identity. Others worry about being judged and what consequences may follow. It’s not stubbornness alone, but this innate fear of exposure and vulnerability that makes it hard to



Up Next

10 Fun Activities To Spark Creativity In Kids

How To Improve Creativity In Kids? Fun Activities

Nothing makes a child happier than the opportunity to speak their minds. This is why parents and teachers need to know how to improve creativity in kids since it is one of the most essential skills they should have.

This will enable them to develop an inquisitive mind and pave their own way of learning by learning and exploring.

So below are some creative activities for kids to do and how we can support them in enhancing this superpower!

Why Is Creativity So Important?

Creativity is not just about painting a masterpiece or writing a novel; it’s about thinking outside the box, finding new solutions to problems, and expressing oneself uniquely.



Up Next

7 Situations Where You Should Stay Silent (Even If You Don’t Want To)

Situations Where You Should Stay Silent At All Costs!

Have you ever realized that being quiet might sometimes be the smartest thing to do? That’s right – there are 7 situations where you should stay silent in life, not because you fear speaking, but because it simply means gaining control over your own actions and thoughts.

Sometimes, silence is indeed golden. It can save you from unnecessary drama, stop a fight from growing worse, or even make you seem more knowledgeable and composed than you really are.

This is not about being scared to voice your opinions; it’s about knowing why you should remain