It is not always possessiveness or protectiveness, when it comes to a romantic partner. He might simply be manipulating you in the name of love.
Humans have used, abused, and manipulated each other since the dawn of mankind. That’s how great kingdoms were built and also brought down. Manipulation is a shady trick and it is openly performed in the veil of something sweet and bright.
We often tend to be protective about our partner in a relationship to an extent, but there are times when that protectiveness becomes manipulation. Learning to decipher this shady trick is best in the interest of your sanity and emotions.
15 Signs He Is Manipulating You And Not Protecting You
1. He claims to know what is best for you.
You’re an adult and every adult has the power to make their own decisions, but he constantly makes you feel that you need his guidance to make the right choices.
He always claims to know you better and what is in your best interest, by robbing you of the opportunity to make your own decisions.
2. He keeps on bringing up your past.
Everyone makes a bad decision and everyone at some point fails, and that is how life works. No one is perfect.
He keeps on bringing up your past to prove that you do make wrong decisions and he is ‘worried’ about you repeating the same mistakes again.
Want to know more about how he is manipulating you? Read 13 Signs You Have A Dangerously Possessive Boyfriend or Girlfriend
3. He keeps whining about time.
You have a life and your own responsibilities and there are times you want to live your life on your own. But whenever you have a plan or are working a lot, he starts complaining about how you would spend more time with him if you really cared enough.
4. He gets clingy in the presence of other men.
If you are at a party or in any event, and when other men tend to compliment you, he becomes overly jealous.
The presence of any other man is simply unacceptable for them. It will trigger the insecurity in him and he begins to monopolize you by constantly clinging onto you.
5. He doesn’t like you spending time with anyone else.
Love often makes one possessive but we do know what that love does to one. Every time you are out with someone to be it, friend, or family, he keeps texting you and asks you to come home early. This may sound protectiveness but is actually manipulation.
Looking to know more about how he might be manipulating you in the guise of love? Read 5 Hidden Signs, Your Good Guy Is Actually Manipulating You
6. He is always criticizing you.
Love is supposed to make you a better person and criticism does that for a while but only if it is constructive criticism.
But if someone keeps reminding you how you could have always done things better without any appreciation it’s not constructive criticism, but control.
7. He boasts about his wisdom.
Maybe at some point, you didn’t listen to him and it turned out he was right, get ready now, he is not going to forget this. It will be used repeatedly to remind you of his wisdom and also how bad you are making good decisions.
8. He makes over threats.
If he to leave or harm himself if you don’t do something he asks for, it’s time you leave. That is not loving, that is madness and they are two very different things. Constant threats are nothing but manipulation to make you do what they desire.
9. He constantly asks you to stay away from other men.
While a little jealousy is typical and sweet, if your partner asks you to steer clear from co-workers, college mates, or ANY men it’s a bad sign, he is taking it too far, trying to own you.
10. He makes his efforts known.
A relationship is all about putting efforts, including the silent efforts but he lets you and everyone else know how protective and caring he is. Every time you are out with friends he keeps texting and asking them when you will be home.
He keeps reminding you of how he did ‘this and that’ for you in the past.
11. He wants you to be with him all the time.
Everybody needs some ‘me’ time, the time spent in solitude to recharge oneself and introspect. If he doesn’t respect your ‘me’ time and wants you to be with you always, it’s not sweet or protective, it’s manipulation. It’s time to move on.
12. Your opinion doesn’t matter.
Not only does he think that he is wiser than you and makes the best decisions, but your opinions don’t matter at all. Often you’re not even asked before making a choice or decision on your behalf.
Want to know more about how he is manipulating you? Read 7 Signs You Are Being Manipulated By A Narcissist
13. He is never satisfied, let alone pleased.
You put in efforts to make him happy but no matter what you do and how you do it, there is always something missing for him.
There is always something you could have done better. All your efforts and love, it is just never enough for him.
14. He wants to make all your decisions.
He already feels that his decisions are superior and best for you.
Every time you go to him with a problem, he has a solution and no matter your consent he will go ahead and force his decision on you.
15. He thinks he is the only one who can make you happy.
This may sound like a good thing but do you realize that he is trying to limit your happiness to only him?
Every time someone else or something makes you happy he feels insecure and jealous. He wants to be the only thing that makes you happy and smile.