10 Signs He’s Just Using You and Is Not Genuine

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Signs He’s Just Using You and Is Not Genuine

Sustaining a relationship can prove to be a challenge at times, and no matter how many problems crop up, you might end up ignoring them because you want it to last. There comes a point when you need to sit back and judge whether the man you are dating genuinely loves you, or is simply using you.

Everyone want’s a man who will love them sincerely, will be there for them, and be loyal. Unfortunately not every man is built this way, and there are several men out there who will treat their partners badly, and simply use them as long as it pleases them. They might seem perfect in the beginning, but that’s not what the real truth is.

With the passage of time, they reveal their true colors when someone starts loving them blindly and fails to notice that their love is not genuine and that they are just using you for their own selfish needs.

Here Are 10 Signs That Say He Is Just Using You

(1) He doesn’t care about your emotions.

He’s always thinking about himself and doesn’t bother if you are hurt or upset by his behavior or actions. If you try to convey your feelings, he will react in such a way that you will feel you shouldn’t be thinking along those lines. Whenever you will try to talk to him about how his actions hurt you, he will twist the whole conversation, make it about himself, and portray him as the victim.

The sad part is that he knows exactly what he is doing, but he will always manipulate you and your emotions, and make you dance to his tunes. Your emotions are not important for him, and they never were.

(2) He just contacts you when he needs favors.

He always gets in touch with you when he needs any sort of help, be it financial or something else. Of course, you can always ask your partner for support but if that’s the only reason he calls you while ignoring you the rest of the time, then that definitely means he is just using you. True love is not just about asking favors and then disappearing.

You know a guy is using you when he behaves like the best boyfriend ever when he needs something from you, but the moment everything’s done and dusted, you will not find him anywhere; he has gone MIA. Again.

Related: To The Woman Who Gave Too Much Of Herself To The Wrong Guy

(3) He’s always “busy” and avoids going out on dates together.

Life might be busy at times, but a relationship also needs to be nurtured. No matter how busy you might be, you can still find time for your loved ones, if you genuinely love them, that is. It’s not really an impossible thing to do. So, when the guy you are dating tends to ghost you for days, and claims that he is just “busy”, know that he is simply not interested in spending time with you.

When you really love someone you will always try to find time for them, and if your man is not doing that, then he is just using you. Giving your partner time is one of the most important parts of a relationship, so if you are not getting that, it’s a huge red flag.

(4) He never introduces you to his friends or family.

He might have met your friends and family, but strangely, you have never met his. Whenever you broach this topic with them and tell him that you want to meet his loved ones, he either tries to avoid it or gets irritated very fast. Or he might tell you that he will make plans accordingly, and end up never go through with them.

Meeting your partner’s friends and family is an important step, so when he is not working towards that, know that you are in the wrong relationship with the wrong person.

(5) He never talks about commitment.

A man who is not serious about you avoids topics like engagement or marriage. When you are in a healthy relationship, it’s a very normal thing to talk about your future commitments with your significant other, be it long term goals or short term goals. When he doesn’t participate in all this and behaves negatively whenever you bring up these things, know that he is not at all serious about you.

He also never expresses his love because he doesn’t love you truly. Having genuine feelings for someone looks different, and is always very clear, but when you don’t, that also shows in their attitude and behavior.

Related: Finding a Good Guy: Top 10 Qualities To Look For In A Man

(6) His mood fluctuates all the time.

Sometimes he’s in love you and at other times, he just doesn’t want to talk to you. If his mood fluctuates all the time, remember that it’s a red alert. He only expresses love when he needs something from you or he needs you to do something for him. He’s always guided by his own moods and doesn’t care at all about your moods and needs.

You never feel heard and safe in your relationship, and most of the time you feel apprehensive and scared of saying the wrong thing to him which will make him lose this temper. It’s as if you don’t even exist. 

(7) Your peers tell you that he’s not a good guy.

It’s true that love is blind. When you are in love with someone, your logic tends to fail. You will ignore all his flaws but your friends and well-wishers can see the truth as clear as day. They will always try to warn you about him because they genuinely love you and wants only the best for you.

So, if they keep on telling you that he’s not a good guy, you should listen to them. What you might not understand properly, the people around you sometimes can.

(8) He always talks about himself.

When a man is using you, he will never take your feelings, likes, dislikes, thoughts and opinions into consideration; he will only be talking about himself. Whenever you might want to talk about something that is related to you, he will manipulate the situation and somehow make it about himself.

He does not care what you are going through in your life, nor does he want to. He is so self-obsessed that it doesn’t even register in his mind that you also might have important to say, or you might have something to share.

Related: 15 Red Flags Of Manipulative People

(9) He calls you for sex, but never goes on a date with you.

Whenever you want to plan a romantic date with him, he is somehow always busy, but when sex is concerned, he has all the time in the world. He never has time to go for a movie with you, but he has all the time in the world for a hookup. When a man is only interested in having a physical relationship with you, then it’s not worth it.

Relationships are more than just having sex, so if your relationship has only that, then it’s time to rethink everything. You deserve much better than a person like this.

(10) He always conceals his phone.

You know you can never trust a man when he is always hiding his phone from you. Snooping around in your partner’s phone and checking all his messages is not healthy, but if he is always uncomfortable and super-possessive about his phone whenever he is with you, it’s a huge red flag. If he is a trustworthy person, he won’t have to resort to all this.

If he has nothing to hide from you, he will never hide his phone. But if he is, then he should not be trusted. Ever.

A man who gets into a relationship just to use his woman will eventually leave her when he’s done using her. Such relationships are extremely toxic and never last. So, if you see these signs, it’s better you get out of it. The world is a vast place, and you will find your Mr. Right someday.


Signs Your Man Is Using You Even When It Doesn't Look Like
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  1. marian hales Avatar
    marian hales

    Went thru this. Everything in this article is true and shit happens. We just are too emerged to acknowledge it.

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