Did you know that your love language is deeply linked to your childhood? Believe it or not, the way we were treated as infants leave a long-reaching effect on our personalities, and an anxious attachment style, caused due to adverse childhood experiences can lead to unsuccessful romantic relationships.
According to the tenets of Attachment Theory, the way we behave in our adult relationships is called our Attachment Style. And our attachment style depends on how we were treated and cared for by our caregivers when we were babies.
Do you want to know more about the Anxious Attachment Style and how it can influence your romantic relationships? Then read on!
In this article, we have covered everything you need to know about Anxious Attachment, including what causes anxious attachment style, signs of anxious attachment, anxious attachment triggers, and much more, with helpful tips on what to do if you have an anxious attachment style. So let’s start.
What Is Attachment Theory?
Back in the 1960s, a group of psychologists formulated a model called Attachment Theory, aiming to study and describe the ways in which infants, as well as adults, connect to other people on emotional and behavioral levels.
According to this theory, as children, we develop one of the four attachment style patterns, based on how our needs were addressed by our primary caregivers.
The 4 Attachment Styles:
The following attachment styles are developed early in our childhood.
What Is An Anxious Attachment Style?
Anxious Attachment Style, also known as Preoccupied Attachment Disorder, is an insecure attachment pattern that arises from childhood neglect, hurt, or abandonment. People who develop an anxious attachment style, tend to be highly emotionally dependent on their partners. Their partner’s deteriorating mood, any chance of separation, abandonment, or any such anxious attachment triggers can set them off on an emotional tailspin.
What Causes Anxious Attachment?
Genetics and the parenting styles of our caregivers are often believed to be responsible for the development of our individual attachment styles. As far as anxious attachment patterns are concerned, the following parental behaviors are significantly associated:
1. Failure To Respond To A Child’s Needs
If a caregiver fails to respond to an infant’s needs, for example, forgets to change the baby’s soiled diapers or doesn’t console the child when crying, this may lead the child to form an insecure attachment with the caregiver.
2. Antipathetic Parenting Style
When a parent or caregiver is critical, insensitive, and emotionally distant from the child, the vulnerable kid is left with an insatiable craving for care, pampering, and affection, pushing them towards an anxious attachment style.
3. Inconsistent/Unpredictable Parenting
Sometimes a parent is inconsistent in their parenting style. One moment the child finds the caregiver to be caring, nurturing, and attuned to them, the next moment they find their basic needs like, attention, security, and unconditional love, which are snubbed by the unpredictable parent.
It goes without saying that such inconsistent behavior can wreak havoc on the tender mind of a child. They never know what to expect and thus become emotionally needy and vulnerable.
What Are The Signs Of Anxious Attachment Style?
Although anxious ambivalent attachment issues develop in our formative years, the anxious attachment style symptoms can be found much later in life.
Anxious Attachment Style In Adults:
Adults with anxiety attachment display the following signs:
- People with an anxious attachment style are insecure in relationships
- They always suffer from a fear of abandonment by their partners
- This insecurity in relationships is often fueled by a fear of rejection
- They also exhibit trust issues
- Those who struggle with anxiety attachment generally have a poor self-worth
- They always crave intimacy and closeness in their relationships
- Being dependent on their relationship, they need to be frequently validated
- They are highly sensitive to their partner’s behavior and moods
- They are emotionally unstable, moody, impulsive, and unpredictable