30 Signs You Are Dating A Fuckboy

1. He tells you all the sweet words in the world during the times that he’s trying to get to know you, does chivalrous deeds in the beginning, and makes you truly special. But once you have given that one YES, he starts vanishing the week after — leaving you to wonder out loud whether you did something wrong.

2. He loves to send you text messages at midnight and you can’t help but wonder if he’s either drunk or really horny.

3. He only wants to date you past 6 pm. When you ask him if he’s rather available to hang out with you on weekends during daylight, he gives you hundred of excuses that he can’t. His rules of dating you past 6 pm is in default, and if that doesn’t give you a red flag warning that he only wants to sleep with you — I don’t know what else is.

4He doesn’t want to introduce you to his parents even if you’re dating each other for a significant period of time. I mean, isn’t it weird that if he sees you as his ‘forever bae’, he would have made a move to set up a meeting with his parents? Or at least be proud of how amazing of a person you are?

5. He cares about his bro a lot than you. He can’t watch a movie with you tonight because he’s playing video games with Evan. He can’t fetch you up after work because he’s going to help Martin with his computer problem. And a lot more stupid reasons why he can’t agree with all your plans.

6. He low-key makes you realize that if you’re going to take the last item in his priority lists, you’re going to have to put yourself below it.

7. He’s not cool with taking selfies together, nor tagging him with anything on Facebook, nor adding any of his friends on social media. You are a ghost person in his social bubble and he’s determined to keep it that way.

8. He gets upset when you ask him about his previous relationships, and gets defensive when you push the subject further. He lamely tells you that he doesn’t want to dwell on the past because blablabla…

9. He gives you cold treatment for the next few days when you can’t send him a nude photo that he’s asking at 1 AM.

10. He plays the victim in an argument and pulls off a line that comes along with, “Yeah. You’re always right and I’m always wrong. And I get it.” Like, yes dickwad you’re too dumb to be right.

11. He doesn’t understand the rules of 10 dates before sex and he thinks you’re too conservative to even exist in this world. But he keeps dating you anyway, hoping to make it to stage 10. After that time, he’s ready to flee again.

12. It takes him half a day to reply to your message although he casually mentions to you before that he brings his smartphone with him whenever he goes to the toilet.

13. It bothers him that he doesn’t get a certain number of likes on his Instagram and he takes the amount of his followers way too seriously.

14. He comes running back in your life once he realizes that he’s bored and needs someone to play games with. It’s a cycle of appearing and ghosting for him, and he thinks it’s normal.

15. He keeps saying disgusting stuffs like “I wish I was there to shower with you.” Or “I hope you are here with me in my bed.” And it’s like chill out dude. There are million other lovely fantasies you can imagine me with.

16. He’s not interested about how’s your day, or how stress you are in life, or how you want to take a break somewhere. He usually just replies with, “I’m tired.” Or “Okay.”

17. His definition and understanding of respect is vague.

18. He asks you to eat outside but tells you he has no money. Cheapskate has no money and he doesn’t have the decency to at least ask you nicely.

19. He doesn’t see the value in arts, or why a certain song lyrics is written that way, why La La Land wins a lot of awards, or inquires you what’s La La Land by the way?

20. You catch him secretly looking at people with such intense lust as they pass by. You debate whether he needs a therapy or should consider seeing a doctor for his perversion.

Angelo Caerlang
Angelo is a 22 year old millennial who's always thankful every day that he is given a chance to write. He relates his life lessons through his writing in hopes to reach people and connect with them. He believes that regardless of our differences in culture, language, and religion -- we all have a common denominator when it comes to emotions. It is his goal to make us all feel as if we're all one in this vast universe. AwardsClass Valedictorian of 2010

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