“There’s a guy out there who will want to tell everyone that he is your boyfriend. Quit goofing around and go find him.”
— Greg Behrendt, He’s Just Not That Into You
It’s surely a difficult thing to resist men with amazing personalities when we clearly know we should be staying away from them. Guys who are either good or bad are easy to deal with but if he is a combination of both, that becomes a problem.
He behaves like a good guy and perhaps, he is one; he is honest with his feelings, he doesn’t flatter but he is always playing games with you only to have sex.
He is one of the friendliest guys you have ever known; he is there for his friends and his friends speak high of him. But the girl he is dating or is interested in comes last in his priority list and holds the chance of getting replaced by others.
He tells you about your good qualities, he praises you for something you have done but he doesn’t give any indication of sharing your success with you. His words echo the one of any other admirer with a clear sign of distance.
He will talk to you if you meet on the road, even accompany you home but that’s it. It’s obvious for you to feel bad about it because even if he doesn’t give you indication of anything, just conversing with him makes you feel hopeful about the possibility of a relationship.
He’s a wonderful guy to be around but when you are not with him, he hardly cares.
He might not be a flirt and he is definitely not rude; he doesn’t promise you any future with him but his companionship makes you feel happy and somewhere deep down, you start expecting something beyond friendship.
He is the nice f*ckboy who will make the moments with him feel out of the world. He will be clear of his intentions and tell you directly that he is not looking anything beyond a sexual relationship. So, when he leaves, you feel devastated.
He never rejected you in words but this sort of behaviour, this line, this upfront explanation of what he wants is more painful than a rejection.
Just because he is not choosing you, that doesn’t mean he is a bad guy. There might be tons of reasons of his behaviour. Perhaps he wasn’t a f*ckboy before but now he has become. He might have trust issues with people, he might have a traumatic past, he might have a few other things and the reason he is rejecting you probably has got nothing to do with you.