7 Types Of Emotional Baggage And How To Unpack Them


, , ,
types of emotional baggage and how to unpack them

Do you find yourself ending up in similar dead-end situations or feel that you always get the short end of the stick? Do you keep attracting the same kind of toxic partner time and again? Chances are you are carrying one or more types of emotional baggage, meaning you are stuck in a pattern, and you need to unpack right now!

Although the term “emotional baggage” has become quite mainstream, just like our travel baggage, they are unique to each of us. As the types of emotional baggage vary, so do their effects. If you think you or your loved one might be carrying some unwanted load that is stopping you to live your best life, read on!

What Is Emotional Baggage?

Emotional baggage is a metaphor to describe our emotional stress or burden that though originated in the past, we still carry its residual energy in the present. It is essentially our unresolved mental blockage that dictates our behaviors and influences the life choices we make. A study says our emotional baggage can prevent us from making better life choices.

For instance, if you have suffered neglect or abuse in your first romantic relationship, it might have scarred you so deeply that you have grown to become hyper defensive regarding your heart. As a result, you keep seeing red flags in all your relationships and drive away perfectly good suitors.

What Are The Different Types Of Emotional Baggage?

As we have already covered that there are several types of emotional baggage, now let’s look at the most common ones and learn to deal with each one of them.

1. Inner-Criticism

Often times when we grow up with overbearing parents who keep dishing out a volley of criticism and derogatory remarks with little to no encouragement or positive reinforcement, we lose our confidence in our potential. We become our harshest inner-critics and remain so even after we grow up.

We need to resolve this toxic pattern so that we can have a healthy self-image and can take decisions that are ideal for us, not for impressing anybody else. Our parents wrongly assumed that their negative comments would inspire us to apply ourselves more in our academics or sports, but we must not give any power to that kind of unhealthy behavior and must never carry the cycle on to our next generation.

Related:  How Does Shame From Toxic Childhood Stress Still Harm Us? 

2. Psychological Trauma

Psychological trauma, such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can leave deep-rooted and long-lasting behavioral and emotional implications. Trauma severely affects our Emotion Regulation, causing us to feel overwhelmed and anxious whenever we get the slightest trigger that reminds us of the dreaded incident. We can manifest traumatic responses through physical, cognitive, or emotional symptoms, including flashbacks, outbursts, nightmares, and so on.

It is ideal to seek medical intervention and therapy to cope with psychological trauma. Mental health professionals can help us to process these haunting memories of ours so that they don’t consume us or control our lives.

Related: Structural Dissociation: How Complex Trauma Causes A Split In Our Being

3. Grief

Losing a friend or family member to death is one of the most difficult experiences of life and it is absolutely natural to go through a grieving process. However, if we don’t allow ourselves this period of processing our loss or somehow fail to resolve our grief in absence of a nurturing environment, we may fail to get on with our lives.

Thus, it is important to take time and process our feelings so that our love for the parted loved one does not pose a threat to our emotional well-being. If we want to move on with our lives, we must seek the support of our friends and family while we go through this grieving process.

Related: The Stages Of Grief: Ways To Cope With Loss and Minimize The Pain

4. Resentment

When we face unfair or unfavorable circumstances for no fault of ours, it is but natural to develop a feeling of resentment or anger. This anger can be directed towards specific people, such as our parents, teachers, coaches, or society, community, cultural practices, and such. Nonetheless, if we let this resentment grow and continue to influence our minds, we will project our unresolved emotions onto others who do not deserve this treatment.

Therefore, we should identify from where our anger is stemming out and take some healthy measures to resolve it. We can confront the person who is responsible for our pain and make them realize in a peaceful way, how they have hurt us, we can forgive and let go of the anger.

Related:  Why You Are Frustrated And Angry All The Time: 5 Psychological Reasons

5. Fear

Our fear emotions are triggered when we perceive a danger. Fear is supposed to prepare our bodies to face the perceived threat or attack. However, according to research, “dysfunction in fear processing can lead to psychiatric disorders in which fear outweighs the danger or possibility of harm.” This gives birth to phobias which are debilitating conditions that if left untreated prevent us to live a normal life.

It is not easy to face our fears but if we can approach to manage our fear methodically and take support from our loved ones as well as from experts, we can live our lives more productively. We can do what scares us the most but in a controlled and safe environment.

Related: 33 Lies Your Anxiety Tells You

6. Guilt

Guilt, shame, or regret can be quite a silent killer. If someone fought with a parent right before they passed away, or if a husband cheats on his wife and loses her forever in the process, the feeling of guilt can eat them up from inside. And this shame and regret will have detrimental effects on their self-image. It will become difficult for them to speak their mind or forge another romantic relationship, respectively.

Although guilt indicates that the person has acknowledged their mistake and wants to make changes, unresolved guilt can mar the prospect of a healthy future. We must understand that as human beings we are bound to make mistakes and be compassionate with ourselves. We need to identify where we go wrong, make amends, and do better next time. If we fail we will try again.

Related: A 5-Step Guide To Escape The Guilt Trap

7. Failure

The most common side effect of heartbreak is the emotional baggage of suspicion, paranoia, poor self-esteem, etc. Similarly, if we fail to get good grades at school, or fail to bag a lucrative job offer, sometimes we get into the thinking of either “we are not good enough” or “we are unlucky”. Obviously, both are self-limiting false narratives that we feed ourselves.

Success can never be guaranteed and our failure doesn’t have to be the ultimate reality. We need to be objective about our life and take the power back, rather than blaming ourselves or our stars. If we learn our lessons from a failure and try again, we can make significant progress in our career and personal lives.

Related: Valuable Lessons From Pain: 10 Ways My Pain Helped Me Grow

How To Tell Whether You Have Emotional Baggage?

Some common signs of emotional baggage are:

  • Emotional instability
  • Frequent job-hopping
  • Commitment issues
  • Paranoia or anxiety
  • Feeling of insecurity
  • Always feeling dissatisfaction

It’s Good To Travel Light

Once we identify our emotional baggage we can take steps to unload these unwanted energies that keep us from flying high. If your partner or a family member has one or more of the above-mentioned types of emotional baggage, please help them unpack.

types of emotional baggage and how to unpack them pinexx
types of emotional baggage and how to unpack them pinex
types of emotional baggage and how to unpack them pin

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Up Next

5 Powerful Benefits of Imaginative Thinking

Imaginative Thinking: Powerful Benefits Of Imagination

The benefits of imaginative thinking are unending to be honest. However, in this article we are going to explore five of the most interesting and powerful benefits of imagination and imaginative thinking.


Imagination is a fundamental aspect of human life.

Imagination enables one to look beyond the world as it is.

Imagination helps create different lenses through which to see the world.


Up Next

What Kind Of Angry Are You? The 4 Types Of Anger

The Types Of Anger: What Kind Of An Angry Person Are You?

Everyone gets angry at some point, and anger is probably one of the most common emotions we feel. But did you know there are different types of anger, namely, 4 types of anger? This article is going to talk about the different types of anger and how they look like. So, what is your anger style? Let’s find out!

Anger may rear its emotional head in irritation and annoyance, self-pity and withdrawal, envy and resentment, or vengeance and violence. Our anger may fill the room with dominance or veil itself in anxiety or avoidance.

Those who internalize anger may question whether they have the right to be angry and avoid direct confrontation. They stuff their anger down to prevent offending, being disliked, or losing control.

Those who externalize anger resort to blaming, shaming, and engage i

Up Next

Stop Texting Your Ex ‘Happy Birthday’ – Here Are 5 Reasons Why!

Stop Texting Your Ex Happy Birthday: Important Reasons

Have you found yourself scrolling through Snapchat memories, thinking of texting your ex happy birthday? You think to yourself, can sending a simple “Happy Birthday” text hurt? But don’t be fooled by temptation – it’s never a good idea.

Life is full of ups and downs, but some things are better left alone. Making contact with them on their special day could stir up old emotions and put you in a tough place.

It not only opens doors to issues but also sends mixed signals, confuses both parties involved, and even more so can bring back haunting memories that should stay in the

Up Next

50+ Deep Self Reflection Questions For Personal Growth

Deep Self Reflection Questions For Personal Growth

Are you ready for some deep self reflection about growth? Well, you’ve come to the right place! Self reflection questions are like little nuggets of wisdom that can help you uncover and understand your true self, aid in your personal growth, and make sense of this crazy journey called life.

Whether you’re looking to understand yourself more deeply, set new goals, or simply gain clarity, these self reflection questions are going to serve as your trusty companions. So grab a cozy spot, maybe a cup of tea, and get ready to dive into the depths of your mind, and do some much-needed self reflection about growth.

Related: 40 Deep Questions To Ask I

Up Next

4 Benefits Of Moving Meditation And How To Do It: Dance Your Stress Away!

Ways To Elevate Your Spirit with Moving Meditation Magic

Do you find meditation challenging? Is sitting still during meditation difficult for you? Then you would be more than glad to know about moving meditation. If traditional meditation isn’t working for you, then you can still find inner peace while on the move.

Welcome to the world of moving meditation, where the gentle flow of movement becomes a pathway to inner harmony and mindfulness. Instead of zoning out on a cushion, you can get your zen on while walking, dancing, or even washing dishes. Sounds pretty cool, right? 

Today, let us explore what is moving meditation, discover its various types, delve into the numerous movement meditation benefits, and learn how to incorporate this beautiful practice into our daily lives. Here every step, sway, and scrub becomes a pathway to inner peace. So, let’s dive in.

Up Next

How To Stop A Racing Mind: 7 Techniques For Mastering Mental Turbulence

How To Stop A Racing Mind: Ways To Tame A Racing Mind

Ever found yourself lying in bed, desperately trying to sleep after a long, tiring day, but your mind refuses to do so? It feels like your mind is racing like a Formula 1 car on caffeine. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there! That relentless stream of thoughts can feel overwhelming, leaving you feeling restless and exhausted. So, how to stop a racing mind?

In this article, we’ll talk about the meaning of racing thoughts and how to calm a busy mind. Let’s explore the seven best ways to stop your mind from racing, and discover the blissful art of finding your inner calm amidst all the chaos.

First, let’s talk about the meaning of racing thoughts.


Up Next

8 Ways How To Heal Your Inner Teenager: Say Goodbye To Teenage Wounds And Thrive

How To Heal Your Inner Teenager: Life-Changing Steps

Do you ever feel overwhelmed by emotions, react impulsively, or experience a sense of insecurity and self-doubt? These are signs that your inner teenager might be in need of healing. Let’s explore how to heal your inner teenager.

Hey there, soul wanderer! In life, we often feel stuck, anxious, fearful, and out of touch with our inner selves. This can make us behave and react in certain ways that are reminiscent of our teenage years. This might happen due to certain negative experiences, traumas, and emotional wounds that deeply affected us when we were a teenager. 

Just like a physical wound, our emotional wounds from our teenage years can linger and affect us well into adulthood. This is why healing is absolutely crucial for self-discovery and empowerment. But how to heal the inner teenager?