If you do notice a pattern, reflect on what your role is in this pattern and where this pattern may stem from. When you’re ready, journal about what you learned from this breakup that you can apply to your other relationships moving forward.
4. Prioritize your self-care.
When coping with a breakup it can be tempting to dive headfirst into several pints of ice cream and repeated Netflix binges. It’s important to meet yourself where you are and allow yourself the time and space to engage these types of activities (if desired) without shaming yourself.
However, when you feel ready, you may also want to consider the basics that fuel your body since doing so can help prime you to cope with the breakup in an adaptive manner that feels more manageable.
If you’re not sure where to start, consider realistic ways that you can engage in eating nourishing foods, moving your body regularly, and getting adequate sleep. It may feel overwhelming to make too many changes at once, so consider how you can start to incorporate small changes in these three areas of your life.
5. Be mindful of social media use and limit contact with your ex.
Staying in contact with an ex when you haven’t moved on yet can be a painful reminder of what you lost. If you’re still friends with your ex on social media, consider blocking or temporarily removing their posts from your feed. If they are still texting or emailing you, consider blocking them for now or telling them you don’t want to have contact right now.
Seeing videos, posts, texts, and/or emails from your ex may initially feel good but ultimately it can create false hope of reconciling, further exacerbate your distress, and prolong the healing process.
Want to know more about how you can feel better after a breakup and turn it into a breakthrough? Read 10 Ways To Survive Post-Breakup Blues
6. Engage in new activities or hobbies you enjoy.
Use this time to explore hobbies or interests you may have been putting on the backburner. If you’re not sure where to start, consider taking a fun class where you try a new activity or try reflecting about activities that brought you joy when you were younger.
7. Practice self-compassion.
When you’re going through a breakup it can be tempting to blame yourself for mistakes you made or worry that you may never find love again but doing so can narrow your perspective and exacerbate your pain during a time when you need support the most.
Imagine if a trusted friend were in a similar situation. Would you berate your friend when they’re feeling down and tell them that they’ll never find love again?
Rather than agreeing with their negative self-talk, you would likely provide them with support and comfort. Think about what you would tell this friend and apply these same statements to yourself.
8. Reflect about previous times you’ve experienced a breakup or another painful experience.
Reflecting about a previous time in your life that was painful may sound counterintuitive but can actually help you to heal from this breakup.
Often when we experience a breakup or other difficult time period in our lives, we may fear that things won’t get better but they often do eventually. There is no doubt that being in pain isn’t fun but it can also contribute to us experiencing growth and beginning to recognize strengths we didn’t know we had.
Thinking back to these previous times in your life and remembering that you made it through as well as reflecting about what helped you get through those difficult time periods can help instill hope and give you important information about tools you can use to help yourself cope with this time around.
Looking to know more about how you can handle your breakup better? Read How To Manage Feeling Depressed After A Breakup