6. They will use rejection as a means of testing you
Narcissists are insecure individuals who need constant assurance that they are being loved and cared for. They might text you back after a long time and rebuke you when you do the same. They will talk about other people in front of you and how they provide more to their lives than you. They will constantly remind you of your shortcomings and how there are numerous people in their lives and you are just one of them. This creates confusion in you as you thought you were special to them and will keep on trying to win their love or attention back.
7. They will try to induce a sense of shame in you
A narcissist will always try to project their negative emotions on the other person. They get insecure when their partner reaches a level of security or achieves something significant in their lives and see it as a potential threat to their relationship. For example, you getting a good job or hanging out with your friends might get them jealous and they will not fail to make you feel ashamed for this. This makes you retreat into your familiar mental agony and wonder what you did to make them upset.
8. They make you doubt your sanity
Most narcissists like to emotionally manipulate people. They get attracted to people who are kind, generous and peaceful. However, all they really want to do is erase those qualities from that individual. Over time, they continue to manipulate your feelings and when they start an argument, and you get angry, they pinpoint the blame on you, saying you are the one blowing up. This makes you doubt your sanity as you were a peaceful and kind person. Over time, you start to believe that you are the root of all problems and will try harder to please the narcissist, thus creating a vicious cycle.
9. You develop addiction and engage in self-destructive behavior
You develop addictions towards drugs, cigarettes or alcohol. This might be your coping mechanism for creating a safe haven for yourself, away from all that emotional anguish and trauma that the narcissist creates. You also stray away from your friends or family and make poor or no choices at all for your career, which suits the narcissist well as now you are vulnerable and only have them for your supposed comfort.
10. Anxiety and depression
Over a period of time, the narcissist supplier will develop anxiety from prolonged emotional abuse. The narcissist also takes advantage of this situation to present himself as the superior one in social situations while the supplier is in an emotional mess. This creates a negative association in their brains regarding social situations and they are forced to believe that they are the inferior ones in the relationship, which can also cause depression.
Also read: 10 Tips On How To Spot A Narcissist On The First Date
How to start the healing process
The first and foremost step to heal yourself is to recognize the situation. Try to look at your scenario from a different perspective and ask yourself, “Is this really right”, or “Is this what I really wanted.” You should trust your gut and recognize a situation when it does not feel right. Only when you understand how you are being used by a narcissist for his/her narcissistic supply, then can you start your healing process.
The most effective solution for healing from a narcissist is to stay as far away from them as possible and cutting them off from your lives completely. This is better said than done, as since you are their primary supply, they will leave no stone unturned to emotionally manipulate or put you back into your place again.
In situations like these, it is important to reach out to friends or family for support. If you feel threatened by their presence, you can even reach out to your local law enforcement for help. Your absence will not matter to a narcissist for a long time as they will find someone else to fill your gap. You can start feeling lonely and depressed in situations like these.
Read more: How To Disconnect From A Narcissist Using The ‘Observe, Don’t Absorb’ Technique
However, it is important that you remember past loving relationships in these situations and understand that the future holds numerous probabilities for you to experience the feeling of love and affection once more.
