Identifying Emotional Abuse before it Happens.

2021



And I’ll leave you with this, only because it’s applicable to all injustices everywhere, not just the gross human rights violation that is domestic violence.

“Great spirits have always encountered violent oppression from mediocre minds” ~ Albert Einstein.

If someone/thing/force is bringing you down through its weakness, flush that shit and don’t forget to wipe.


Source: Elephant Journal




Stages of Grief from a Psychopathic Relationship
Identifying Emotional Abuse before it Happens



22 COMMENTS

  1. I see why you say, “Don’t ask me why I stayed”. Most people who ask that have never lived through it and they don’t understand. The worst is when you get it from your family – and then when the shit hits the fan, you’re left with a lot of “I told ya so’s”.

    I was here too. My relationship only lasted 7 months – he worked fast. But it was long enough for him to do a lot of damage…both to me and my life, and to my relationship with my son (not his – we didn’t have children together). Mine ended up being a narcissistic sociopath, mixed in with a drug addict who simply refused to do the work that needed to be done in order to recover.

    The sad part about all of this is that it didn’t start to make sense until the relationship was over, I had kicked him out, and ended up becoming friends with someone from HIS past. The more she and I spoke, the more I was internally kicking myself and saying, “how could I have been so stupid!” and “I wish I’d known” because frankly I would have dropped him before the relationship even began.

    He put his hands on me a couple of times and it was a year ago yesterday. He also threatened to harm my child – which should have been the final straw…but even through that I tried to make things “fair” for everyone by explaining away and excusing his behavior with his drug habit – that and the fact that he had me terrified that if I called the police he really would hurt my kid. I was stuck and I was a hostage in the relationship.

    The day finally came, a couple of months later, where he basically did me the favor of robbing me to fund his drug habit, and leaving me stranded without a working vehicle. I told him if he showed up again he would have been met by the authorities. I finally grew my backbone, and told him I had nothing more to give him because he took it all. He tried to manipulate me one last time with the threat that he was going to kill himself but I surprised him when I told him I didn’t care.

    Most importantly, I’ve also fixed my relationship with my teenage son and things have gotten back to normal – like before I even met that guy. I had to take a long, hard look at the damage I was doing by just trying to make things fair and easy for everyone involved.

    So – this coming September, he will have been gone a full year. I’ve gone “no-contact” this entire time. I’ve written about him, I’ve bitched about him, I’ve joined support groups as well as some Co-Dependency Anonymous meetings (which really helped me put myself first). I feel like I’m talking about him less and less and I go longer stretches of time without letting the thought of his stupidity enter my mind. I’m even trying to date again, but I notice now that I’m always watching my dates…and still kind of suspicious of any kind gestures or nice words – maybe that means I’m not completely ready yet. Who knows.

  2. How very generous to share your experience on such a delicate matter . Thank you . I for one, am very grateful .
    I was not cognisant of the classic psychopathic / narcissistic relationship I was steeped in . I can’t afford a 6 year learning curve @ my age
    ( I’m 70 ) The greatest difficulty was in the logistics , ie. he had moved in as a tenant but repeatedly refused to leave .
    I now have a greater level of understanding , again thank you

  3. I love these articles. Oh yes, been through it all. Gaslight for me was having my belongings hidden and then”finding” them for me. Even said, “I find a lot of things for you. ”
    True crazy making behaviors.