Why Do You Keep Dreaming About Your Ex?

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Dreaming about your ex is a very common thing, believe it or not, and everyone has at some point dreamed about their ex. But this does not always signify that deep, down inside you want to get back together with them, or you are still in love with them. Most importantly, it doesnโ€™t also mean that you are unhappy with your current partner.

Your unconscious mind, and the reasons behind the dreams you dream are not always going to be black and white, as the human mind can be quite complicated at times. However, that doesnโ€™t take away from the fact that it can be an uncomfortable feeling dreaming about your ex constantly, despite the relationship ending a considerable time ago.

Having dreams about your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend can have many reasons and interpretations behind them. So what does dreaming about your ex mean?

8 Reasons You Keep Dreaming About Your Ex

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1. You are looking for closure.

One of the most common reasons why you might be dreaming about your ex is because you never got the closure you deserved from them. Breakups are complicated, and they donโ€™t always work out the way you want, do they?

Sometimes you wish you hadnโ€™t said the things you did. Sometimes you wish things didnโ€™t unravel the way they did. And sometimes, you wish you could have done things differently.

But you know what? You donโ€™t need to get in touch with your ex to get the closure that you are consciously or subconsciously looking for. Because sometimes, a simple dream is enough to help you get the closure you are seeking, and work towards finally feeling at peace with your past.

Related: 7 Common Dreams and Their Meanings

2. You are still grieving the end of your past relationship.

Even when the breakup is a mutual decision, and was an amicable one, itโ€™s natural to mourn the loss of the person you had loved for so long, and who is not a part of your life anymore. The feelings that you donโ€™t feel, and the things that you donโ€™t think about when you are awake, tend to come back to you when you are asleep.

Sometimes, you might find yourself dreaming about the death of your ex. But donโ€™t worry, this does not mean you want them to die! It simply means you are grieving the โ€˜deathโ€™ of the relationship, and believe it or not, this is one of the healthiest ways of letting someone go for good, and moving on with your life.

3. You might be going through the same problems in your current relationship.

When you have dreams about ex, it might mean this. If you are experiencing communication problems, intimacy issues, or having emotional breakdowns in your current relationship, then your unconscious mind is trying to show you that these same problems have happened before, and itโ€™s happening again.

When you are dreaming about your ex, your mind is trying to tell you to resolve all the issues that are currently plaguing your relationship, before you run out of time. Nobody likes to have a bunch of failed relationships in their life, do they? So, this is your mindโ€™s way of trying to help you solve the problems you are facing.

4. You miss what your ex stood for.

One of the most interesting things about dreams is that even when they have really significant meanings attached to them, they are hardly ever literal. For the most part, your dreams will always be symbolic.

What you see in your dreams are simply manifestations of the several thoughts, situations, and events that your mind stores all throughout the day.

The spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex might point to the fact that you had a very deep, intimate relationship with them and you might be missing that connection now.

Also, if your ex had good and meaningful qualities that your current partner doesnโ€™t, you might end up seeing your ex in your dreams, because you miss how they were, and what they represented.

5. You are trying to move on from past trauma.

Your unconscious mind is always trying to work through several unresolved traumas and issues, be it from your past relationships, childhood, or some other kind of trauma you might have experienced at some juncture of your life.

If there are any unsolved relationships in your life, chances are they are going to follow you from one relationship to the other.

For instance, if you were cheated on in your previous relationship, you might feel the urge to cheat on your current partner with your ex, just so you can work through your inherent trust issues.

This is simply you using your ex-partner as a substitute to aid your unconscious mind to navigate through the bigger obstacle. Keep a watch on your dreams, and you might as well get the right answers.

Related: How to Decode Your Dreams So They Help You When You Are Awake

6. You dreaming of an ex might just be a coincidence.

If you are feeling freaked out about the fact that you dreamed of your ex, then donโ€™t just reach any deep conclusions right now, because it might just be a coincidence.

If you feel that you are constantly having dreams about your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend, then consider the other people you also dream of at times. Be it your family members, friends, colleagues, and other people, it might not be something to get apprehensive about.

It might be you are attaching too many emotions and importance to the fact that you are dreaming about your ex. However, if you find yourself getting rattled every time this happens, you can keep a dream journal that will help you understand the recurring patterns of your dreams.

7. You are still angry.

If youโ€™re dreaming about your ex, one of the potential reasons might be because you harbor a lot of anger, bitterness, and resentment towards them, which has remained unresolved to date.

The way things went down in your past relationship, the way they treated you, and how the relationship ended โ€“ all of these reasons are still fresh in your mind, which is why you still have a lot of anger within you.

Your conscious mind might have suppressed all that anger and the negative emotions associated with it, to shield you from the pain. On the other hand, your unconscious mind is trying to tell you to face those feelings, and work through them so that you can move on for good, and also not let those feelings spill over into your next relationship.

8. You might still have feelings for your ex.

Now, this might be the least likely reason, but nevertheless, still a reason. Normally, if you have not moved on from your ex, you would think and talk about them when you are awake.

But then there are times when a person might be very out of touch with their emotional processes, which is why their ex might keep popping up in their dreams. If you belong to the second category, then you really need to introspect and look deep within yourself.

It is important to sit back and think about why the relationship ended, what and how things went down, and most importantly if it is something you want for yourself. Unless you work through all this, you will end up getting attracted to the same kind of people, and keep on having the same problems in all your relationships.

How can you decipher your dreams?

One of the most interesting things about your unconscious mind is that it codes things in your dreams so that they are not shocking enough to wake you up.

But at the same time, it makes sure that you have enough information to help you process all your unresolved issues and work through them. The same goes for the other people you dream of, even if you have not dated them.

Related: 25 Common Dreams and Their Meanings

Whenever you have a dream which you would like to know more about and want to decipher, ask yourself a few questions. These questions will help understand why you dreamed what you dreamed, and this clarity will help you understand yourself a lot well.

  • What and how do you feel in your dream?
  • The way you feel, have you ever felt like that before? Or is it something new? If you have felt this before when was the first time you did?
  • Do you see any numbers in your dream? If yes, then what do you think these numbers represent, or what do you associate these numbers with, in your real life?
  • The things, places, and people you see in your dream โ€“ do these signify anything from your past? If yes, then what?

Your dreams are a channel to your unconscious mind, and romantic dreams especially the ones that feature your ex-partner normally strive to help you answer all questions pertaining to relationships. What you might not think about when you are awake, your dreams have a way of showing you all that when you are asleep.

Always remember that your dreams will never take you on the path on which you will get hurt. They will always push you in the direction of happiness and clarity and help you understand the crucial parts of your psyche and emotions.

Dreams always have a purpose, and they will help you tremendously if you let them show you that. Never ignore your dreams, and always try to understand what they are showing you.


Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Does dreaming about your ex mean they miss you?

Lots of people think that just because they dreamed of their ex, it must mean their ex is missing them. But thatโ€™s not true. Chances are you are missing a part of who you were when you were with them, and now you miss that part of you.

What does it mean when you dream about an ex you donโ€™t talk to anymore?

If you dream about an ex you donโ€™t talk to anymore, it might mean that youโ€™re repressing certain parts of yourself along with your emotions and thoughts that you were open about when you were with them. Your dream might be telling you that you need to get in touch with your authentic self and embrace it.

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