In life, we all have the tendency to believe that we are unworthy on some deep, undefinable level. Whether we believe that we are unworthy of happiness, pleasure, love, or fulfillment, we all have a “core wound” deep inside that varies according to our circumstances and experiences.
This deep, fundamental wound is the result of the foundational beliefs that we were taught since birth, contributing to the faulty self-image that we continue to carry around with us to this very day.
Our core wounds are our deepest seated pains in life. They are our oldest and most miserable friends.
For most of us, these core wounds within us are ruled by the following two mistaken beliefs:
1. “I am flawed and therefore a bad person.”
2. “I must change or fix something about myself in order to be acceptable.”
The Original Sin (aka. How We Became Wounded)
Christian teachings make reference to our “core wound” all the time in the form of “original sin.” However, once we put aside the dogmatic associations connected with this notion, we see that “original sin” reveals something profound about our deep-rooted core wounds; how issues such as generational guilt, self-rejection, imbalanced self-esteem, and self-hatred have passed on from generation to generation.
Often, our core wounds start in childhood.
When we are little we are free, however, at some point during our childhood, we began to experience constraints. As we “ate from the Tree of Knowledge” (aka. grew and evolved as human beings) we slowly came up against invalidation and rejection from our parents, elders, and peers.
We began to experience disapproval and punishment for being our authentic selves; for having unique feelings, thoughts, outlooks, interests, and needs. And so, our core wounds began.
As our core wounds began to deepen throughout our childhoods, pubescent years, and subsequent adult years, we began to put up barriers of protection to keep other people from hurting us. Although in many cases this protected us, in the end, it served to trap us inside, limiting our ability to experience true freedom and authenticity in our day-to-day lives and in every one of our relationships.
Our core wounds are the cause of most of the fatigue we experience in daily life, preventing us from accessing the huge stores of untapped energy, and potential within us.
They are also what makes solitude so refreshing as they give us a momentary respite from the lies we tell ourselves and others to protect our deep, unhealed gashes.
12 Signs You Have An Unhealed Core Wound
Everyone experiences their core wound differently. Depending on your Soul Age, level of emotional sensitivity, and the level of rejection you faced while growing up, your core wound could be an irritating scab or a festering laceration.
How is your core wound manifesting itself in your life? Read the signs below:
1. You enter relationships in the hopes of finding what you lack inside in the other person (i.e., you want to “feel complete”).
2. You often feel inadequate, and you often have the following thoughts: “I am not enough,” “I am incomplete,” “I am unlovable,” “I don’t count,” “I am imperfect,” “I am powerless,” and “I am bad.”
3. You constantly feel a sense of abandonment, resentment, and/or betrayal from others.
4. You have a perfectionistic attitude towards life (i.e., you gain your self-esteem from the outcome of your actions instead of the intention behind your actions).
5. You suffer from chronic anxiety. This comes as a result of anticipating the emotional pain of being found unworthy, which deep down you think is true.
6. You repeat the same old mistakes in relationships. This is because you are trapped in a habitual mindset and don’t feel courageous enough to make a change.