Would you consider yourself to be a control freak? Control freaks experience feelings of frustration and irritability when things don’t go their way. From throwing fits to lashing out, they can do anything when losing control.
I never would have admitted this years ago, but I was a control freak. Like all control freaks, I thought I knew best and I constantly attempted to persuade others to my way of thinking and feeling. It was a full-time job, with long sleepless nights and no benefits to myself or others. But power comes from letting go! Take it from the confessions of a control freak.
It is not fun to be controlling, because the more we try to control, the more life gives us things to control – which, of course, in the end, we cannot control.
One of the biggest problems with control is that when we try to control, we close our hearts and we separate ourselves from others, and of course, whatever it is that we try to control, imprisons us. Read the confessions of a control freak to know more about why we control and why we should let go.
Most of us grew up learning how to control
We quickly became experts in all the ways to control others; knowing how to apply the right amount of pressure, calmly convincing, covertly cajoling, and when all else fails, applying emotional leverage – like guilt.
But, we don’t just try to control others, we try to control life as well, through such ineffective strategies as worry, fear and bargaining with unknown forces. More advanced techniques might include invoking the law of attraction to get what we want. All in the name of, “I know what’s best – and everyone, including life, should listen to me.”
The truth is, the more controlling we are, the more controlled we are – because in order to become controlling, first you need to be controlled. Society, school, culture, military, authority, and all sorts of rules that start with, “You should, must or have to….” all teach us how to control.
The desire to control comes from fear and that fear is programmed into us by the controlling hierarchy of society who want us to act, think and live in ways that support a fear-based world – that can easily be controlled. We are trained to be control freaks because as long as you are trying to control every aspect of your perceived reality you have no access to your true power. The controlling hierarchy much prefer a world of hyper-controlling people who believe that they have power rather than people who really do.
Yes, we control because we have been programmed to be controlling, but the core reason that we continue to control is because we do not trust life. We don’t trust life to take care of us and we believe that if we don’t try to control things, life will fail us and life will fail those we love.
Even if our controlling ways are somewhat successful, if we do not trust life, we are likely anxious, depressed and overwhelmed. When we are disconnected from life, we are also unplugged from the source of feeling good.
Peace and joy flow from a deep connection to life that can only be accessed through trust and letting go the control freak.
But how can I trust life?
Look around you – look at all life is – and how it continues to become, without our meddling or opinions. The sun rises and sets each day on precise cue. The tides roll in and out in flawless harmony. The planets rotate like a well-choreographed dance through the universe. Everything is perfectly orchestrated without your control.