Are you wondering how to let go of someone you love after infidelity after that certain someone has had an affair?
Do you still love your person but are you unsure if you want to stay or let go of them in light of what they have done?
Are you super confused and overwhelmed and not sure what to do next?
There are some questions that you can ask yourself when you are wondering how to let go of someone you love after infidelity. Knowing the answers to these questions, the WHY you need to move on, will help you get some clarity on whether truly letting go and moving on is an option for you.
Here Are The 5 Questions You Should Ask Yourself
1. Can you ever trust them again?
A very large part of being in a healthy relationship is trust. Without trust, a relationship is doomed to fail.
Your person has had an affair. They have violated your trust. Do you think that you can ever learn to trust them again?
Will you be okay when they say they have to work late? Will you always need to check their phone? Will you wonder every time you can’t account for their whereabouts for a few hours? Will you be upset whenever you see them talk to someone of the opposite sex?
The answers to these questions will help you figure out if you need to let go of someone you love after infidelity because if you can’t trust them, ultimately, they will make you supremely unhappy every day because your mind will always be going to dark places, places where you still suspect that your person is doing you wrong again.
So, if you can’t trust your person, letting them go, even if you love them, might be the best thing to do.
Want to know more about how you can deal with infidelity? Read Surviving Infidelity Together: 5 Ways Couples Can Move On From The Pain
2. Can you forgive them?
A big part of getting past someone’s affair is to ask yourself if you can forgive them for what they have done.
To forgive an affair involves many pieces. It means accepting that your person is just a person who makes mistakes. It means forgiving yourself for missing the signs and accepting that you are not a fool. It means acknowledging that this is not your fault. It means that your person has taken responsibility for their actions and that they are committed to not doing it again.
There are many pieces to forgiveness and, while it is possible to forgive someone for their infidelity if you know that you can’t let go of what has happened if you can’t forgive your partner for their betrayal, then letting them go will be a good idea so that you can both move on.
3. Do you want to still be with them?
If you are reading this article, I am guessing that you still love your person. My question to you is, do you still like them? Like them enough to want to still be with them?
Many people stay in relationships with people even if they don’t really want to be in a relationship with them because they think they must do so. The option of leaving just isn’t an option, for a variety of reasons.
And, if you don’t want to be with someone, if you actively don’t like them, staying with them will just make you miserable. More miserable than leaving.
So, a good way to work towards deciding if you must let go of someone you love after they commit infidelity is to see if you really do want to be with them or you are just holding on to some kind of ‘should.’
Want to know more about how you can make the right decision after infidelity? Read Does an Affair Mean the End of A Relationship? How To Recover from Infidelity