Becoming a more attractive man isn’t really that much hard work, but it isn’t that easy either. You need to be committed and dedicated to becoming a better version of yourself if you wish to be a truly attractive man.
You know what I’m really tired of?
Articles that promise the fastest, easiest, lowest-barrier-to-entry bullshit tips on how men can improve themselves.
Since when are we all after the quick and easy silver bullet? Have we collectively become that lazy as a society that we’re all perpetually salivating over shortcuts?
Well, today I’m going to deep dive into eleven proven methods that will make you not only more attractive as a man, but that will also make you into the kind of man who can get into and maintain a relationship with an equally high-value partner whenever you desire.
If you’re someone who loves using the word ‘triggered’ or you’re allergic to hard truths, I’d recommend you stop reading now.
Is It Possible To Become More Attractive?
I was on a coaching call the other week with a man who asked me this very valid question. Before we dive into how to become more attractive, it bears a moment of reflection to ask ourselves if we even believe that altering our attractiveness is even possible.
Generally, if someone has this question on their mind, one of two things is occurring.
1. They have experienced a healthy amount of pain and anguish around having not felt like a sexually viable partner to people who they wanted in the past, or
2. This question is being asked from a place of laziness and fear of stepping into hard work.
If the former is the case, this is totally understandable. If it feels like the game is rigged, that’s going to be more challenging to want to try to play the game again.
There’s a study I often think of in relation to cases like this wherein there was a dog who was presented with three paw-powered levers. One lever produced a small edible treat, the other two levers were neutral and produced no result.
In this instance, the dog would essentially play forever and keep getting treats (which is essentially what a human playing a slot machine is like).
But when one of the two neutral levers was switched so that it became a punishment (a small electric shock), the scientists found that the dog would simply stop playing the game altogether, lie down on the ground, and become despondent.
So that’s the first point. If you’ve experienced pain in the past when it came to meeting and attracting partners, then it’s going to be difficult to want to engage in self-improvement. I have compassion for this. It isn’t easy stuff. Your ego wants you to maintain the status quo at all costs, and your higher mind is challenging you to step forward and risk getting hurt again. Ultimately, this is difficult but necessary work.
On to the second point.
Some men ask the ‘is it even possible to become more attractive?’ question from a place of laziness. But why? What’s the secondary payoff of this?
Similar to the despondent dog analogy, this question is being asked from a place of avoiding pain in life.
The mind knows that if you accept the fact that “It is possible to increase my desirability as a partner in life” then the next step is to take action. And action requires effort. And the effort is hard. Harder than sitting around all day, eating nachos, and playing video games (I mean, hey, unless you’re a pro gamer, in which case fuck yeah, keep up the hustle my dude).
In short, just like any public company can become more valuable and trade for higher stock prices… and any product on the market can reiterate and improve itself… and an old beaten up car rusting away in someone’s backyard can receive a ton of TLC and become functional, street-legal, and even sexy… anyone can improve with enough dedication and will.