Invisible wounds inflicted by an emotionally abusive relationship can be the most damaging. Discover the signs to unravel the delicate web of deceit.
Physical abuse is something obvious. Thereโs concrete evidence that there is an issue and the relationship is an unhealthy one. But emotional abuse takes on a different form.
It isnโt so obvious and when youโve endured an emotionally abusive relationship like this for a long enough period of time you donโt even realize.
You begin to value the good days and good moments failing to address the bad ones. Because when someone loses their shit but is very good at blaming you and playing the victim, itโs that manipulation that makes you think this is okay.
11 Emotionally Abusive Relationship Signsย To Watch Out For!
1. They constantly put you down.
Emotionally abusive partners tend to build themselves up by knocking those around them down. They never want someone to outshine them or do better so they may never praise your accomplishments no matter how great they may be and in your mind, youโll always think you are falling short of their expectations.
2. They say things jokingly but they arenโt kidding.
There is a little bit of truth behind every โjust kiddingโ and when something rolls of their acid tongue you know they arenโt joking.
3. They tell you-you’re overly sensitive.
Emotionally abusive people gravitate towards those who they can manipulate and walk all over. And a common trait is someone being sensitive. But instead of taking your feelings into consideration, they blame you. Because you are always the problem.
Related: We Often Stay In Abusive Relationships Because of Trauma Bonding
4. Itโs all about control.
Emotionally abusive partners lack control in other parts of their life so they try and take it out on someone they can control. They like knowing everything. They like bossing you around. And the moment you try and stick up for yourself or defend yourself, they lash out because you are trying to take away their control.
Related: You Can Get PTSD From Staying In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
5. They threaten you.
If you donโt do what they tell you to, they threaten to take things away from you. This is just another way they control you.
6. They are the first to correct your mistakes but will never own up to their own.
When you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, youโre always going to have that feeling like you are walking on eggshells or someone is breathing down your back. Every mistake you make gets called out. Yet, youโd never think to do the same if the tables were turned.
Related: 6 Common Signs Youโre In An Abusive Relationship That Are Often Ignored
7. You struggle to make decisions on your own.
When someone is constantly controlling you and telling you what to do and when to do it, you become indecisive about making any choice of your own, that you freeze. And it can vary from really basic things to big life events, you ask other peopleโs opinions of.
8. They constantly point out your flaws.
Itโs hard to build yourself up and have confidence when someone is constantly knocking you down. You begin to hear their voice in everything. You look in the mirror and you are convinced youโd be happier if you didnโt have that flaw.
Related: 18 Relationship Red Flags You Should Never Ignore
9. They struggle to apologize.
While apologies do come, itโs hard for them to express it. Itโs hard for them to admit they are wrong. But they do have the charm to them which allows to the abusive cycle to continue.
10. They pull away or leave.
They are the first to cause a scene and make nothing into something. Either they will give you the silent treatment to try and get your attention or make you feel bad for them or theyโll just be overly dramatic and leave in hopes you beg them to come back.
The need to feel wanted and needed is what their goal is and to be able to control this narrative is what motivates them most.
11. They emotionally shut down.
While sometimes they are loving and caring, other times they are cold and distant. Their ability to shut down emotions and appear heartless makes having a relationship with them difficult because you just want them to be the good version of who they are all the time but you canโt love half of one person without address who they are as a whole.
Emotionally abusive relationships are difficult because when youโve been in one long enough your standards are suddenly very shifted and you fail to even know what a real relationship might look like. And when youโre presented with one all of it is unfamiliar
Have you experienced emotional abuse in a relationship? If yes, how did you overcome it?
Written By Kirsten Corley
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