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14 Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship

Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship

Sometimes when you are in an unhealthy relationship with someone, it can be difficult to see everything in an objective way, because of the deep love you feel for them. But looking out for a few warning signs of an unhealthy relationship can help you protect yourself from further pain and heartbreak. Now the question is, what is an unhealthy relationship, and what are the signs of an unhealthy relationship?

Key Points:

  • Avoiding problems in a relationship does not make them go away. They simply become harder to ignore.
  • Being disconnected from oneself can make it more difficult to see when a relationship is unhealthy.
  • One sign of an unhealthy relationship is when one person is over-functioning trying to keep it afloat.
  • The most important truths are the ones we often hide from ourselves when we’re not ready to face our fears or let go of a relationship we’ve been holding onto at the expense of ourselves.

    When you want so badly for a relationship to work that you avoid these important truths, they don’t go away. They show up at first as a small whisper, then they grow louder until it becomes harder and harder to ignore them.

    However, because unhealthy relationships can cause you to question yourself and your judgment, you may tune out this whisper—even as it grows louder. This disconnection from yourself may make it even more difficult to recognize when a relationship is not serving you.

    Following are 14 signs that you may be in an unhealthy relationship.

    Related: 5 Red Flags Of Unhealthy Relationship

    14 Warning Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship

    Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship info
    14 Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship

    1. You’re not voicing your boundaries, needs, or feelings due to fear that your partner will leave, label you as demanding or needy, and/or, will “blow up” at you.

    2. Multiple friends or family have expressed genuine concern about your relationship and the impact it’s having on you.

    3. You feel a growing discomfort about the relationship but ignore it or rationalize it by telling yourself that all relationships are hard and take work or that you know the other person can change.

    4. You feel the need to hide or distort parts of your relationship when sharing with others due to fear of judgment and may even distance yourself from loved ones as a result.

    5. You frequently feel anxious or on edge about your relationship.

    6. You are over-functioning (trying to save your partner, keep the relationship afloat, or overcompensate for the lack of effort they’re making) to make the relationship work.

    7. The relationship often feels like an emotional rollercoaster, you don’t know when you’ll be up or down.

    8. You keep hoping the person you’re with will finally change so that you can both be happy.

    9. You don’t feel emotionally safe or secure with your partner.

    10. You are sacrificing your authenticity for the relationship and losing parts of yourself in the process.

    11. You don’t feel good about yourself in this relationship. You often feel judged by your partner and full of self-doubt. You may even experience a lot of self-blame for anything that goes wrong in the relationship.

    12. You notice that after you got into this relationship, you started to feel distant from your family and friends.

    13. You often feel like you are walking on eggshells around your partner and conflict that arises in the relationship typically feels emotionally unsafe.

    14. Your emotional, financial, and/or sexual boundaries are not being respected in this relationship.

    signs of an unhealthy relationship
    Signs of an unhealthy relationship
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    Roxy Zarrabi, Psy.D

    Roxy Zarrabi, Psy.D., is a Clinical Psychologist who specializes in helping women struggling with low self-esteem, anxiety, or dating/relationship challenges to feel confident about themselves and the future of their relationships. She empowers clients to tap into their inner wisdom and utilize their strengths to combat their inner critic, boost their mood, and enhance their relationships. Her goal is to help people learn to create the meaningful lives they desire. She is the author of Mindful Dating, a Psychology Today blog about the psychology of attraction and relationship patterns. More information about her therapy services can be found at You can also stay updated on her latest freebies, updates, and blog posts by joining her email list here.View Author posts