One of the key things to learn in a lifetime is the creation of a right relationship with yourself so that you may experience a right and fulfilling relationship with other people. And essentially it is about the creation of oneness and unity in your inner relation with self, especially concerning your inner parent and your inner child relationship. When you are able to do that, you will have a greater capacity to have more fulfilling relationships with others in a sense of oneness as well.

To me the Self is the inner psyche, formed from the aspects of the inner child (subconscious mind), inner adult (conscious mind), and the eternal observer (super conscious mind), which is our divine essence, the source self. These aspects form and shape everything about us and our world. When we are disengaged from our inner aspects, we would often feel conflicted, doubtful, judgmental, generally unsure of the life’s purpose or direction, our relationships would be on the constant up and down spiral and even if generally things are OK, we would still feel deeply the aching sense of disconnection and longing, expressed with self sabotage or critical self judgment…

Many mistakenly believe that inner child aspect only holds our creative impulses and is there to teach us joy and enthusiasm, so when we connect with this aspect we could bring greater creativity and joy into our lives. Sadly, our inner child also holds all of our unacknowledged inner pain and all of our negative beliefs. And for this reason we instinctively hold back from doing or completing the most important inner work – taking responsibility and charge of our emotional and mental bodies.

Your inner child is where all of your feelings come from, all your reactions to any situation or person in your every day life – they all come from the perception of your inner child, it is the part of your subconscious mind that holds all of your beliefs about the self and the outside world. Your inner child needs are to be loved and nurtured, only then can this aspect reward you with all its innate magnificence and capacity for joy. It needs direction, otherwise it believes everything others have taught it to believe about the self and the world, which is mostly judgmental, fear based and untrue. This is where your inner parent comes in – your adult self with your faculties of conscious observation of the world around you and ability to make choices and decisions based on your true needs, wants and desires.

It is only half the truth that our thoughts shape our reality and define our perceptions of self and the world. In order to shape or create your reality you require energy, then by applying thought (belief, affirmation, intention etc) you can set that energy in motion. When it comes to creating your reality that energy comes from your emotions. In other words it is your inner child’s beliefs and perceptions that shape your present reality!

We might believe that the subconscious is difficult to reach and requires deep trance or hypnosis. Nothing could be further from the truth! Every time you feel an emotion you have a wide open door into your subconscious mind! And you can tell whether your subconscious is filled mostly with positive beliefs or negative ones by the way you generally feel in life. Your feelings and emotions are keys to your inner child’s heart and mind, so to speak. You can take charge of what kind of world your inner child resides in and what it should believe about the self and the world.

In our every day lives we are driven by the inner need to feel good. We seek to experience joy, fulfillment, happiness, enthusiasm, companionship, love. To me everything we do in life is a spiritual practice. By having a fulfilling inner relationship, achieving balance, harmony and oneness of our inner aspects, – we can allow our divine self full expression in to the physical world.

Whatever unpleasant or painful feeling you experience is an indication of a mistake your inner child holds within your subconscious mind. You can change that! Everyone out there is exactly the same, they have their own inner child with all its capacity for kindness and love, but also with whatever hidden inner pain that still remains.

Self love is the ongoing love and nurturing of the inner child, taking responsibility and charge of the emotional body and clearing of negative beliefs and self criticism within the mental body. Everything else unfolds from that!

© Olesya Marsh