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Nunchi: How This Traditional Korean Concept Can Help Build Better Relationships

Are you wondering why some people just light up the room from the moment they just walk in? Wondering how a stranger can read your mind so well? Do you wish to be quick-witted enough to instantly connect with people? Or have the ability to maintain harmonious relationships with everyone you are in contact with today? Then it’s time to get in touch with the traditional Korean concept Nunchi.

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  • Nunchi is a Korean word which means ‘eye measure’
  • It is a soft skill, a subtle art of gauging other people’s thoughts and feelings in order to build trust, harmony and connection

What is Nunchi?

Introduced to Koreas for about 2500 years ago with the teachings of Confucius, Nunchi also known as noonchi is an art and ability to tune into other people’s thoughts and feelings. In Korea, even children in their early years are well-aware of this concept.

The Korean philosophy encompasses how to ascertain others mood by being with them and communicating effectively in high context culture (where harmony and the well-being of the group is preferred over individual achievement). In Korea, personal relationships are more important than business. Thus, Nunchi is critical to strengthen interpersonal relationships and establish mutual trust.

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In Chinese culture, Nunchi means eye force/power, but the same in western culture is described as emotional intelligence. However, Euny Hong, the author of the book  The Power of Nunchi: the Korean Secret to Happiness and Success, says that emotional intelligence primarily focuses on tapping into other people’s feelings but people with nunchi can take the temperature of a room that they walk in and adapt their actions accordingly.  Nunchi relies on understanding your own status relative to the person with whom you’re interacting.

Related: 12 Ways To Improve Emotional Intelligence Through Self Care

People who lack nunchi are clueless, can’t understand the situation quickly, and doesn’t seem to have any common sense.

Understanding this wonderful philosophy will help a person to sense and relate with other people’s state of mind, get a base understanding of the person they met, build respectful rapport, and maintain harmony.

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According to Euny Hong, nunchi is well suited for modern life because it requires speed and adaptability to catch up with the fast-paced, digital world.

That’s absolutely right!!! 

Today we are living in a world where people add friends don’t make friends. Social media is ruling our lives so much that we focus more on others’ lives than our lifestyle, needs wants, and goals. Stress and anxiety have become our life partners and prevent us from reaching our full potential. In the quest to survive the cut-throat competition, we become more self-centered. Over time we become more individualistic and less empathetic to ourselves as well as others. We frequently encounter arguments with friends, misunderstandings, chaos, and conflicts. We fail to fit in diverse social situations. The situation is even worse when it comes to introverts.

Nunchi is a powerful technique to connect with yourself, control your mind, build harmonious relationships, avoid chaos, stay grounded in a stressful situation, and strengthen personal, social, and professional life. 

Unlike most western countries that emphasize autonomy and individualism, nunchi emphasizes unity, collectivism, and relationship-building. 

In short, Nunchi is the path to a better life!!! It’s a getaway to become healthier and happier. 

Related: What Makes You Happy? Harvard Study Finds #1 Way To A Good Life

Nunchi seems to have played a great role in the rapid development of Korea and its transformation from a poor nation to a high-income nation just in few generations. Not just economic stability but Korea has also emerged as a culturally powerful nation.   

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But, what is the right approach to Nunchi?

Author Euny Hong in her book mentioned that nunchi is the art of using five senses along with sixth sense to understand others; ideas, thoughts, and feelings. 

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Louisa Davis
Hi there! I'm just a normal person enjoying the process of life. Practicing Buddhism, I believe in the law of cause and effect. Reading and writing is always a pleasure. I enjoy researching on a range of subjects – science, psychology, and technology. Nothing can satiate my soul than good music, horror movies, psycho-thriller, and crime stuff. I enjoy photography, music and watching comedy videos. Talking to people, learning new experiences, sharing my knowledge through blogs, motivating others are things that I always look forward to.
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