Love Yourself Enough That You Are Okay Disappointing People

Love Yourself Enough Okay Disappointing People

“Love yourself enough that you are okay disappointing people.” – I said that to a coaching client yesterday and I think it’s a really important concept to understand and fully grasp.

We sometimes hold back our truth because we are scared the other person won’t be able to handle it, that it will be too much for them, that WE will be too much for them and they’ll pull or push away. So we bite our tongues and we bottle it up, keeping secrets inside locked up tight.

Occasionally, we throw away the key and convince ourselves this is how it must be, but what we’re really saying when we do this is three separate things. ⁣

Related: The Art Of Self-Love

Love Yourself Enough That You Are Okay Disappointing People

First, “I don’t want you to feel bad when you hear this, so I’ll choose to feel bad by not saying it. I will hurt so you won’t.” We sacrifice ourselves so they won’t feel pain, but in doing so, we collect hurt that isn’t ours to carry.

Unnecessary burdens become best friends until the bitter end. And it will end bitterly because there is no happy ending for carrying unnecessary pain. It will slowly eat us away inside, manifesting as anxiety, depression, self-doubt, and despair until we become brave enough to really share how we feel, what we want, and who we are.

Love yourself enough
Loving yourself and speaking your truth

Second, “I don’t think you’re strong enough to deal with this.” When we judge people as not brave enough, ready enough, or strong enough to deal with us, we deny that person a chance to grow, to step up, to improve, and to deal with the heaviness that life sometimes provides.

By withholding our truth we deny them a chance to prove their own strength and in doing so, we keep them weak. Read that again.⁣ And maybe once more.

Often times we are so focused on ourselves and our pain that we neglect to reflect on the opportunities we bring to the table when we share wholeheartedly with others. Truth is an invitation for their expansion and our connection.

Finally, we’re guessing that we know how they will think, act, or respond, but maybe we’ll be wrong. Maybe they’ll be proud of us for being honest.

Related: How to Love Yourself More (Even When Others DON’T)

Maybe it will all work out just fine. Maybe it will foster connection or intimacy. Maybe they are stronger than we think. Maybe they will surprise us in the best way possible. You never really know until you do it and your actions prove it.⁣

The real kind thing to do is just to speak your truth.⁣

Want to know more about how you can love yourself enough? Check this video out below!

Love yourself enough

Written By Jeremy Goldberg
Originally Appeared On Thought Catalog
Love Yourself Enough Okay Disappointing People pin

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



Up Next

5 Signs You Are Afraid Of Being Seen: Invisible Walls

Signs You Are Afraid Of Being Seen: Invisible Walls

Do you ever feel like you are afraid of being seen, and that’s why you have erected several walls around you so that no one can see your vulnerable side? This article is going to explore five signs you are afraid of being seen and what the fear of being seen really means.

Deep down, most of us want to be seen and accepted for who we are. Showing up fully in your relationships and allowing yourself to be seen is a vulnerable experience that requires you to let your guard down.

On the one hand, taking such a risk can feel incredibly anxiety-provoking, while on the other hand, not taking such a risk can cause your relationships to feel stagnant and block them from growing.



Up Next

Dating With Low Self Esteem? 6 Tips For Navigating The Dating Scene with Confidence

Dating With Low Self Esteem? Tips For Being More Confident

Ah, the exciting universe of dating! Dating in the modern world can feel like a rollercoaster filled with thrilling emotions and fluttering hearts. But what do you do when you suffer from low self esteem? What does it look like, dating with low self esteem?

Dating with low self esteem can feel as difficult as trying to solve a Rubik’s cube with one hand tied behind your back. Interactions may be marred by negative self-perceptions which can make you doubt your worth and desirability. However, don’t let that scare you, because low self-esteem does not necessarily mean doom.

In this article, we are going to t



Up Next

How Do Dogs Help with Depression: Exploring 5 Pawsitive Impacts!

How Do Dogs Help with Depression: Psychological Benefits!

The attachment that humans make with dogs goes beyond affability. To learn how do dogs help with depression is to consider not only the happiness they bring but also their deeper healing capacities for mental health

In the present fast-paced and challenging world where mental well-being is as important as physical fitness. The connection between humans and dogs is both ancient and deep. For centuries these creatures have been more than pets; they have been trusted friends, company during difficult times, unfailing love, etc.

This articl



Up Next

What Is Dismissive Avoidant Attachment: 5 Alarming Traits And Ways To Cope

What Is Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Style: Traits

Are you or someone you care about finding it tough to open up about feelings and build close connections with others? Despite your best efforts, you seem to self-destruct in relationships.  If these scenarios sound familiar, you might be dealing with what is dismissive-avoidant attachment

This pattern often begins in early childhood and is not something one can consciously control. Individuals with a dismissive-avoidant attachment style might not fully understand why they face challenges in relationships or tend to distance themselves from intimacy.

The good news is that there are ways to navigate and overcome these struggles. In this article, we’ll delve into the dynamics of dismissive-avoidant attachment, offering insights and st



Up Next

What Does It Mean To Be Autosexual? 6 Signs You Are Sexually Attracted To Yourself

What Does It Mean To Be Autosexual? Signs You Might Be One

In a world that is constantly growing and changing, especially when it comes to sexual orientation and identity, it’s important to come to terms with all the different ways humans can be human. Some people see themselves in the mirror and feel deep love and attraction. Well, that might be a sign of autosexuality. But what does it mean to be autosexual?

They don’t need someone to tell them they are attractive, but those people exist, and something like that has a name — autosexuality. Rather than caring about others, this orientation looks directly at one’s own pleasure sexually.

In this article we will



Up Next

How Prioritizing Self Care During The Holidays Can Make You Feel Better: 6 Effective Techniques

Practicing Self Care During The Holidays: Useful Tips

The holiday season can be really stressful to deal with at times, which is why it is very important to prioritise and practice self care during the holidays. Holiday self care is not just important, it’s essential. So, how to practice self care during the holidays? Let’s find out!

KEY POINTS

According to one study, 38% of people say the holidays cause more stress, depression, and anxiety.

Sleep is important because the brain needs it to function effectively, efficiently, and productively.

Before overextending oneself, it is best to be aware that the effort may not result



Up Next

8 Mental Health Tips For The Holidays To Keep You Sane and Happy

Cheer And Comfort: Mental Health Tips For The Holidays

The holiday season is that time of the year when you are surrounded by love, joy, and your loved ones. However, the holidays can also cause a lot of stress, anxiety and overwhelm and take a toll on your well-being. That’s why we have come up with some really useful mental health tips for the holidays that will help you will stay sane and have a good time!

People dealing with mental illness during the holidays have a harder time than others when it comes to handling holiday stress and the pressures associated with it. But does that mean you will never enjoy the holidays in your life? Of course not!

If you want to enjoy the holidays to the fullest, then you need to take care of yourself and your mental and emotional well-being. These practical tips will greatly help you handle