How can I be more likable without being too desperate? How To Be Likeable? How can I be more charismatic so that others accept me openly? If you have been wondering how you can be more liked and appreciated, then we are here to help.
We all want to be liked! We can’t really help it. Being liked and respected by others, especially the people we care about helps to boost our self-esteem & confidence and improves our mental & emotional health.
No wonder, we often think about how we can become more likable. Do we need to be more polite? Or should we be more funny?
Well, the answer might be a little more complicated than that.
Likability is a trait that most of us can learn to develop. While some of us are born charismatic and funny, the rest of us can become equally likable just with a little effort.
How To Be Likeable –
Here’s how you can become more likable and attractive to others –
1. Improve your communication skills
Communication is the bedrock of any relationship. How we communicate with others tells a lot about who we are. Developing strong communication skills will help you express yourself more clearly and connect with everyone you meet.
Wondering how to communicate better? We’ve got you covered.
A. Talk more, but meaningfully
Talk more often and share your knowledge and experiences on different topics with others. The more people get to know about you, the more they will like you. Add real value to conversations.
B. Be respectful towards others
Be gentle and polite in your daily interactions, whether it’s with your loved ones or strangers. Avoid criticizing or judging people. Treat everyone with respect and others will connect with you more positively.
C. Control your insecurities
Never criticize yourself in front of others and always hold yourself in high regard without being arrogant or rude. Don’t let your insecurities affect how you communicate. Speak confidently and honestly and be assertive. People will treat you the way you treat yourself.
D. Listen actively without interrupting the other person
Genuinely listen to what the other person has to say, use body language and verbal cues to respond appropriately. When you listen empathetically and without judgment, you will learn more about the other person and build a deeper connection.
2. Develop a positive attitude
Would you like to be friends with someone who is grouchy and is in a bad mood all the time? Probably not, right? We like to be around people who make us feel good… people who are similar to us. When you are positive and happy, more people will be attracted to you.
Happiness is contagious. So…
A. Smile and laugh out loud
Smile more often when you meet people. Studies show that smiling with your teeth displayed is considered as most attractive and aesthetic by others.
B. Turn off your ego
If you want to be liked, accept when you are wrong, apologize when you should and avoid correcting people. Don’t take yourself seriously and have the courage to laugh at your flaws. Trying to prove others wrong will not help you make new friends.
C. Be more open and approachable
Make eye contact, uncross your arms, keep your phone aside and be warm when interacting with others. Have a relaxed body language, pay attention to people and show genuine interest. The more welcoming you are, the more people will like you.
D. Mirror people
Mirroring is a body language technique to increase attraction and rapport. When talking to someone, copy their facial expressions, gestures, posture and stance. The sameness in your body language will subconsciously make the other person like you.
3. Build desirable habits
While we may mistakenly believe that most people are born with traits that make them likable, you can actually learn certain habits that can make you more attractive, pleasing and charismatic. Your likability depends on your emotional intelligence (EQ).
To be emotionally intelligent, you need to develop certain habits, starting with….
A. Being your most genuine self
Instead of trying to pretend to be someone you are not, show people who you truly are. People naturally like someone who is not afraid to show their authentic personality, as long as you are respectful. Embrace yourself in all your flawed glory.
B. Be naturally kind and empathetic
Show kindness even to strangers. Being kind and considerate shows people that you have their best interests at heart. When you behave kindly and compassionately, you will inspire others and they will gravitate towards you.
Read Empathy Vs Sympathy: How To Practice True Empathy
C. Don’t hesitate to ask for a favor
Studies show that when you ask someone to do something nice for you, it can actually make them like you more. Known as the Ben Franklin Effect, when someone helps you, they will be more willing to help you again as it makes them feel good.
D. Be presentable and hygienic
Would you like to be friends with someone who looks like a hobo? While you don’t need to look like a movie star, it is important that you appear presentable when approaching people. So pay close attention to your personal hygiene, style and posture.
4. Be a people person
If you want to be liked by others, you have to like being around people. Having great people skills can make you more lovable, charismatic and amusing to others. When you are a people person, others will like you naturally and will want to be around you.
So how can you be a people person? We have your back.
A. Like people to become likable
If you don’t enjoy being around people, then chances are people won’t enjoy being around you. When you appreciate someone’s presence and openly enjoy being around them, without being needy, they will feel the same about you.
B. Openly praise and compliment people
Everyone likes to be validated and reassured. But when you criticize and judge someone, they will start avoiding you. When you genuinely compliment someone on their positive qualities, they will associate you with positive emotions and reaffirmation.
C. Don’t be obsessed with yourself
Don’t talk about yourself all the time. Don’t act like you are better than everyone else. Don’t abuse others. Always keep the focus on the other person during conversations and talk about THEM. If you want people to like you, then make it about them, not about you.
D. Don’t seek attention
No one likes an attention seeker. When you become desperate for attention, you will push people away from you. Never force someone to like you. Instead pay attention to others and people will appreciate you a lot more.
What do you like in other people?
Is it their confidence? Their sense of humor? Or their ability to make you feel good about yourself?
Developing the ability to become more socially desirable can add a lot of value to your relationships, career and social life. Being likable can boost your self-esteem, make you more confident and empathetic.
While not everyone we meet may like us, we can certainly learn to be more charming and attractive so that we can make more friends naturally.
Want to share your wisdom with the world?
References:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30047777/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30047777/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8734643/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9469973/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17685777/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2719285/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26392141/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2862496/
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