This part of us is often referred to as the inner critic. And the inner critic can be ruthless. Especially if it has fed on other human voices that haven’t approved of your looks or physical beauty. This side of us is intrinsically connected with our primary years, and what our primary caregivers made us feel about ourselves. The self-critical voice, once you’ve registered its presence, needs to be worked upon.
I’m not saying easy, but with enough mindfulness and rigour you can develop alternate voices that can counter the harsh criticism that comes from this side of you.
4. Evolve your personality
In the quest of beauty and physical attractiveness, we often forget something that’s equally or even more important. Our personality. The one thing that shines through whether we are popularly considered beautiful or not. Our personality is a sum total of our experiences, our skills, how we engage with ourselves and what we bring to the world.
Though this is a rough summation of the whole gamut of possibility, you can imagine that our personalities do need work and given the attention it deserves, can be our prime focus and also of those we come in contact with. It is a lifetime worth of commitment and change can be indeed slow, but as many seekers have recounted, it is a path that only allows for more growth and acceptance.
5. Come to see it like a journey
Coming to terms with something the world at large questions, is difficult. To believe that acceptance will come from outside and then make its way inside, is setting yourself up for disappointment. The journey has to start within until acceptance is such a given, that most people around you won’t question your stance. Accept that coming to terms with the gap between reality and expectations, takes time.
If you consider yourself unattractive, it’s probable that you secretly crave for acceptance from the world around and keep hoping the air clears out for you to be who you exactly are. For that to happen, the journey for you to accept yourself must begin.
You might see old patterns of thinking again and again, but the point of developing self-awareness is to accept it all, as it emerges.
While working on strategies to come to terms with how you look, it’s vital that you remember all those things that work in your favour. It could be your humour, the way you quickly make connections or even the way you make people feel eased in social circles.
Making space for what works on your behalf while you begin implementing the coping strategies, can be helpful and much less overwhelming emotionally.
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