An INFJ has a dark side that is less talked about. Great names like Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, and Nelson Mandela were the likes of INFJ Personality type. But yet again, INFJs play a host to the darker figures like Adolf Hitler and Osama Bin-Laden.
All these people were passionate about what they did. They were in fact extremely passionate for a cause that they believed was good, true, and just. Something that I’m sure many of us can relate to.
INFJs are often typecast as the non-emotional person with a calm exterior but what belies is the seething mass of emotions and thoughts being played out.
Considering an individual’s life experiences and maturity level, INFJs can be polar opposites, whether perceived as good or evil, deep within they have a wave of emotions ready to drown the toughest. INFJs are factually correct and would do things only if they believe in them.
However, I’d still like to delve a little further into the dark side of the INFJ personality type. Taking notice of a few things that INFJs typically struggle with.
The Dark Side Of The INFJ Personality Type
Even if you think that INFJs are calm and content, the real inside of us can be difficult to understand. Our mind is constantly fighting with our emotions and at times it gets hard to cope with all the side effects. Nearly always, we are very reserved with our feelings and do not want to share for the fear of not being correctly understood.
Even when we do talk about how we feel, we keep apologizing. But the need to confide in someone is always way too strong. Sometimes when we talk about our deep feelings, we expect others to listen and not be judged. We may not share our feelings with anyone who criticizes or gives too much advice.
Change is inevitable, but INFJs have a tough time accepting the change. This is often considered as being stubborn. We tend to plan things way too much into the future.
We plan things till the end of time, but unfortunately, not everything happens as planned. This obviously makes all the planning futile. Accepting this situation becomes uneasy and the mind becomes restless. Facing reality does take time, but if given enough time for the mind to settle with truth, we can get along with life and accept things for what they are.
3. Shadow of Stress
INFJs are not comfortable when forced to use their Sensing capabilities. Making a “sensing mistake” that involves facts or details can make us “annoyed or defensive. On a small level, stress can cause us to focus obsessively on external data making us irritable and obsessive.
Stress can also make us overindulge in sensual pleasures like overeating, shopping for things we don’t need, and generally becoming self-centered. On a larger level, stress makes us take an adversarial attitude toward the outer world. The third is a defensive response to feeling like the entire world is spinning out of control.
Stress isn’t the only thing that can bring out an INFJ’s dark side, conflict can also be the trigger. When our inner values are questioned, we might become extremely harsh and rude. But when we are wronged, we deal with patience, and even when hurt inside, we try to stay calm.
It is when this negative energy piles up, we react. Such a reaction might be at a time of minor conflict and might feel like a sudden explosion of anger. But the frustration was built up in course of time which happens to burst out on a simpler thing. In such a situation, we might not be able to control what we say.
We might speak ill and use heart piercingly strong words. If we could speak up when such minor offenses occur, we would be able to prevent such violent anger explosions.