Being positive is an important key to having a fulfilled and content life. But too much of anything is bad, and the same goes for positivity. Trying to feel positive, no matter what, can end up doing more harm than good to you, and the more you understand the dangers of toxic positivity, the better off you will be.
Sometimes I read something where someone says: “good vibes only over here.” And I think to myself, that’s actually impossible and unrealistic. Furthermore, it’s also detrimental to think that way. Here’s why:
Toxic Positivity As Good Vibes Only
Nothing in life exists purely from the space of “good vibes” or “pure light” only. Secondly, to hold oneself to that standard is not only unfair, but it creates an unrealistic fantasy that inevitably leads to heartbreak, feelings of failure, and not feeling like you are ever enough/something is wrong with you. It sets you up for disappointment because achieving “good vibes only” means abandoning the truth of your own soul —where there are not just good vibes, but all kinds of vibes present.
“Spiritual bypassing” happens when you pretend to be somewhere you’re not in order to avoid being where you are. There is nothing more hurtful to your soul’s experience than pretending, wearing masks, or placing yourself into an unrealistic fantasy —in order to meet the standards the world has set for you. Doing this leads to heartbreak because no one can actually live up to that standard while remaining true to themselves.
Truth: In life, there is no light without dark. This is true about anything real on Earth, and in the spiritual world too. This also includes everything that is considered divine or conscious. Consciously evolving or coming into a space of healing or love or ascension only happens by addressing the dark —what we don’t see.
Our blind spots are often riddled with pain, fear, misunderstanding, abandonment, or heavy grief. To address the dark is what’s actually divine. It’s okay to feel as though something is heavy or dark… that’s a reflection of reality. Reality can be dark and painful. It’s inauthentic to your experience if you choose to believe otherwise.
Addressing the dark and holding space for the dark and looking at the dark is how you become who you are meant to be. Pretending you don’t have any dark is deciding to keep blinders on.
Pretending there is no darkness at all robs you from seeing deeper truths within and around you. It keeps you sleeping while you remain burdened by carrying the voice of the world, which will never be a true reflection of your own voice within.
For example: If you’re feeling depressed, but you believe you’re supposed to be zen all the time —so that’s how you’re acting instead, you’re not properly honoring where you are or connecting to the truth within you or to what your current experience is trying to teach you, which is instead creating something inauthentic.
This is what it means to wear a mask, and others will pick up on it. They’ll reflect the discomfort of your mask back to you by showing you feelings of discomfort when they are around you. This is just showing you how uncomfortable it is for you to be with your mask instead of choosing to go deeper into your truth.
The reason this happens is that we often buy into thoughts that promote “high vibe” and “this is how to be successful” messaging with language that directly or indirectly insinuates “dark is bad,” and speaking in only “love and positivity” is all that is acceptable.
When you consume these messages, you will inevitably internalize this voice and pretend that voice is yours —which doesn’t leave any space for your authentic voice to shine through to you. Doing exactly that is what disconnects you even further from your truth. It serves as a blockade, which your soul is unable to reach you through.