17 Connections Between A Narcissist And Their Victim With Anxiety Disorder

Connections Narcissist and Victim With Anxiety Disorder

14. A narcissist will maliciously take you down but manipulate you in such a way you don’t even realize they’ve done it or have triggered you. While someone with anxiety doubts themselves more.

It’s a snide comment that will ruin your day. Something said about the way you look. And when you tell a narcissist, ‘I don’t like that you said that’ or ‘I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say those things in the future,’ instead of having empathy for you, they realize they got to you and they mark it as a win for them. They respond to whatever you might say with, “well it’s true isn’t it?”

Someone with anxiety then starts to believe it. When a narcissist has insecurities they mask it by making others feel worse than they do.

15. A narcissist will continue to test you and push boundaries while someone with anxiety allows it.

As long as you let them get away with things, they are going to keep pushing you closer and closer to the edge. And the thing about people with anxiety is they have a lot of tolerance and even more resilience when it comes to everything.

You ask someone with anxiety why they are tolerating treatment like they and not putting their foot down and they’ll tell you it isn’t worth it because someone like that really isn’t worth any more of their time and attention. They try so hard to just heal the best they can.

16. A narcissist uses emotional abuse to silence you while someone with anxiety then silences themselves.

Narcissistic abuse is so much about messing with your head so there isn’t concrete evidence someone can look back at and say, ‘you’ve done this, here is proof.’

When there is physical abuse, there are marks and bruises and you know it’s not right.

When it’s emotional abuse it’s all about the interruption. While a narcissists motive might have been to take you down verbally, days pass, they forget what happened and they say something like ‘you were being too sensitive.’ Again. reverting to denial of fact vs. fiction.

A narcissist wins when their victim becomes silent about the abuse. And someone with anxiety reverts to silencing themselves in any and all situations because there is blame projected upon themselves that they shouldn’t take ownership of but they do.

17. Everything is about control and this is where a narcissist and someone with anxiety have the greatest conflict.

The greatest issue a narcissist has against someone with anxiety is the battle for control. Someone with anxiety wants to control everything because anxiety is something they can’t control. A narcissist wants to control the individual because their own sense of worth and value is how they influence others and can control them. But someone with anxiety doesn’t want to be controlled.

Related: Trauma Bonding: Why We Stay In Abusive Relationships

Eventually, the victim with anxiety learns to pull away and control parts of their own life but there are always things they take with them that were a result of narcissist abuse.

How they handle confrontation.
How they view themselves.
How they talk to themselves.
How they choose partners.
How they fold when fighting.
How they apologize too often.
How they are always anxious.
How they fear abandonment.
How they repress emotions.
How they blame themselves for everything.

The relationship between a narcissist and a victim with anxiety may be looked at as cause and effect. But anyone who can overcome both the demons within themselves and a toxic relationship is stronger than any person I know.

Written By Kirsten Corley
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17 Connections Between A Narcissist And Their Victim With Anxiety Disorder
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17 Connections Between A Narcissist And Their Victim With Anxiety Disorder

2 thoughts on “17 Connections Between A Narcissist And Their Victim With Anxiety Disorder”

  1. I’m a 64 yr. old woman. We’ve been married for almost 46 yrs. His Mom, from the beginning would tell him I had another man, and she would call me a whore. I should have spoken up. I left it to him to speak to her and tell her that none of this is true. It was a slow process for us. He’s a crier and when I would ask if he talked with her, he would start crying and tell me how bad his life was at home, which I completely understand. He went from telling me he would talk to her and make her stop, to saying “Well, you are just taking what she said wrong,” then to say, she didn’t mean it like that. I would ask, how can I be taking it wrong when she says I have another man and calls me a whore. No answer. His Mom would have fits and all the 7 kids would come in to soothe her, which was weird to me, but I said nothing. She is dead and now there’s nothing that can be done. So I just let it go. About 5-6 yrs. ago he told someone about how wonderful his parents were and that they didn’t do anything wrong to anyone. After someone dies, it’s probably normal to overlook lots of things. I asked him why he would lie to someone about that. I said, I don’t expect you to run them down, but why would you lie. He said “I didn’t lie” I said, you know what she did to you as a child and to myself after we were married. He said, she NEVER done or said anything wrong to you. I said ” you were there in the same room when she said those very ugly things.” He said she never said anything bad to you or said anything. He proceeded to tell me that I made ALL that up. He said ” you Misunderstand everything.” This was when my eyes were opened to his abuse. I, in the past would just let it go cause he would cry about how she abused him with words. I’ve examined my life since then. How could I let this happen. Why did I let her and him get away with this. About 15 yrs. ago, his sister came to US and told US that she was part of the plan to get rid of me from the beginning, along with another sister and their Mom. She said she finally realized that what their Mom was saying was a lie. She asked me to forgive her and I gladly did. I never knew this was happening even thought It certainly felt that way, but who does this to someone. I was always shy and I never slept around or did things like that. I told him we need to talk about this. He would say I’m going to bed {We haven’t slept together for about 12 yrs., because of his snoring, which he can’t help. I have told him for yrs. to get help for his snoring, he NEVER did, which tells me that he don’t care if he sleeps with me or not.} His other excuses for not talking was I’m going hunting or I’m going to town and etc. I wanted to see a marriage counselor and he said NO. He said, we don’t have any problems. I kept trying to communicate and all he would do is give excuses. So, I just quit trying and started to make arrangements to live in a low income Senior facility, based on my S.S. We’re not poor or rich, Our money is in his name only, which tells you how much I trusted him. We did finally see a counselor, but he just made more excuses and cried and said I was lying on him and his family. He throws me under the bus often. I’m making my life better and I’m glad my eyes were finally opened. I have a lot of work to do, I’m getting a job for support. I’m working out and getting stronger. I was always independent. I don’t know how or when I lost myself.

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