“Genuine love is precious, and those who are capable of genuine love know that their loving must be focused as productively as possible through self discipline.” –M.Scott Peck
I know that we don’t like to hear love and discipline in the same sentence.
But if you knew the power of genuine love and held it with reverence, you would not squander it and that’s exactly why we need self-discipline.
Discipline to choose partners who are worthy recipients of the genuine love, discipline to choose partners who have the potential to grow and evolve with all the nurturing you have to offer and also the discipline to move on from partners we outgrow.
It can be a painful realization to know that you have outgrown your partner or to see that you are stuck in a dead-end relationship.
But it is so important to not get stuck with a dead end relationship and move on and find someone who is a worthy recipient of all that you have to offer.
So, if you have a gut feeling or nagging instinct that you are stuck in a dead end relationship, read on to find the obvious signs.
Here is a list of ten obvious signs that you are in a dead end relationship
1. They don’t feature in your future plans
Everyone has goals and vision about how they want their future life to look like.
Someone could aspire to go backpacking in Europe and someone could aspire to open a yoga school or someone to start his own company. If you find that you can’t envision your partner alongside you in your vision of your future life, then, it’s a clear sign that you are stuck in a dead end relationship and you have no inkling to move forward with this person.
2. You’re acting more like a savior than a partner
A relationship is a partnership between two equals. Both of them have a fairly balanced give and take in terms of love, support and affection.
But if you feel like you are the only one who is providing support and affection to the other person and acting more like a savior than a partner, then you seriously need to rethink your relationship.
If you are constantly trying to fix or change your partner, then it’s a serious incompatibility red flag.
It clearly shows that you don’t like them as they are now.
You want them to be in a different job or a career, you want them to be more outgoing and adventurous, you want them to be more intellectual and deep and are constantly trying them to up level, then you don’t love them, you love the image or potential you have in your head of them.
While none of us is perfect and we should support our partner to blossom into their highest potential but if we don’t like them at all for who they are right now and are constantly trying to fix them, it’s a lost cause, you’re just not compatible and you should probably move on!
3. There’s no trust in the relationship
Trust is the single most important factor in a strong, fulfilling and long lasting relationship.
Some people can have trust issues because of what happened in their past or due to something that happened in their current relationship.
But till a person heals and resolves the issue he would just sabotage even a good and loving relationship.
If you feel like you don’t trust your partner or they don’t trust you even after trying to resolve the issues, then sweetheart you need to think long and hard “Do you want to be in a relationship that has no trust?”
4. You’ve been together for a while and your partner is reluctant to commit
A relationship has different stages. In the initial stages, both the partners are trying to figure out if there is any compatibility and if they would like to take this relationship to the next level.
The next stage could be anything depending on which stage of a relationship you guys are at.
It could be moving in together or planning to get married or having kids.
But if you have spent considerable time with your partner and they are undecided about what they want to do and where they want to take the relationship.
Avoiding commitment at all costs is a clear sign that the relationship is not going to last long.