Signs of Codependency in Relationships


Signs of Codependency in Relationships

Dear Advocates:

Part of learning how to have healthy relationships is also being able to recognize signs of abuse in your current relationships. To begin with, I would like to review some information about narcissism; this is because I believe that narcissism is one of the most subtle, hidden forms of abuse out there.My daddy was a narcissist, and I suffered under his hand for 24 years of my life. Please consider this information as lessons learned from my pain, so that you don’t have to suffer unnecessarily in yours. Consider this my gift to you, one that I suffered to give:

Narcissism creates an atmosphere of codependency. This means that in a relationship with a narcissist, you will often find yourself thinking thoughts like, “I just can’t do this without them”, or, “I’m totally incapable without this person’s help”.

Now, those don’t immediately sound like bad thoughts, but let me expose the truth: true love doesn’t create codependency. True love recognizes its strengths and weaknesses and resolves to improve both, not become stagnant and placing responsibility on another. True love says things like, “I flourish with this person’s help, but I know if I just keep going, I can get through this”, or, “This person’s love inspires me to push myself harder”.

Narcissism wants you to be dependent and incapable of moving or making decisions without it. In a relationship with a narcissist, that person will often become upset if they think that you’re doing things without their permission, or if they think that you think you’re better off without them. That’s because in order to operate, narcissism needs prey it can feed on; feeding on the host itself is never enough. Narcissism works overtime to create victims that don’t even know they are victims.

Read What The 12 Zodiac Signs Hate About Their Last Relationship

“He said he loved her without counting the cost. She thought without his love, she would be lost.”

The narcissist will say and do anything to entrap their prey. They will say they love you, yet deeply down, they haven’t truly counted the cost of what those words will mean to the other person. The narcissist only has perception and vision for themselves.

The victim of narcissism will take those words, bury them deeply within their hearts, and believe that without that love, they are nothing. Victims of narcissism often believe they are damaged goods and simply “lucky” enough to be loved by the abuser. Victims of narcissism will often have a low opinion of themselves, therefore it is extremely easy for them to become codependent on the narcissist. Why? Narcissists are very often confident and charismatic, having a charm that draws the unsuspecting victim inward.

Read 7 Common Myths About Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Here are some warning signs of codependency and narcissistic abuse in relationships”

1. You feel helpless without the other person.

2. Your self-confidence is low and you feel as though you need the other person to lift you up.

3. You feel like you’re walking on eggshells constantly.

4. You’re afraid to make choices without the other person.

5. You feel like you don’t know what to do unless the other person is directing you.

6. You second guess yourself constantly because you believe the other person is smarter and more capable than you.

7. Your finances are pooled together, yet you never have free access to your own money.

8. The other person gets their way all the time and you find yourself frequently giving up your own will, without reciprocation.

9. The atmosphere is dominated by the other person.

10. The other person always decides what you eat when you’re together.

11. The other person always chooses the music you listen to when you’re together.

12. The other person is controlling over what your appearance is like, how you talk, and who you hang with.

13. You have trouble identifying your own feelings and often rely on the other person for emotional direction.

14. These are only but a few of the warning signs of codependency in relationships. Do any of them sound familiar to you? Maybe you’re not the one suffering, but the one causing the suffering?

15. Narcissism can be healed, but only after it is revealed.

If any of these warning signs resound with you, then take some major reflection time and reassess the health of your relationships. Remember, narcissists are dangerous and feel easily threatened. If you don’t feel safe in your relationship, then it’s a good sign that it’s time to either put some renovation into it, seek counsel, or, if the danger level is too high, GET OUT. If you have any questions, I’m always here to help. Getting out of a narcissistic relationship can be one of the toughest things you ever accomplish, but you don’t have to do it alone. I don’t want you to be like the old me, feeling trapped, scared, and unsure of yourself and your worth.

-Gavi, Your Advocate for Healthy Relationships

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Up Next

5 Characteristics Of Codependency And Types Of Codependents

Characteristics Of Codependency And Types Of Codependents

Let’s dive into the world of codependents’ by exploring the key characteristics of codependency and it’s different types. Ready to get some clarity on this often-misunderstood topic?

In todays Best Day Blog article I am going to talk about the two types of codependents and the five traits of codependency.

Codependency is a term that is used to describe a psychological disorder that revolves around a need for dependence on others. There are two types of codependents: the typical disempowered and the less known falsely empowered codependent.

By understanding the two types of codependents and the five traits of codependence, you can start to understand your own codependent tendencies and improve your relationship with yourself.

Each codepe

Up Next

Codependence and Interdependence: What Truly Sets Them Apart?

Codependence and Interdependence: What Truly Sets Them Apart?

The question ‘What is the difference between codependence and interdependence?’ In reality, it asks whether a relationship is dysfunctional or healthy. Well, in today’s Best Day Blog, I will be taking you through the differences between the two and how to recover from codependency.

Dysfunctional Relationships

I talk a lot about what dysfunctional relationships can look like, but how do you develop a healthy relationship, and what does a healthy one look like?

Unfortunately, the idea of relationships we all grow up with from movies and TV is unhealthy. The relationships shown are romanticized

Up Next

How to Recognize and Overcome Toxic Codependency: Understanding the Signs and Causes

Toxic Codependency: Signs, Causes, and How To Break Free

Does it sometimes seem to you like you cannot function without someone or that they can’t without you? Well, this is called toxic codependency. It happens when relationships become disproportionate and one person depends too heavily on the other for emotional or psychological support. Let us now explore how we can identify and move away from this destructive cycle.

What is toxic codependency?

Toxic codependency is a negative interpersonal pattern where one person relies overly on another for emotional support, self-worth, and identity which often results in a controlling and manipulati

Up Next

5 Unrealistic Expectations In A Relationship That Can Destroy Love

Unrealistic Expectations In A Relationship That Ends Love

Having unrealistic expectations in a relationship is a sure way to kill it. It’s like giving importance to illusions more than reality. Do you want your relationship to thrive in the future? Here are 5 things not to do.

Unrealistic expectations in a relationship stem from unhealed trauma and damaged portions of our ego that seek validation.

If you choose to be mindful to understand all your emotions with time and patience, you will see half of them are your hidden fears accumulated over the years. You can analyze any situation based on facts before you mix fears and insecurities into it!

Up Next

Are You A Caretaker Or A Caregiver In Your Relationship? Understand The Difference Between Empathy And Codependency

Empathy And Codependency: Differences You Should Know

Ever wondered if you’re kind or codependent? Explore the fine line between empathy and codependency, learn to differentiate caretaking from caregiving, and take a revealing quiz to self-reflect!

Do you wonder whether you’re a kind, empathetic person or codependent? There is a difference between empathy and codependency. There are codependents who are abusers and not caring, and some people who are caring and aren’t codependent. So what’s the difference?

What Is Empathy And Codependency?

Up Next

Codependency or Love? 8 Signs Of Enmeshment In Romantic Relationships

Eight Signs Of Enmeshment In Romantic Relationships

Ever felt like you’re too close in your relationship? When two become one, where’s the “me” in the “we”? Welcome to the world of enmeshment in romantic relationships. It’s where deep love can sometimes feel like a tight squeeze. So, are you in a cosy embrace or a restrictive hold?

Join us as we shed light on these blurred boundaries and help you find your footing. It’s all about striking the right balance: being close yet maintaining your own space.

Ready to dive deeper into understanding enmeshment in romantic relationships and balancing your love connection? Let’s get started.