12 Signs He’s Not The One For You (Even If He’s A Good Guy)

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So things have not been that good and happy for the last couple of months, and something just seems off in your relationship, doesn’t it? No matter how much you try, that spark is not there anymore. You have been having second thoughts about your relationship, and you have even noticed signs he’s not the one for you.




He’s a good man, but you have a feeling that he’s not the one for you. Lately, it feels like you’re just going through the motions with each other, and you just don’t envision a forever future with him. It makes you feel sad and confused and you just don’t know what to think and what to do to understand the signs that he’s just not the one for you.

To do away with your confusion, we have made a list of signs he’s not the one for you, which will help you make a decision about whether you want to keep dating him or not.



Related: 8 Signs He Is Not Your Soulmate

12 Signs He’s Not The One For You (Even If He’s A Good Guy)

1. You can’t be yourself with him.

One of the biggest signs he’s not the one for you is if you find it hard and awkward to be yourself around him, and you’re always trying to impress him by being someone you think he will respect. You try to mold yourself according to his ideas and beliefs and do away with what you believe in.

All this just to make him happy and keep the peace. But that’s not how love works. A healthy relationship will never force you to be someone you’re not, and the person who will truly love you will accept you for who you are. He will never make you feel like you have to be someone else to make him happy.




signs he's not the one for you

2. You don’t have the same expectations regarding sex.

He might want to get into bed with you right after a few dates but you want more time; you want to hang out, go on more dates and know each other a bit better before you enter the bedroom. It might also happen that he isn’t interested in getting intimate with you at all.

Completely avoiding physical intimacy is not at all a good sign. At the end of the day, if both of you are never on the same page regarding sex, then he’s not the one for you.

3. You find it hard to communicate with him properly.

Communication is one of the primary and crucial pillars of a long-lasting relationship. If he doesn’t communicate with you often, if he doesn’t get back to you after the dates you had or doesn’t call you up at the end of the day, if you experience awkward silence when you are together, then these are some of the many warning signs he’s not the one.

You cannot ignore communication in a relationship, nor should you think that it’s possible to have a stable and happy relationship without it. Communication is one of the most important things in a relationship, and without it, it has no hope of standing the test of time.

Related: 15 Signs He’s Not The Right Man For You

4. You are always doing things differently from each other.

It’s true that opposites attract but there has to be some similarities and a certain degree of compatibility between the two of you, to make the relationship work. If he doesn’t like doing things the way you do and if you are not interested in his stuff, then it’s one of the biggest signs he’s not the one for you.




Being different people is fine and having your own individualism is great, but after a point, you need to be on the same page in certain circumstances. If you find yourself disagreeing with each other all the time and about every little thing, then it’s a sign that you’re not meant for each other.

5. You like the idea of having a boyfriend than actually having him as your boyfriend.

If you are in the relationship because you enjoy ‘having a boyfriend’ rather than ‘having him as your boyfriend’, then you’re with him for the wrong reasons, and it’s one of the biggest signs he’s not the one for you. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to keep your options open and dating around, but doing that while you are committed to someone is just plain wrong.

Why be in a relationship with someone, if you’re not interested in being loyal to him, and just want a ‘boyfriend’ in your life? Actually having a serious boyfriend is way better than using someone just because you like the idea of having a boyfriend.

6. You haven’t met his family and friends despite dating each other for quite some time.

How many times were you given excuses (and lame ones if you think about them!) whenever you broached the topic of meeting his friends and family? Does he always seem uncomfortable with this? Does he always try to deviate from the topic or react negatively?

It smells fishy, doesn’t it? If he doesn’t seem interested in making you meet his loved ones, then he’s not as serious about you as you think. If he refuses to take this next step with you, then it’s one of the signs he’s not the one for you, and you’re better off without him.

Related: 10 Biggest Signs He’s Just Not Into You

7. You feel disrespected, alone and unimportant when you’re with him.

One of the biggest warning signs he’s not the one for you is when he never leaves a chance to disrespect you and ignore you. Respect is one of the most important cornerstones of a healthy, happy relationship, and if your relationship doesn’t have that, it’s not worth it.




If he tries to manipulate you, belittle you, talk negatively about you in front of others, ignore you or reveal personal things about you and the relationship without your consent, then run for your life and never look back.

signs he's not the one for you

8. Your family and friends don’t like him at all.

Your loved ones love and accept you for who you are, and know you better than anybody else. So if they don’t seem to warm up to your boyfriend, there must be strong reasons behind that. Because they are on the outside, they might notice things about him that you don’t.

If they seem discouraging and concerned about the man you’re dating, then give it some serious thought. Don’t think they want you to be unhappy and alone, they’re just trying to look out for you. When your loved ones don’t like your boyfriend, there must be something wrong, and he is not the one for you.

9. You never have fun together.

If you can’t have fun with your boyfriend, then what’s even the point of the relationship? Every time you have plans of going out with him, and if you find yourself dreading it and wanting to cancel, then you’re not with the right person. You should feel excited and look forward to meeting him, instead of feeling unhappy.

This is one of the biggest signs he’s not the one for you. In happy relationships, couples want to be with each other whenever they can, and if you find yourself feeling bored and disinterested whenever you’re with him, then it’s clear he’s not the one for you.




Related: 6 Signs He Will Break Your Heart

10. You find yourself behaving like his mother, because he is immature.

Yes, most women seem to have a nurturing and caring personality, but that doesn’t mean you will have to babysit your boyfriend all the time. If he is immature and irresponsible, then he needs to work on it and behave in a mature way. If he doesn’t then it’s one of the major signs he’s not the one for you.

If he needs time to grow up and doesn’t seem interested in dealing with his Peter Pan Syndrome, then it’s not your responsibility to mother him and take care of him. You deserve someone who knows how to take care of himself and doesn’t expect you to babysit him all the time.

11. You find him emotionally unavailable.

He might give you a lot of time but if he is not emotionally available, then it’s one of the major signs he’s not the one for you. Being your better half means understanding your expectations and needs, and even after dating for a long time, he is unsure and hesitant about committing to you, then you deserve better.

There’s no point investing your time and energy in a relationship that has no future. He might be a good man, but if he is not willing to take things seriously, then you need to leave him and be with someone who is on the same page as you.

signs he's not the one for you

12. You don’t agree with each other about fundamental things.

It’s okay to be different and have different opinions and ideologies, but if you find yourself locking horns on even the most fundamental things, then he is not the one for you. If your beliefs and opinions regarding politics, religion, morality, family and personal values, and future plans are like chalk and cheese, then maybe you’re better off without each other.



This doesn’t make either of you bad people, it’s just that you are too different from each other. You need to agree about certain things in life, otherwise, you will keep on fighting with each other, and constant conflict will end up making you hate each other.

Related: 10 Signs He’s Not In Love, You Are Just Convenient

These are some of the biggest signs he’s not the one for you, and you deserve better. Even though it might hurt at first, in the long run, you’ll be happier because you should be with someone who understands where you come from and is compatible with you.


Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

How to tell a guy he’s not the one for you?

Honesty is the best policy when it comes to telling a guy that he’s not the one for you. Lying to him, avoiding him, or insulting him are not the right ways to break up with him. Be honest about your feelings and break things off respectfully.

How do you know when someone isn’t the one?

You don’t miss them when you’re apart, you disagree about everything, you cannot be your authentic self with them, you have to tread on eggshells around them and they are emotionally unavailable to you – these are some of the major signs that someone isn’t the one.

How do I find the right partner in life?

To find the right partner in life, you need to love yourself, understand what your deal-breakers are, be with someone with whom you can connect easily and be yourself, have similar values, and be with someone who is always there for you.


13 Signs That He’s Not ‘The One’ For You (Even If He’s A Good Guy)
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