How To Overcome FOMO (or Fear Of Missing Out) And Live In The Moment

Written By:

Written By:

How To Overcome FOMO 3

Fear of missing out or more commonly known as FOMO is a pervasive apprehension that others might be having rewarding experiences from which one is absent.ย 

Having constant access to our cellphones and the internet can be really helpful. We can check the weather, read the news, or learn about events, wherever we are.

But, because we now know of so many things that are going on in other placesโ€”online and in real lifeโ€”we can start to believe we are missing out on fun or important experiences. This feeling is referred to asย fearย of missing out, or FoMO, for short.

FoMOย can lead us toย get addicted to our phonesย orย hooked on social mediaย because we donโ€™t want to miss anything. Sure, these technology tools can be great for finding out about fun events, but if you have a potentially fun event right in front of you, FoMO can keep you focused on whatโ€™s happening elsewhere, instead of beingย fully present in the experience right in front of you.

Read How To Recover From Burnout When You Feel Unmotivated

As a result, you donโ€™t get the full benefit of your experiences and can evenย end up hurting your relationships.

How to deal with the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

Phones used to beย for making and receiving calls. But now they are being designed to hook you. You might getย addicted to your phoneโ€”the entertainmentย and the pangย of positive emotions when someone clicks โ€œLikeโ€ย on your post.ย Just as an addict would get great pleasure from consuming their drug of choice, we too get great pleasure from using our technologies. But both are just a distraction from real life, and both have the real potential to take us out of the present moment.

If you discover that you, like most of us, are using technology not as a tool to achieve some task, but as a way to cope with or distract yourself from some other experience, be prepared for a challenge up ahead.

When we become reliant on (or addicted to) something that changes our emotions, removing that something means that weโ€™ll have toย face those emotions, possibly for the first time in a while. This is very likely to result in cravingsโ€”Iโ€™ll just check my social media for a minute, whatโ€™s the harm?ย We might think.

If you think you might have trouble with technology cravings, you can try these deterrents:ย Set your lock screen on your phone with an image that reminds you not to go further. If you find that you skip through your lock screen, ignoring your reminder, as I did, you may need an extra layer of defense.

If this sounds like you, then put something on the outside of your phone to slow you down. You could attach a sticker to your phone or place a rubber band around it, a physical barrier that slows you down and reminds you not to proceed.

Similar approaches could be used with computers or video game consoles. The goal here is to create a mental or physical barrier that slows you down and makes you pause for a second to thinkโ€”Hey, do I really want to do this? With your improved awareness of the relationship you have to technology, youโ€™ll likely have more success moving forward and overcoming FoMO.

Take Text Time Outs

Texting with our friends can be goodย for our relationships and feelings of social connection. But if we are doing it all the time, it still pulls us away from being in the present moment. Is this happening to you?

A few years ago, aย friendย pointed out to me that many people, especially young people, sit with their phones between themselves and whatever is in front of themโ€”their computers, their entertainment, or another person who is speaking to them. In this position, youโ€™ll never miss anything that pops up on your phone, but your phone always has some of yourย attention, takingย you out of the present moment.

Messages, perhaps more than social media, feel like they need to be answered immediately, but you know what?ย They donโ€™t. By taking text time-outs, you can start to actually pay attention to whatโ€™s happening right in front of you.

Hereโ€™s what you do:

First, many phones have settings you can turn on to silence messages in a variety of ways. For example, you can turn messages off at night while youโ€™re sleeping (which I highly recommend), you can make it so texts only alert you a single time (which cuts the number of times you are interrupted by half if you currently have texts alert your twice per message), and you can silence all messages while you engaging in important experiences that shouldnโ€™t be interruptedโ€”like challenging work tasks, social events, or sleep.

Then move the phone away from you from some period of time.

Read Our Brains on Smartphones, (Un)social media, and Our Mental Health

Take Social Media Breaks

In our modern world, most of us need to use technology.ย How could we even function without our phones, computers?ย We might ask. Indeed, we might need technology for work, coordinating, and other practical uses, but the majority of us actuallyย donโ€™t need social media. We could get by with a lot less time spent on social media, and our well-being is likely to improve as a result.

This is good news because it turns out that the more we use social media, the more likely it is that we will experience FoMO.

Want to know more about FOMO? Check this video out below!

It may seem hard at first to take a social media breakโ€”maybe social media is the first thing we turn to on our phone or computer, but believe me, taking a break from social media is worth it.

When I first start to get an inkling that social media was hurting myย happiness, I quit outright and deleted my profile. I spent threeย blissful years on my first social media break. Now, I amย committed to developing a more positive relationship with social media. I take shorter breaks, often only a week-long, just to remind myself that the less I am on social media, the better I feel.

If you feel you can, try to take a full week off for your first social media break. And just keep at it. The less attached to your phone and social media you are, the less FoMO you are likely to experience.

References:

1. Baker, Z. G., Krieger, H., & LeRoy, A. S. (2016). Fear of missing out: Relationships with depression, mindfulness, and physical symptoms. Translational Issues in Psychological Science, 2(3), 275.
2. Tromholt, M. (2016). The Facebook experiment: Quitting Facebook leads to higher levels of well-being. Cyberpsychology, behavior, and social networking, 19(11), 661-666.
3. Przybylski, A. K., Murayama, K., DeHaan, C. R., & Gladwell, V. (2013). Motivational, emotional, and behavioral correlates of fear of missing out. Computers in Human Behavior, 29(4), 1841-1848.
Written by Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.
Originally appeared in Psychology Today

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you deal with FOMO and jealousy?

Accept that something great will always be happening somewhere and that you might not be included. Plan out ways to enjoy your free time and take time out from social media.

How do you get rid of FOMO in a relationship?

Accept your partner as they are and give them space. Talk about boundaries. Determine your goals and live in the moment. You might need to slow down, go on a social media detox, and/or see a therapist.

How to help a friend with FOMO?

Talk to your friend about boundaries and help them find out hobbies or activities that they would enjoy doing. Listen to them without judgment and reassure them often.

How can I help my family with FOMO?

Plan activities and outings with your family and try to get them to spend less time online. Encourage them to do things on their own, like going to the farmerโ€™s market, library, fishing, etc.


how to overcome FOMO pin
How To Overcome FOMO pin

— Share —

Published On:

Last updated on:

,

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

Philosophy as Self-Supervision: Reflecting on Psychological Practice

Philosophy As Self Supervision Important Key Points

How often do you pause and reflect on your own practice? Self supervision isnโ€™t just a tool, itโ€™s a philosophical approach for insight and growth. So let’s explore more!

How philosophical inquiry enhances self-awareness, reflection, and growth.

Key points

Philosophical reflection can be a tool for self-supervision.

Wonder and uncertainty can shape professional growth.

Philosophical inquiry can be integrated into everyday practice.

Up Next

Metacognition: The Key to Better Decision-Making

Metacognition: 3 Keys To Better Decision-Making

Have you ever wondered how you think? Metacognition helps you analyze your thoughts, improving decision-making. Let’s learn more about it!

Navigating above our ordinary thinking by using our rational thinking.

Key points

Metacognition is our thinking about our thinking.

It can help us make better decisions and navigate more easily through life.

Metacognition is the conscious process of being self-aware of the way in which we are thinking.

Up Next

Are You Making The Same Mistake Over And Over? Hereโ€™s How To Finally Stop!

Are You Making The Same Mistake Twice? Ways To Stop!

Weโ€™ve all been there. You swear you wonโ€™t do that again, whether itโ€™s sending a risky text, trusting the wrong person, overspending, or missing a deadline. And then, boom. You end up making the same mistake twice. 

The cycle repeats, frustration builds, and you wonder if youโ€™ll ever learn. But guess what? You can break free from the loop.

Habits, unconscious tendencies, and emotional biases cause us often to make the same mistakes. Even if seeking familiarity has unfavorable effects, our brains are programmed to do so.

We remain trapped in repetitive cycles due to a lack of self-awareness, a fear of change, and a failure to properly learn from prior experiences. Rather than addressing the underlying reasons of mistakes,

Up Next

How Many Aura Points Did You Just Lose? 5 Behaviors That Are Killing Your Vibe

How Many Aura Points Did You Just Lose? Behaviors That Are Killing Your Vibe

If youโ€™ve ever walked away from a conversation feeling like you absolutely won that interaction, congratulations, you just earned some aura points! But if youโ€™ve ever cringed at something you did and wished you could take it back, yeahโ€ฆ thatโ€™s a big deduction.

Let’s explore the philosophy behind this new Tik Tok trend!

What Are Aura Points?

Aura points are TikTokโ€™s new way of measuring how much rizz (aka charisma) you have, and itโ€™s not just about being smooth with your words. It’s less about being cool and more about being “aura”. Itโ€™s about self-respect, confidence, and knowing when to walk away from situations that donโ€™t serve you.

Up Next

Mindfulness And The Spirit of Buddhist Meditation

Mindfulness And The Spirit of Buddhist Meditation

Ever felt overwhelmed by your thoughts and emotions? What if you could train your mind to stay present, calm, and balanced? Learn more about Buddhist meditation below!

How mindfulness can help cultivate self-awareness and emotional regulation.

In recent years, mindfulness meditation, rooted in Buddhist traditions, has gained widespread interest in psychology and beyond. Amid a performance-driven culture, where achievement often outweighs presence, mindfulness offers a collective yearning for balance.

Up Next

The Psychology of Emotional Shopping

Psychology of Emotional Shopping: Important Ways To Tackle

You often buy things to lift your mood, but have you ever wondered why? Emotional shopping is more psychological than practical. So let’s learn more about it!

How to tackle a tendency toward emotional shopping.

In a globalized market, we are daily faced with a great variety of products and services that are meticulously planned and proficiently marketed to us, having an emotional influence on our brain centres and activating a desire to acquire them.

All of us want to experience the thrill of intense positive emotions that will raise the generation of our happy hormones which will eventually ensure the experience of such positive emotions as excitement, happiness, joy, glee, delight, hilarity, or amusement.

Up Next

Mel Robbinsโ€™ Viral โ€˜Let Them Theoryโ€™: Can It Really Transform Your Life?

Mel Robbinsโ€™ Viral โ€˜Let Them Theoryโ€™: Can It Really Transform Your Life?

The Let Them theory psychology is a simple yet powerful self help mantra made popular by Mel Robbins; a reminder that you canโ€™t control other peopleโ€™s actions, only your own reactions.

Is there anything more frustrating than other people? You try to control situations, influence decisions, and shape outcomes, but people keep doing whatever they want. Itโ€™s exhausting, isnโ€™t it?

You find yourself overanalyzing why someone didnโ€™t text back, why a coworker got a promotion instead of you, or why your friend refuses to leave that toxic relationship. You waste time, energy, and peace of mind obsessing over things that, frankly, arenโ€™t yours to control.

Instead of over analyzing, stressing, or trying to change things beyond your control, you simply let it be.