Skip to content

5 Reasons To Make Peace With Your Past

reasons to make peace with past

Are you still holding on to all the negative things that have happened in your past? If you are, then in order to be truly happy, you need to make peace with your past. The moment you let all the pain go, and make peace with them, your life will start to change for the better.

The fact is we all have a past and no one was perfect. Some things were painful and so it makes good sense that we remember them for learning and survival. This is how most of the animal kingdom works, we instinctively learn from experience. When we touch something hot and hurt ourselves we mentally log it and work to not do it again.

In this way remembering our past can shape our future very positively. The reality though is our past cannot perfectly predict our future and there are ways in which holding on to our past experiences can cause a limiting effect on us.

Related: 10 Tips To Let Go Of Your Painful Past

Here Are 5 Reasons To Make Peace With Your Past.

1. Making Negative Generalizations From One-Off Or Very Specific Experiences Can Indicate You’re Unnecessarily Limiting Potentially Joyful Experiences.

Using grandiose words like ‘always’ and ‘never’ when talking about something can be a tell-tale sign you’re applying a too generalized rule to something. Look around and see if others are having a different, more positive experience of something that you have written off?

2. Just As Our Past Can Remind And Inform Our Thoughts Of Something Unpleasant Our Nervous System Can Also Be Reminded.

In fact, our body can react the same to the thought of an unpleasant stimulus as it can to an actual stimulus.

If something from your past is causing you to feel guilt, shame, regret, or anger regularly you are putting unnecessary stress on your body and keeping it in a prolonged tense state which is not good for your health or mindset.

Make peace with your past
Make peace with your past

3. Research Shows That Past Experiences Can Negatively Impact Our Future In A Variety Of Ways.

However if you have come to understand these experiences and make sense of them you are much less likely to suffer from them, recreate them or re-experience them.

4. Holding On To Unpeaceful Elements Of Your Past Can Be Hard For Those Around You.

We all come with a past but if you’re projecting too much negative behavior onto a current partner, friend, boss or co-worker it can be very damaging to the friendship or relationship and it’s less likely to blossom into something supportive.

Related: How Mindfulness Can Help You Let Go Of Past Hurts and Heal Yourself

5. Many Uncomfortable Experiences In Our Past Can Be Viewed In A More Helpful Way.

The times we didn’t receive the love we’d hoped for from someone, or we experienced trauma, loss or failure can be our greatest teachers. They can be the very things that make us stronger, more understanding, or allows us to decide what we don’t want to do, be like or be a part of.

Our pain can also offer us the opportunity to learn about healing and this is an invaluable skill to have and help others within life.

You can check out Chanelle Sowden’s (Childhood Therapist) Instagram page here.


Written By Chanelle Sowden
Originally Appeared In Chanelle Sowden
Reasons Make Peace With Your Past Pin
Make peace with your past
Reasons To Make Peace With Your Past pin
reasons to make peace with past pinop
reasons to make peace with past pin

Chanelle Sowden

Chanelle Sowden is a Psychotherapeutic Counsellor specialising in understanding childhood. For over ten years she has studied and worked with adults and children helping them overcome fears, change patterns and feel better around others and in relationships. As a therapist, and coach, she has worked with adults, and children in schools, GP practices and charity organisations as well as her own private practice. She has studied many different theories and models to help her understand the bigger picture of what we need to feel ‘good enough’.View Author posts

1 thought on “5 Reasons To Make Peace With Your Past”

  1. Avatar of Bernadette Gelata

    This is something I know I need to do but how? I hurt and have been for so long I’m looking for a good therapist at ppi in Harrisburg pa area where they said I can go

Leave a Reply

Up Next

7 Things To Consider When Making A Midlife Career Change

Things To Consider When Making A Midlife Career Change

Are you one of those who are wondering how to go about making a career change at 50? A midlife career change can be exciting but terrifying as well, so here are some of the things to consider as well as options you can consider.

Changing careers is always challenging. But sometimes, a change is all you need to find workplace happiness and a feeling of accomplishment. We see several people changing their careers in their 40s and 50s to find better work-life balance and more tremendous success. 

The first step in a midlife career change is accepting it is possible. An average person holds 12 jobs in their lifetime – and more often than not, if you look at their journey, you’ll see that the jobs they held towards the end of their career had nothing to do with the jobs they started with.

Up Next

How To Improve Your Relationship With Yourself

Improve Relationship With Yourself

Having a healthy relationship with yourself is extremely important when it comes to living a happy and content life. Let's find out what you can do to improve your relationship with yourself.

Key Points:

Many people would be glad to work on self-improvement but believe they don't have enough time for it.

A change in mindset can help them take advantage of the time they already spend transitioning between locations or tasks.

These transition times can be used to check in with themselves and gain a better understanding of how they're feeling.

The thought of adding or removing a habit fr

Up Next

Feeling Down? 5 Reasons Why You Feel Like Shit And What To Do About It

Feelings that make you feel like shit

Feeling down? Me too, buddy. The keyword here is ‘feeling’. Feelings are weird, if you ask me. Emotions make life complicated. It ruins relationships, families and even careers. It makes you feel like shit and like hitting your head against the wall. But that’s not completely true, is it? 

Not all emotions pull you down. After all, who would we be if we didn’t feel anything? Emotions make us who we are and it adds meaning to our lives. The secret lies in identifying which negative emotions make you feel like shit and knowing how to deal with them.

Dear negative feelings, thanks for making me feel like shit 

Yes, I know we should experience the whole spectrum of human emotions

Up Next

How to Tame and Silence Your Inner Critic: 5 Ways

Ways Tame And Silence Your Inner Critic

“Turn down the volume of your negative inner voice and create a nurturing inner voice to take it’s place. When you make a mistake, forgive yourself, learn from it, and move on instead of obsessing about it. Equally important, don’t allow anyone else to dwell on your mistakes or shortcomings or to expect perfection from you.” ― Beverly Engel. This one quote perfectly shows why it's important to silence your inner critic.

Do you have a love/hate relationship with your inner monologue? You know, the voice that can motivate you to press on or stop you dead in your tracks and make you feel a few inches tall.

It is the same voice that attempts to protect you from shame, embarrassment, or making a mistake. If not tamed and regulated, this voice morphs into an intense critic, one that can sabotage and stagnate if it gains too much power.

<

Up Next

Thanksgiving Blues? 11 Ways On How To Feel Grateful When You Don’t

Thanksgiving Blues

Not feeling grateful this holiday season? Well, even if feel like there's less to celebrate this Thanksgiving 2022, here's how to feel grateful when you don't.

The expectation of feeling grateful can be challenging when we’re struggling with loneliness or relationship, work or health problems. It can be even harder to have gratitude around holidays when we see other people happily celebrating.

When you’re discouraged or weighed down with negative thoughts, there are several things you can do.