Skip to content

5 Lessons I Learned On My Journey To Love

Lessons I Learned On My Journey To Love

Love is bittersweet and unpredictable like life. You need to fall in love to understand love. Love is not the epitome of happiness but a journey, a journey that needs to be learned. Being in love, and having relationships is learning about yourself. Only your experiences can teach you about yourself, and these love lessons will help you see the clear picture, that can be of the foundation of trust and commitment or the illusion of kissing the frog.

All, everything that I understand, I only understand because I love. — Leo Tolstoy

Love is very individual and experiential. 

We tend to learn how to love the hard way – by making mistakes and hopefully learning from them. We all have lessons we’re meant to learn based on where we’re at and where we are meant to be.  The distance between these two places is bridged by the experiences that help us learn and grow into our best selves.

If you tend to compare yourself to other women (i.e. can’t understand why they’ve found love and I haven’t, let these comparisons go.

Keep in mind that every woman is on her own journey – some paths are more direct while other paths take indirect routes – all meant for each individual’s greater good.

Love Lessons
5 Lessons I Learned On My Journey To Love

The Typical Journey to Love

Most every woman’s process of finding love (myself included) goes something like this…the trial and error approach such as making mistakes, repeating the same unhealthy patterns, dating and being in relationships with men who aren’t right for us, blaming the other person when problems come up, sacrificing our integrity, etc.

Then after much heartache and having had enough, an awakening happens when we realize things have to change.  This is what happened to me after two breakups with the man I dearly loved.  These breakups caused me to look within and reflect on how I had been approaching and perceiving love.

Read How To Make A Relationship Last: The Love Tank Theory

5 Major Love Lessons

By reflecting and making positive changes within, I’m able to share these valuable lessons to help alleviate further heartache and shortcut your journey to love.

Lesson 1: Everything happens for your greater good

Everything happens for your greater good, especially love’s difficulties.  It may not seem like it at the time, yet these difficulties are happening to help you learn, grow and become your best self.

When you’re in a challenging situation, don’t ask, “Why me?  Why is this happening to me…?  Why is he doing this…?”

Instead, ask, “Why is this happening for me?  What is the positive lesson I’m meant to learn from this?  How I can take this situation and apply it in a way that helps me grow?  What is perfection in this situation?”  Then stay open to the answers that come up.

Lesson 2: Love happens when you are ready

Love Lessons
5 Lessons I Learned On My Journey To Love

If you think that time is running out, it’s understandable to want love now.  Wanting love now can actually be harmful because you will tend to be desperate, overlook red flags, and settle for a guy who isn’t the best fit for you.

Love doesn’t just happen, and it doesn’t happen in the time you want it to. It takes a conscious effort by preparing yourself for love; putting yourself in places to meet the one; getting comfortable with the unknown; and having faith that loves happens at the right time.

While you’re preparing yourself for love, live your life by doing things you love, discovering your passions, soothing your soul, spending time with people who care for your well-being, and living a healthy lifestyle.

Read 7 Daily Rituals Intentional Couples Use to Cultivate Lasting Love

Pages: 1 2

Janet Ong Zimmerman

Janet Ong Zimmerman, founder of Love for Successful Women, mentors women are professionally successful yet still missing that deep and meaningful love. She helps them simplify love, so they can see things clearly and know what to do. Janet's gentle and introspective manner helps her clients feel at ease, confident and hopeful about love. Her own experience of marrying her soul mate later in life has reinforced her belief any woman, at any age, can have the love they desire. Janet wholeheartedly believes there is a special someone for every woman. Janet inspires women to open their hearts to the real meaning of love through her editorial contributions to Your Tango, eHarmony, and the Huffington Post Live. Your monthly guide to love is filled with insightful articles, inspirational resources and best practices that you can put into immediate use. You canread current and past issues here.View Author posts