12 Things You Can Do To Build Your Self-Esteem: A Step-By-Step Guide

build your self esteem

Nothing is worse than having low self-esteem. How you feel about and what you think about yourself determines how you live your life. Low self-esteem makes you feel horrible about yourself which affects your will and motivation to do anything in life.

You can easily spiral down in the dark pit of negative thinking restricted by your damaging and limiting beliefs. This is why it is crucial to build self-esteem and have a high opinion about who you are and what you are capable of.

Self-esteem is a driving force behind our confidence and how we see and feel about ourselves. It encompasses our sense of value, significance, and self-worth. That’s why learning how to build self-esteem is essential to personal growth and happiness.

Research has shown that over 80% of people struggle with varying levels of low self-esteem. Yet, having a solid sense of self-esteem has the chance to positively impact and powerfully transform every area of your life – from your relationships to your career, from your health and well-being to your fulfillment and levels of success.

A deep feeling of self-esteem is something that needs to grow and be nurtured over time. In this article, I will show you the things you can do right now to learn how to improve self-esteem. Then, you will realize your hidden potential and your self-worth.

Related: 5 Life Changing Habits That Build Self Esteem

What Is Self-Esteem?

While the dictionary defines it as “confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect,” put simply, self-esteem is the overall sense or feeling you have about your own self-worth or self-value.

Self-confidence, on the other hand, is more about how you feel about your abilities and will vary from situation to situation. You can have great self-esteem (feeling good about yourself overall) but low self-confidence about a particular situation or event (e.g. public speaking). Or, maybe you’ve got great self-confidence in an area (e.g. a sport that you play) but low self-esteem overall.

A strong and solid sense of self-esteem comes from deep within, from a belief in your importance, your value, and your worthiness. The good news is that there are many ways to improve self-esteem, which we will look at below.

Causes Of Low Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem can stem from many areas. It is largely influenced by how other people see and treat us, and our relationships, which is why the influence of our parents has the most significant impact on our self-esteem. Here are some of the most common causes of low self-esteem:

An Unhappy Childhood

Those who grew up with critical, abusive, or neglectful parents are more likely to face challenges with their own self-worth, while those who experienced acceptance, approval, and affection are more likely to have a higher sense of self-value.

Traumatic Experiences

Lower levels of self-esteem can also stem from bad experiences or traumatic events, such as being bullied or being in an emotionally abusive relationship. Essentially, it can stem from anything that has brought up feelings of shame, guilt, or worthlessness.

Experiences of Failure

For some, lower self-esteem is connected to their success and accomplishments, or lack thereof, including experiences of failure, or not achieving goals or expectations.

Negative Self-Talk

Many cases of low self-esteem are perpetuated by negative self-talk. This could be a story that you have created yourself or that someone else created for you long ago that you continue to believe, and it gets in the way of learning how to build self-esteem.

Maybe for you, like for many others, low self-esteem is rooted in your feelings about your appearance or body image. It’s not just about how you look; it’s about how you feel about how you look. We are bombarded with messages from an early age about being too fat, too thin, too short, too tall, or too much of anything, or not enough of something else.

Related: 10 Habits That Cause Low Self Esteem And Depression

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Tracy Kennedy

As a results-driven coach and consultant, Tracy partners with individuals to help them achieve greater levels of happiness, fulfillment, and success - personally and professionally. Over the last twenty years, she’s worked in many roles: personal & professional development coach, leadership & team consultant, course facilitator & trainer, product development & content creator, and leader. She’s had the opportunity to work with thousands of individuals, teams, and organizations across a wide variety of roles and industries. From running education centers for kids to defining and executing business strategy in small businesses to building content, products, and technology which have been implemented and used in Fortune 100 companies. Tracy has coached dozens of coaches, trained trainers and consulted strategic clients in relation to team performance and leadership development. Amongst other methodologies, she is trained in The Instinctive Drives System™, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Intrinsic Health, and Integrative Wellness principles. While her primary focus is coaching, she can also be found writing as the Personal Development Expert for Lifehack, consulting in the areas of leadership and team development, building courses and curriculum for clients, and running training events in the areas of personal and professional development. MY STORY FEATURED IN VOYAGE LAView Author posts