Why Girls Hate ‘Nice’ Guys

 / 

Why Girls Hate 'Nice' Guys

Girls Hate ‘Nice’ Guys

So you’re a nice guy. Good for you. But there’s a good chance that she will hate your stinking guts for it. There’s a reason why they say ‘nice guys finish last.’ And although your crush says she wants a ‘nice guy’, she doesn’t want anything to do with them. So if you are a nice guy, your crush will hate you for it.

Sounds horrible. Why would a woman hate you for being nice?

Because you’re not just being nice. You’re also being dishonest.

“He’s so good to me,” she says. “And yet, something is off.”

What she’s not saying is, “There’s something I don’t trust in him.”

What is it, that something?

Rewind. It all started as a little boy.

You’re three years old, sitting on the living room carpet. You’re filling in balloons with a crayon in your coloring book. A shrill voice enters from the next room. Something’s wrong. You hear it in her tone.

“Honey, Mommy’s very upset with you!”
Your little boy heart drops. What did I do? You think.

She walks into the room with your cup of milk.
“You didn’t drink all your milk,” she says.

She hands you the milk.
“Go on. Drink it down. Be a good boy.”

Three gulps later, a white mustache lines your upper lip.

“Good boy. Now Mommy’s happy.”
She pats you on the head. Mommy’s happy. You’re happy. You can go back to coloring again.

CUT!!! Wait a minute! What the hell does this have to do with women and being a nice guy?

Read Why Women Love Bad Boys And Dump Nice Guys

From early childhood, we were taught to please her.

Like most men, our first most significant female relationship is with our mother. She is our primal connection to life. We came from her womb and have often suckled her breast. From a young age, we learn fast that our job is to please momma.

For the next fifteen years, our brain develops in an ecosystem of “make mommy happy.” And it’s not just her, it’s other women as well.

90% of our school teachers are female and reinforce the importance of making her happy. “Behave yourself” for a boy is code for make me happy.

Absent are the men, teaching us boys how to be in relationship with women. Often they’re emotionally withdrawn. Raised in the same “make momma happy” environment, they don’t want to upset momma either.

So often momma’s not happy with her husband. And you become her surrogate, her “little man.”

Some boys rebel against this unsolicited princedom. They act out, get aggressive. As grown men, they attempt to reclaim their power over women who they couldn’t make happy as a boy – discounting them, abusing them. They’ll do anything to avoid the mother wound.

You, on the other hand, luxuriate in the wound. You love the attention of the female. She redeems you. She defines you. Your desire to please her is so primal that you’ll give yourself away for her.

You’ll do it for as long as you believe you can get what you really want – love, sex, intimacy. And that’s where she senses your dishonesty.

Instead of directly advocating for your needs and desires, you’re nice.

And like her, you know “something’s off.” You feel weak with her. At her mercy. You can never get it right.

At your nadir, she’s a bitch, who complains all the time, even as you do everything to please her. You’re not the asshole who bullies her but sometimes you wish you could be.

Eventually, reality blows up. A big truth eludes you. And that truth is…

…the nice guy is a pathological version of the good boy.

So what’s a nice guy to do? How do you stop her hating you for being a nice guy?


Written by  Stuart Motola
Originally appeared in Stuart Motola

Why Girls Hate 'Nice' Guys pinterest
Why Girls Hate ‘Nice’ Guys
Girls Hate Nice Guys pinterest
Why Girls Hate ‘Nice’ Guys

— Share —

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply



Up Next

How To Make Right Decisions: 10 Proven Decision Making Tips You Can’t Afford To Miss

How to Make Right Decisions: Best Decision Making Tips

Have you ever found yourself standing at a crossroads, unsure of which path to take? Trust me, we’ve all been there! Life is full of decisions, big and small, that shape our journey and define who we are. This is why it’s crucial that we learn how to make right decisions.

Scratching your head about making a life-altering decision? Life loves throwing us curve-balls and forcing us to make decisions. Whether it’s choosing a career path, making a major purchase, or deciding on a life partner, the ability to make right decisions is an invaluable skill.

So let’s explore what is decision making and delve into some amazing decision making tips that will help you be a better decision maker. These practical insights help you navigate life’s crossroads with confidence and clarity.



Up Next

8 Things To Never Do In The Morning After Waking Up

Things To Never Do In The Morning After Waking Up

Mornings can be a battlefield, especially when the alarm clock rudely interrupts your dreams of tropical beaches and unlimited snooze buttons. But here’s the deal: there are certain things to never do, once you’ve woken up. Trust me, I’ve made my fair share of morning blunders.

Picture this: stumbling around and extremely groggy, you are reaching for that tempting snooze button like it’s your lifeline, only to realize that you’ve wasted precious time and now you are running late for work and household chores.

If you relate to this scenario, then it’s high time you ditch those toxic morning habits and practice some healthy ones. So, grab your coffee and read on to know about eight things to never do after you wake up in the morning.



Up Next

Monday Morning Inspiration: 8 Simple Tips to Make Your Monday Morning Better

Monday Morning Inspiration: Best Tips For Monday Morning

Discovering a way to enjoy the start of your week is hard for everyone. After a weekend full of relaxation, you have to go back to work or school and face another five days before you can rest again. If you’re looking for Monday morning inspiration, here are some tips!

Hearing an alarm on Monday morning feels like a punch in the gut. It’s an unpleasant reminder that it’s time to get up and do adult things again.

But out of this widespread feeling of discontent comes an opportunity for change! Instead of letting the Monday blues take over, let’s see if we can find some ways to find Monday morning motivation and make the first day of the week more enjoyable.



Up Next

9 Fun and Effective Exercises For Brain Health To Keep Your Mind Sharp

Fun Exercises For Brain Health To Keep Your Mind Sharp

Ever wonder how to keep your brain in top shape? Welcome to the gym for your mind! Let’s flex those mental muscles and discover the key to a sharper, healthier mind with the best exercises for brain health.

In a world where physical fitness often takes the spotlight, it’s time to shine a light on exercises that pump up your brain. There are certain brain exercises that can increase brain health, and boost cognitive function & mental agility.

Practicing brain exercises regularly can do wonders for your mind’s health, helping you stay sharp, focused, and mentally agile. So grab your mental sweatband, because we’ve got all the brain-boosting moves you need to unleash your inner genius. 

Best Ex



Up Next

Compulsive Pulling, Picking, Biting: The What, Why, and How of Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors

Tips For Overcoming Body Focused Repetitive Behaviors

Do you tend to bite your nails often? Do you have a habit of pulling your hair without even realizing it? Engaging in such repetitive behaviors that seem beyond your control can be a sign of body focused repetitive behaviors (BFRBs). So, are there any self-help tips for overcoming body focused repetitive behaviors?

Yes. Most of us frequently pick at our skin, pull our hair, bite our nails without being aware of it. While such habits can seem harmless at a glance, when it becomes uncontrollable and left unaddressed, body focused repetitive behaviors can seriously affect our mental health and quality of life.

Although such behaviors can be challenging and distressing, there are ways to overcome it. Let’s explore this complex and often misunderstood phenomenon, exploring what are body focused repetitive behaviors, its roots, i



Up Next

How To Exit Your Lazy Girl Era? 8 Steps To Bid Farewell To The Lazy You

How To Exit Your Lazy Girl Era? Steps To Say Goodbye

Are you tired of feeling stuck in the “lazy girl” era? Do you find yourself constantly being held back by the demons of procrastination and struggling to break free from its clutches? Well, you have come to the right place, because today we are going to talk about how to exit your lazy girl era.

We are going to explore eight effective strategies that can really help you say goodbye to your lazy girl era for good and be productive. So, if you’re ready to kick laziness to the curb and unleash your inner go-getter, keep reading and get ready to transform your life.

Related: Kaizen: A Japanese Technique for Overcoming Laziness



Up Next

5 Powerful Benefits of Imaginative Thinking

Imaginative Thinking: Powerful Benefits Of Imagination

The benefits of imaginative thinking are unending to be honest. However, in this article we are going to explore five of the most interesting and powerful benefits of imagination and imaginative thinking.

KEY POINTS

Imagination is a fundamental aspect of human life.

Imagination enables one to look beyond the world as it is.

Imagination helps create different lenses through which to see the world.

Our