Finding happiness seems to be what we’re all on the search for. Life is a struggle without it. What’s the point if you don’t feel and experience the joy from time to time?
“How to Achieve Happiness” is a pretty hot topic when it comes to the self-help world. Happiness is what our loved ones want for us. It’s what many of my clients are looking for when seeking my services. I’ve found that underneath many “presenting issues” is a solid desire for more joy and a life that brings happiness.
It’s common for me to hear:
“I’m unhappy.” I don’t know why and I want to become more happy.”
So, the million-dollar question is, “How do you become more happy?”
The human experience is not linear, meaning that happiness will vary to some degree. In the long run, this ebb and flow is helpful because it offers contrast, which helps us appreciate when our reality is rich.
However, when more of our days are filled with racing thoughts, about the future or feeling depressed about the past, that’s a loud signal that there’s a core issue that’s crying for help.
Related: 7 Myths That Stop You From Being Truly Happy
*Our emotions are like fire alarms. Our feelings are communicating with us via how they make us feel. Learning to decode what your emotions are saying will do you wonders.
A major theme in this article is that nothing goes away magically that’s calling for our attention to be dealt with and put to rest. We do NEED to deal with things in our life that are demanding our attention or there will be consequences.
This can be hard to hear, however, it’s really important to stomach, friends. Let’s keep going and get you through this so you can find your path to happy.
According to Jay Shetty, three behaviors tend to block us from feeling fulfilled and happy. We tend to numb, avoid and distract ourselves in life from the situations, people, and issues that we don’t want to face and deal with. When we do this, shocker, a bigger issue is created as a problem only gets bigger if unattended too.
Let’s go ahead and take a closer look at these blocking behaviors in order for you to evaluate what role they might be playing in your world.
3 Behaviors Blocking Your Happiness
Block #1 DISTRACTING yourself from what you don’t want to face.
Here are some ways that we distract ourselves that tend to go under the radar.
- Distraction one – allowing clutter to build up.
- Distraction two – hiding within negativity.
- Distraction three – holding grudges.
- Distraction four – seeking happiness outside of yourself.
- Distraction five – creating a habit of worry.
The thing about “distracting” ourselves from whatever it is that we don’t want to face, is that whatever we don’t confront, just becomes bigger. Distraction is what we do “in the meantime,” although the thing that we’re distracting ourselves from is just sitting there, getting bigger and taking up more space in the room. It will not go away without our acknowledgment.
Block #2 NUMBING yourself from what you don’t want to feel.
The act of numbing our emotions usually entails an external behavior that we do or, rather, “numb out” in. We can numb with things such as food, alcohol, social media, drama, or Netflix. Numbing acts as an escape from what we don’t want to feel, face and deal with.
As you may have guessed it, not coping with difficult emotions creates bigger issues down the road. As whatever we avoid will become bigger.
Related: 21 Habits That Happy People Master
