Being in a relationship with a person who has narcissistic personality disorder might be the most emotionally harrowing experience of your life.
The problem is, the victim nearly never recognizes the signs of abuse until it is too late. And the worst part- sometimes the effects of this abuse are so deeply ingrained in the victim’s psyche that it can take years for them to fully recover.
Here are 9 traits which are found amongst survivors and victims of narcissistic abuse. However not many people are able to link the two, but knowledge is power. Knowing about it can help you fight it.
1. Not being confident enough in your own capabilities
Before meeting the Narcissist, you might have had a decent amount of self worth, even if you weren’t the most confident being who walked on this earth. But all that would have changed drastically after. You no longer feel like your own person. Every single decision you make is through the lens of how others would judge you. You are no longer assured of your own choices and are always asking others for opinions and overall undermining yourself in favor of what others think is good or right.
2. Always second guessing yourself
It is almost second nature to a narcissist to warp the reality so that you are no longer sure of yourself. This helps them in getting away with almost anything they say or do. They question and falsify their actions so that you are left wondering whether you imagined everything. And soon you would lose the ability to distinguish between what’s real and what’s the smokescreen set up by the narcissist to befuddle you. There is always an internal conflict going inside your head where you question the reality you know versus the facts that the narcissist has conditioned you to believe.
3. Always finding yourself around toxic people
Another big problem with narcissistic abuse is that it very easily turns into this endless cycle of repeated trauma. Because being with a narcissus your perception of reality has changed, you are no longer able to differentiate between what is good for you, and what is equally as toxic as the previous relationship. You internalize the abuse and think of it as the new norm. So, even when you are running away from your abuser you are seeking and falling into the trap of even more people like them.
4. Being on an auto pilot with one instruction, to self destruct
A narcissist would make you believe that you have no talents at all, and you cannot ever do anything right. They ridicule you, taunt you and demean you to the point that you start sabotaging yourself. They want to completely crush your confidence so that you cannot stand up to them. And in doing so, they turn you into this empty shell of your former self. Things you used to excel at become too difficult to even attempt. They play so cruelly with your sense of confidence that you actually believe them when they tell that you’re worthless and your actions match these thoughts.