We all want to be happy but often we struggle against ourselves and situations around us to earn momentary happiness.
After careful observation of events happening in my life over time and how they unfold, I have come to learn the ways of sustained happiness.
You can be unbelievably happy.
Here are a few things I have learned to do, that makes my life full of happiness.
1) Avoid worries and fear
Has something happened so bad that it disturbs you?
Or do you fear that something pretty terrible might happen anytime soon?
When you feel this frustration, it is because you are fighting against what is actually happening.
You want it to be different, different from what it is or what you fear.
A better way to fight it is not to fight at all.
What will happen, will happen.
Do your part and let things flow as it should.
If it has already happened and you can’t do anything about it, then don’t.
If it hasn’t, then don’t worry about it.
A Chinese proverb says “that the birds of worry and care fly over your head, this you cannot change, but that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent”.
You have the choice not to worry about anything that is worrisome.
Kill your fears and live.
2) Kill Expectation
Imagine if you let go of your dependencies and expectations.
Imagine if you just let what happens…happen.
For many people, this is unimaginable, especially in relationships. It is easy to expect nothing from strangers or those not so close to you.
With relationships, the tendency is for you to become demanding or needy.
The problem is, you may start feeling sad or begin to judge the person when they don’t meet your expectations.
The only way you can avoid being unhappy in a relationship is when you love the person unconditionally.
When this is the case, what you expect the most is for the person to be alive to be loved.
True love is when you respond with respect, love, and kindness no matter what is going on in your life.
Now really imagine if you are in a relationship with someone you love unconditionally and who loves you the same way too.
Yes, you will always be happy together. Kill expectation before it steals your happiness, and possibly destroy your relationship.
3) Don’t hold on to the past
The fear of the future may bring us sadness, so can the memory of the past. Don’t let past events define you, even if they still hurt. You don’t have to deny your pain, but acknowledge that the past cannot be changed.
You can only change your response today. Create a positive response to your memory of the past.
This way, you can make good use of something unwanted – like recycling waste.
A good strategy is to look at the lessons thereof with gladness. Consider the timing of such an event, what if it had happened at a different time? The impact could have been worse than it was.